“So… that was insane. Right?” When he doesn’t reply, I reach for one of the glasses. “Are you thirsty?” I bring the cup to his lips and let him drink. “Easy, just a little… there.” I return the glass to the table and watch him inhale deeply. "Toren, talk to me. What did you see? What did they do to you?" His eyes are unseeing, he's begun to gulp down air, and what's worse is tears are starting to wet his cheeks.

"Toren- Toren, you're scaring me, come on and talk already.” Is he in shock? They wouldn’t have left him alone if he was, right? I pull a fur throw down from the back of the couch and tuck him in, feel his forehead for a fever. “I’m gonna get Roma back in here, okay? Just- just stay here.” When I start to rise, he grabs at my hand. I grit my teeth when he grips it like a lifeline and hard enough that he bruises me.

"Zara. I didn't know. I didn't know."  His eyes are glassy, haunted when he looks at me.

"Whatever it was, you can breathe now. You're alright. Whatever they did, it's over.”

"It's over," He repeats numbly. His eyes burn, the glass gaze shattering. His fingers are twisted in mine, hand hot. I can't let go. I don't think he'll let me go.

"Right. It's over. I don't know how they were able to-" Toren jerks away and sits up, taking in another shuddering breath.

“You want some more juice? It might help.” I pass his cup over and take up my own. We drink together quietly; I am relieved to see him grimace.

“That is… unexpectedly tart,” He tells me. But he drinks again.

“Um… do you wanna talk about it now? What you saw under the anesthetic?” I offer.

He looks into his cup, hunched over. “No. I think- I think far too much of our time has been spent on my- No. I don’t.”

“Okay.”

His knee bounces in nervous tension. “What about you?” He asks. “What did you see?”

I focus on the snacks they’ve left us. “You.”

Over the rim of his glass, Toren’s hazel eyes skewer me.

“You and Adriana. Like, I was there with you. Or I- I, was you? I could see through your eyes and feel everything you were- feeling." His mouth twists, but he sips again, silently passing over the tray of cheese slices when I reach for it.

"I guess it was when your parents were bringing her home for the first time. You- you were so excited.” I smile a little. “You never seem like that in District weekly. Not that I read that, I mean its fake gossip stuff but… still. I don’t think they’re an excellent source." He snorts at my last observation.

"District weekly is trash. It's never actual news, and they could care less about the truth in whatever they're reporting,” He tells me, refilling his glass. “The only positive I can give them is that they make certain not to mar my overall character with claims of sentimentality or womanizing ways.”

“Actually, I think it’s too bad they don’t show the softer side I saw. I like that version of you better than the one in magazines.” I focus on tearing off a hunk of bread and buttering it, ignoring his near spit take. “What?”

“But they reported my monetary value correctly. I have money,” Is his response.

“And apparently a tendency to drool when you sleep,” I reply.

"Why don't you like that version of me?” He frowns, shaking his head and staring hard at me.

“Cause that version of you looks like a dork.” I joke , but he shakes his head again.

“The people of both Clan and Districts reported me with a 73.5 likability rate in general conversation. When the conversation was directed towards my future as heir, it was confirmed that this rate went up by at least 11.2 percent." His brow furrows, thumb rubbing at his lips in thought. 

"Whelp, I can't argue with an entire 11.2 percent. Say money again, and maybe I'll strip." I bite into my snack, sighing blissfully.

“That would be highly inappropriate considering- you weren't serious. You're not serious." He bites his thumbnail, frowning around it. "You're completely irrational. It should matter what ability I have to provide for you and our future offspring."  He's earnest. And interrupting my bread.

I huff since he’s not going to let this go and turn towards him on the couch. "If you mean money and providing for ourselves sure that matters. But that's not exactly my go-to pick up line. When I was under, I could feel your excitement about taking care of your sister. Your mind was going about 800 miles a minute, and somehow it was all organized and five steps ahead. You were happy. As in genuinely, euphorically, and completely happy. And being genuine is way hotter than statistics. Trust me." I pass him the cheese plate and go back to stuffing my face. He manages to wait until I'm beginning to chew before shocking me into choking.

"You’re a brilliant person, Miss Rueben. I find intelligence a desirable trait in a partner." He pats my back lightly, passing juice over while I hack a lung and watches me drink it down.

"So, what, we're gonna sit here and talk turn-on's now?" I drink a bit more, catching my breath, and he shrugs.

"I'm making conversation. Intelligence is an attractive quality. I hate stupid people."

I snicker and try to start eating again.

"No wonder you can't stand me.” I reach for a cracker, glaring when he interrupts my snacking to cover my hand with his.

"I don't think you're stupid. I told you-" He says.

"Just what a girl wants to hear." I’m starting to wish he would have been put in a separate room, and I hope he'll stop hogging the cheese tray.

"I- you don't agree with the data?” He asks. I scowl at him, and he pushes the cheese back over. “You should know, that's not a rational approach. I mean, you would be better served by-" I feed him some bread to shut him up.

"Math doesn't tell me what your favorite color is or what you like to do in your spare time. It doesn't tell me how much you love your mom or that your baby sister is pretty much your favorite person in the world. I wanna know about that stuff, not how much your compatibility percentage goes up when you buy some stocks." He's still chewing, which means I can finally get my hands on the cheese plate. I pull it into my lap before he can stop me.

Perfect in her timing as always, the door opens, and Roma steps in, with Bash and Casper alongside her.

She asks after our wellbeing and then claps her hands lightly.

“If you will follow my technicians, you’ll be escorted back to the rooms you prepared for the Rites in. I think it might be best if you both had a short nap before the evening meal. Hopefully, by then we'll have something to tell you." She smiles apologetically, offering her hands to help us stand, and her lips purse briefly when Bash helps me instead.

. The technician is quiet as we travel up, past the room holding the bridge Toren and I met on and to a floor above it. I wasn't aware there was another floor in the layout; the building had looked so small before.

“Don’t they do  anything normal?” Bash mutters next to me. The elevator opens to a small room with French doors opposite us and a few abstract paintings hanging on the walls. The technician gestures to follow him through the doors, and we do, staying quiet if only because he seems more comfortable that way.

"You'll be roomed separately for now," He eventually says once we're halfway down a pebbled path. The sun has begun to set, and I think I can see a few stars hanging low to kiss it goodnight.  

Bash manages to wait until we've reached my room before he whirls around on me.

"Start talking. What did the technicians do? Why had it taken so long? You weren't hurt, or anything were you, you don't look right -" He runs his hands over my arms, eyes roving, and brow wrinkled. I push away his hands, sinking into the bed's softness and not bothering with kicking off my shoes even.

"It was- I feel kind of. I guess you could, um..." Should I be happy that we're in the final stages of testing? Should I be praying that it's not him, that there's still chance everything can be okay and healthy?

I settle for a shrug. Bash sighs, air escaping his lungs in a long, pitying whoosh. I hate that sigh.

"Zee..." He lays down beside me and lets me curl up on his chest.

"I thought It would all be perfect. And- it's not. But if it isn't Toren, who is it? Am I broken? Am I going to become a coanje? I-"

"That's not going to happen. I would never let anything happen to you, least of all that," He cuts in. I grip his shirt a little tighter.

"But it could. It almost happened to Papa; you remember. Which means I could be predisposed to it. Toren doesn't want anything to do with me, if it's supposed to be him or if my pendant is broken-" I can't finish the sentence. God, I can't even think about it. To lose my sense of self and then lose my sanity? It’s terrifying.

"Try to nap now. As the lady said, it was a busy day. I'll sleep too." He pulls the duvet over us and strokes my hair like he used to do when we were little. That and the electronic sound of the river gently splashing in speakers around the room helps me do just that.

***

 The next morning, Roma comes to the River Bend building and meets with me in the small sitting room attached to my quarters.

"How did you sleep? I do hope the night was restful for you," She begins. Her lab coat is as clean and blindingly white as the previous day's, but the dress under it this morning is a cheerful yellow. Her shoes are in the same color, heels sharp enough to stab, and they click on the tile as she walks across the room to meet me.

"It was fine. Thank you. Have you come to give me my results?" I ask. She laughs at my impatience, but it isn't unkindly. Roma strikes me as the sort to smile frequently.

“Yes, I was getting to that. I apologize for the wait, but we wanted to be certain of our results.” ." Her manicured nails fly over the tablet, smiling in satisfaction at it when it beeps.

"Are you certain you're ready for this, my dear?" 

"Yes, I think so." I swallow and try to push away my nerves and doubts. She looks down at the tablet screen, and her smiling grows a thousand times brighter.

"Congratulations, Zara. You've found your Bond mate.”

“I- it’s him? I have?” She chuckles at my amazement, nodding in delight.

“You have. You and Toren are perfectly compatible and scientifically speaking, made for one another. We'll have you go through one more Rite, and then we'll prepare your bonding ceremony." She looks as thrilled as I feel. “Might I suggest wearing your dress from yesterday? It’s a fitting occasion for it.” My heart is beating out of my chest, my smile so full that my cheeks hurt.

"Of course, we'll need to run the final rite right before you've eaten. It requires more samples and scans, you see," She continues, typing rapidly on the tablet.

"Right, of course- Can I see Toren? Does he know yet?" I want to go to him right now. I've seen into his mind, I know the anxiety he must be feeling, but it'll be okay-

"We chose to inform you first. Mr. Finch will require a delicate hand. Not to worry though," She adds when she sees my face fall, "He'll be undergoing the final rite as well. I intend to inform him now. If you'd like to finish preparing yourself for the day ahead, I'll send for you once we're ready." Still smiling, she gives me a little hug, which I return before she leaves.

Twirling in a charmed circle, I go to the window and lookout. The sunshine is streaming, and people are dancing. My fears were unfounded, just healthy nerves. I won’t become one of the Unattached. The birds are singing, just for me.

Today will be perfect. Nothing can ruin it.

TOREN - 15

"I'm sorry , Mr. Finch, but it looks like you were correct. The symptoms you are experiencing are, in fact, the side effects of an illness brought on by a malfunctioning pendant.”

Roma informs me. My heart sinks. For a moment, the night before, I'd begun to believe the crazy clan theory.

Just for a moment.

"What can be done? I intend to start treatments immediately, whatever will help cure me." I say instead. She smiles kindly and checks her tablet.

"Of course. We've already scheduled your first treatment, right before lunch. This way, we know you haven't eaten in the last twelve hours.  We want to see how far along the illness has progressed." Her French nails tap out a tablet staccato and give my mind a moment to stray. Despite my initial relief at confirming there is a treatment, questions are beginning to trickle into my thoughts.

Was a malfunctioning pendant typical?

Where did Miss Rueben connect in all this?

What about Miss Zara,how did she taken the news?

"Miss Rueben, has she been informed yet?" I ask. Roma nods and sighs sadly.

“She has. It was a shock, as I’m sure you can imagine. We’ve given her some time to be alone and try to process this.”

I'm sure it was. Her entire belief system, gone in an instant. And I had been less than cordial, even made a mockery of it. Mum would be ashamed. Shame curls now in my belly, leaving me squirming.

"Can... if she wouldn't mind, do you think I could see her?" We'd been friendly yesterday, and that was the second time she'd looked after me despite our being virtual strangers. The least I could do was convene with Cas and discuss what would most comfort her at a time like this. Roma's shaking her head, though, and any notion of that goes out the window.

"Miss Rueben has requested privacy at this time, and we will respect her wishes. However, she asked me to give you a message?" Curiosity springs forth. Roma chuckles at my head tilt.

“She says she understands, and has no expectations. You'll see her after the first treatment; you both will need to undergo it." I bow my head, and she pats my shoulder consolingly.

"Please don't trouble yourself, Mr. Finch. Such a thing happens from time to time. Scientifically speaking, the two of you aren't compatible. After the treatments, you'll feel much better." She promises. I nod again, sighing as she rises from her chair opposite the coffee table.

"Now, Miss Rueben has asked us to allow her to put on a brave face. The poor dear was devastated. So, should you see her beforehand, it would be best to say nothing to her."

 She taps something else out, and the tablet beeps.

"If you have no other questions-"

"Forgive the interruption, but I do have a few inquiries. For example, do your scientists have any idea what's been causing my symptoms? If not Miss Rueben, then something else must have acted as the triggering event." I try not to fidget when Roma's smile tightens. Perhaps I ought to have saved my questions for another time.

"You'll recall your pendant is one way of referring to the necklace and it's marker given to you at birth. Clansmen call them Gin Dori's, and they also receive them upon birth." She waits for me to nod my understanding. "At the time, the scientists were attempting to develop a more effective means of testing your blood samples for compatibility. This particular batch, which included your pendant and Miss Rueben's Gin Dori, should not have been sent out."