"Wake up! The painting and coloring set you wanted. Mr. Doctor insisted on giving it to you sooner." I see the nurse above me.

"Mr. Doctor? They call someone who takes humanity from others a doctor! Is Purple Shoes always this kind, or has he delved into kindness himself?"

- Enough talk. I'll put the things you wanted on the bed.

- Nurse, don't go. I have a question. How long have you and the other nurse been here?

- I think it's been a few hundred years.

- So why do you look like that, as if you haven't aged? Is Purple Shoes always this kind?

- Don't ask more questions. I'll put the things you wanted on the bed.

It seems that the question brings back painful memories; she becomes upset and leaves the room with sorrow.

Since the old man witnessed my luminous transformation, he's been eager to provide whatever I ask for. I don't know what dream he's had for me! Even according to my request, he has put curtains on the two doors of my rooms. I push aside the blanket and flip through the pages of my notebook with my tail. Before coming here, I had a sketchbook where I drew all sizes of the sun next to my grandmother. A grandmother I didn't know where or what she looked like. No one told me about her. Only once did my grandfather say that she left us to get closer to the sun. Now the old man has taken the trouble to bring my sketchbook from our home. I become more suspicious of his actions with every moment.

"Get ready to take the capsules." I've made my decision. I won't go through the forced ingestion of capsules and injections anymore. I step outside the room and sense the place where the freckled green worm used to be. Since the absence of the freckled green worm, I absorb more light each day. Like the others, I don't emit light myself, but when other worms are radiant, I absorb a bit of their light, each time more than the previous one. By expelling the capsule sooner from my body, I redirect the light back to them. I see the old woman from a distance, moving slowly and weakly. As she notices me, she lowers her head. After my capsule is out, I enter her room from behind. She turns towards me.

The old woman says, "What? Have you come to take my life? What are you waiting for?"

- Why would I take your life?

- Every day I see it. You don't have your own light! You become radiant with our light. If they don't remove the capsule from you, you might understand that we'll lose our light after all the effort we put into illuminating it. I've been trapped in this madhouse for five years and haven't been outside. You've come in five days, wanting to take all my light! You're a traitor! Someone like you might even take the place of the sun. If you want to absorb its light, if...

- I never do the things you say.

- They control you with the capsules now!

- I won't do this. But why don't you help me instead of scolding me?

- The only way for you is suicide. You have to do it before it's too late. You have to do it as soon as possible. If you reach a point where they make you a priest, they'll eliminate your suicidal tendencies with an injection.

- Commit suicide here? If I could, I would have done it without a doubt. The sun moans in my dreams every night.

- There is a way. But not now. You have to be patient. One of the worms has recently started oiling. When they take it to the brick room, go behind them. When the sun above the half-column lights up, get closer and absorb all its light.

- I'm weak for this. I can't absorb all its light.

- The weaker, the better. Your body can't endure it, and you'll die. Unless you don't want this!

- I'm not very sure about what you're saying. But it seems to be the only way. But if you're right, and if I become the one who kills the sun, I have to commit suicide in any way possible.

The pink worm is completely ready to reach the priest stage. They take him to the room below behind the nurse, just as the old woman said. Secretly, I go behind them, and as the sunlight surrounds the column, I close my eyes. The pink worm starts to illuminate. The light is absorbed into me, and I feel like I'm catching fire. I want to explode. I close my eyes. I don't know why the laughter of the purple shoe is in my ears!

- You are miraculous. You've absorbed all the light, even the sunlight above the column. Look around you.

- It seems the purple shoe is talking to me. I glance around the brick room. The worm impaled on the skewer doesn't emit any light. His flesh remains motionless.

- You managed to absorb all the light. Our method brought you to the result faster than the capsules. Bring a mirror for them.

- The nurse hands me a mirror. My entire body is burning with pink light.

- Does this mean I'm alive? I shouldn't be alive! Why isn't the pink worm moving?

- Yes, you are alive. You were born to kill, not to be killed! That worm was born to be killed. Can you imagine that? It's astonishing.

- I came here for love of the sun, not for killing.

I bang my head against the column repeatedly. The purple shoe grabs the end of my tail and wraps around its red staff. We ascend towards the upper floor. The floor releases me. The worms, upon seeing my light, are drawn to me, approaching with reverence. The old woman gazes at me from inside her room. I lose control; I close my eyes and begin absorbing their light. Nurses keep me away from the worms and take me to the room with the purple shoe. The dwarf man with a ring around his wrist plays with it, resembling a bracelet. He tells the nurses to leave.

- Listen carefully. You must always wear this ring from now on. And for a few more days, you must stay in this building until you have complete control over absorbing and expelling the light of others. You saw for yourself today that the capsules are not powerful for you. You need to practice absorbing and expelling light through the control of capsules and the ring for a few days. The ring will always be with you. And if you absorb or expel light against my instructions, I can control you with the ring. I will take care of you and won't let you escape from control. The most important part is that when you can have control over yourself, you will be sent to A religious and trapezoidal building. There you will see the priest worms with various lights. They all worship the sun and preach the sun, attracting sun worshippers. You have to absorb the light of worms that suicide tendency has intensified in them.

- I heard you're doing things that no one would want to commit suicide. So, how is it possible for someone to become self-destructive and take their own life?

- Sometimes the desire for suicide becomes stronger from the power within their own bodies. Another point about your responsibility, you cannot prevent suicidal people; you can only deal with the self-destructive worms. Suicidal individuals have no light of their own, and you can control them by absorbing light.

- I have a condition too, and that is I won't kill anyone.

- You're still very young, and everything seems grand in your mind. Perhaps you think the face worm is dead! That pink worm is not dead. With your power, you can capture the light of the self-destructive worms and render them unconscious. I'll send a worm with you to bring back the worms whose light has been absorbed here. What is your answer?

I remain silent. The dwarf spins the ring around his finger and approaches me, saying, "I know you've accepted it." He takes off the ring and holds up the end of my tail. Contrary to the direction of the scales on my tail, he slides the ring off. It hurts at first. I look at him, and the golden glow of the ring lights up my eyes. I crawl out with difficulty, and the weight of the ring has slowed me down.

The time to prepare for the capsules, the nurse asks me to stay inside my room. One of the lights from the square floor behind the nurse enters my room. I stretch, and the capsule is placed inside me. It hurts a lot. It's stronger and more painful than the previous shocks because the golden ring around my tail has intensified the capsule's shock. Tears overwhelm me. I have a little seizure. I see myself forcefully opening my parents' mouths, tears streaming down my face, and putting a spoonful of food in their mouths. An eerie light comes from behind me. It's the photographer's camera light, but I only see the photographer's tail.

After the capsule shock and the ring to my body, I don't have the strength to get up. The nurse enters the room with red headphones and The tall-handled broom stood. With each turn around herself, water and broom spill across the room. The pulling and twisting of her legs are synchronized. A whisper from the nurse's headphones comes out. The whisper of the death dream. I look at the room's ceiling. It's a cemetery. All the worms stand like statues on their coffins. The worms steal their flight dreams in the air and imprison them in a carriage. They let go of the carriage, and in the embrace of the dream, they whisper the dream of death, and the worms whisper the dream of death more in their hiddenness. The worms release the carriage and whisper death in the arms of the dream, and the carriage stops moving.

"Why are you hitting? Put the broom aside."

The nurse says, "I'm telling you where to put the food; you don't understand for two hours. I'm telling you, you have to eat your food here. Come on, say it. Will you eat on the floor or the bed?"

I weakly say on the bed. She puts the food down and leaves.

to be continued...