“Aife, are you alright?” Tia asks as we make my way to my chambers. I chuckle.

“Of course, why would I not be?” I answer, amused by his question.

“Well, it was only minutes ago when we were talking about your growing feelings for his highness and now there is a real possibility of an illegitimate child,” he says and I wave away his worries.

“You of all people should know that my feelings are irrelevant when speaking about the line of succession. If a child does exist and is proven to be Elio’s then he will face a choice, his duty to his country or to Lady Olivia,” I answer.

We stop in front of my chambers and I tell him to take the rest of the night off and that I’ll see him tomorrow. Before he leaves he comes close and whispers in my ears,

“You will bear a child eventually. Let life take its natural course,” he says.

Tia knew of my worries because he is the only one I dared to confide in. The sudden possibility of Elio having a child further escalated my worries because if a child does exists it is proof that if we fail to produce a child then the problem lies not with him but with me.

I am grateful that Tia knew how I wanted to be alone because I needed to process my thoughts. If Lady Olivia is indeed carrying Elio’s child then I need to be prepared for the possibility of an annulment. It would have been better if I am also with child, in that way I am at least assured an heir.

I make my way to the office adjacent our chambers and go through the documents that I wasn’t able to attend to earlier in the day. Worrying will do me no good, I’ve already informed the intelligence department to investigate Lady Olivia and there is nothing else to do on that front but wait. After a few hours I hear the door click followed by Elio’s angry footsteps.

“Did you really have to be so cruel?” he asks, bursting into my office.

I slowly turn my chair to face him, careful to maintain my calm facade. After a few minutes of my silence he shakes his head and continues.

“I heard something interesting from the staff. They said that you decided to board Olivia in your old bedchamber,” he says, his eyes questioning me but I stay silent.

“The bedchamber where you used to fornicate with your numerous lovers,” he raises his voice dumbfounded.

“Are you any nearer in making your point?” I ask and he scoffs.

“You are treating her like a harlot and you are making everyone in the palace believe that she is one,” he says, accusation in his voice.

“Do watch your tone with me Elio. I may be your wife but I don’t remember agreeing to be your inferior. It will do you well to remember that I am the empress before I am your wife and I will not sit here while you raise your voice and accuse me of your assumptions,” I tell him.

The ice in my voice brings him back to his senses and he seats across from me. His eyes searching my face for answers I haven’t yet given.

“First, I wasn’t cruel to Lady Olivia. It was well within my rights to have her thrown out of the palace or in the dungeons for claiming that she had your child without an ounce of proof but I didn’t. I granted her entry and an audience even when she visited unannounced. I did it as a favor to you because she was your lover,” I say, my eyes not straying from him.

“Second, I did instruct the butler to board her in my old bedchamber but it isn’t because of the reasons you have assumed. That bedchamber is the second safest bed room in this palace next to our bedchamber and contrary to popular belief I only ever bedded five men in that room. After all, this is only my vacation home,” I finish.

“I’m sorry Bell, I didn’t mean to raise my voice. I’m just confused, I don’t know whether I should be happy or if I’m even allowed to be happy and Olivia is frightened then it seemed as if you were threatening her,” he explains and I simply nod.

“I understand, I really do. However, I will never again tolerate you accusing me of anything without sufficient proof. Our relationship is supposed to be based on trust and we already started on thin ice. Before you point your fingers at me, consider every possibility even the possibility of the pregnancy being staged,” I tell him.

I stand and make my way to our bedroom, he follows.

“But why would she do that?” He asks, confused.

“Why do most of us do what we do?” I ask back and his forehead scrunches in wonder.

“Ponder on that question and tell me if an idea comes to you,” I say.

I put on my robe and an extra shawl then I make my way to the door.

“Where are you off to at this hour?” He asks.

“I need to take a walk, don’t wait for me. I might take long,” I answer him closing the door behind me.

Unlike in the Pavenia palace where I could find my solace in a secret room on one of the abandoned attics, my escape in the Tiarhan palace holds an unhindered view of the sky. Deep in my mother’s favorite garden, a gazebo with glass ceilings can be accessed through a hidden passage. My mother was the one who told me about the passage. I walk through the passage, remembering my mother’s words.

She told me of a story where a valiant prince relentlessly courted a beautiful commoner. The prince showered the woman with jewels and gold but the woman wasn’t fazed by these gifts. The woman always told the prince that all it would take for the prince to win the heart of the woman is if he could bottle the stars and present it to her. The prince agonized over how to bottle the stars for the woman.

He tried to eternalize the beauty of the stars by having it painted, he also surveyed the land and gifted the woman the area where the stars shone the brightest, and he also tried catching a shooting star. After trying different methods and failing to bottle the stars, the prince was on the verge of giving up when the woman suddenly accepted his heart.

The woman told the prince that it was never really the bottling of the stars that the woman wanted. It was the prince’s dedication in making the woman happy. The two were wedded and the prince erected a castle on the land he had gifted the woman - where the stars shone the brightest, offering it to her princess.

In that castle, hidden in the garden of nychta is a gazebo with glass ceilings. If one lies under, it creates the illusion of stars inside a bottle - a symbol of the prince’s dedication to his princess’ happiness.

My mother then told me of the legend that wishing upon a star while lying under the glass ceiling on a dark moon would grant any wish made with a sincere heart. I remember how I used to spend countless night under the gazebo, waiting for the dark moon and wishing upon the stars.

Tonight I haven’t any desire to wish upon a star but I still find myself drawn to the peace and quiet that the gazebo provides. I remove my shwal and spread it on the floor then I lay down. I watch the stars twinkle, oblivious to the mundane problems just beneath them. I let my mind drift, asking myself questions I never could have asked myself if I had stayed in the room with Elio.

Was I angry at him? Surely not, before entering the marriage we both knew of each other’s proclivities but then, why was I strongly affected by the possibility of him fathering Lady Olivia’s child? It could not be something as shallow as him being my husband especially since we had just started growing closer.

I recall the events leading up to Lady Olivia’s arrival - the consummation of our marriage, him trailing after me for a week to learn about politics, eating together, and even speaking to each other before we went to sleep. I release a sigh, realizing why I became upset.

The past few days have made me more vulnerable than I thought. Looking back I put in effort in letting him know more about me. I felt a sense of belonging as well as a certain degree of safety when I saw that he liked what he saw. The reason why I became so upset was because of how easy it was for him to paint me as a villain in the story, he didn’t even need proof.

It was the ease with which he was swayed by his preconceived notions of me, the whispers he heard from unknown mouths, and the finger Lady Olivia probably pointed toward me. I am not simply upset. I am hurt because except for Tia, he is the only other person with whom I tried to open up myself up to. It seems I was wrong in assuming that our relationship has been getting stronger.

When I understood where the unpleasant feelings came from I started feeling it deeper until it filled my lungs with dread and I find myself desperately gasping for air. I sit up then I force myself to slow my breath, telling my brain over and over that I needed air in my lungs. I focus on the act of breathing air in and out until my heart slowed and the pain gradually subsided.

I chuckle. When did I become this pathetic of a person, gasping for air because my irrelevant feelings were hurt by a sheltered man who is still wet behind the ears? I close my eyes and visualize myself repairing the holes in my armor, inspecting every crevice and ensuring that there was not even a tiny hole left then I shove my feelings for Elio in a box and lock it tight.

Tonight I have decided that Taydin Elio Alissier cannot be trusted. If it was this easy to persuade him against me then he is a threat to everything I hold dear. It would be easy for him to be manipulated for someone else’s gain and it would be undoubtedly effortless for someone to exploit him for information about me.

I strengthen my resolve and stand, making my way to the butler’s office. When I arrive I see the surprise on his face. I requested for another bedchamber and he complies, not asking any questions even though I could see that he wanted to know the reason quite desperately.

Michael served my parents and he has been serving me since I ascended. I know he thinks of me as his own granddaughter and as much as possible I don’t want to worry him unnecessarily. When he escorts me to my new room, I wrap his hands in mine and squeeze, assuring him that everything was fine and he smiles, bowing to leave.

I didn’t want to think that I was running away from Elio but I also know that it would do me no good if I face him now. He would just be a painful reminder of his fickle faith in me as a person and as his wife. I would speak to him when I myself deem it appropriate, not a second before.

As I had expected Elio searched for me the next day. I told the messenger to tell him that I would be overcome with work for the next few days and that I won’t be able to sleep in our chambers. I also told him to relay that I will send word if I ever free up some time then I instruct all my guards, the butler, and my personal maid to never disclose where my current sleeping quarters are as well as to redirect Elio away from me when necessary.

I knew that Tia would eventually question my instructions but I was thankful that he wasn’t pressing me for answers until he did. When the afternoon came and as I was on my way to take a recess, Tia followed me relentlessly, silent but imposing; he knew that I wouldn’t be able to endure the torturous silence between us and after a few minutes I gave up.

“I don’t want to see him because he hurt me. I need time to gather myself. End of story,” I say in one breath. After I said the words it was as if a dam had broken and I couldn’t stop myself.

“It hurt me to see how easy it was for him to be swayed by baseless rumors. It hurt me to realize that the feelings he professed for me were easily toppled by a mere whisper from Lady Olivia. It was painful to see how easily he managed to make me into a villain. I thought our rapport had gotten stronger, it seems our relationship was just a shallow illusion of what I wanted it to be,” I explain further.

Tia envelops me in a hug and continuously whispers that everything will be okay, in that moment I believed that it would be. After a week of successfully avoiding both Elio and Lady Olivia I started to grow anxious. I’m running out of excuses and the last thing I need and want are the nobles getting wind of what has transpired in the palace. I’m at my wit’s end and what I need is information so I could concoct a plan.

The gods may have heard my desperate plea because a few moments later, I receive the intel I was waiting for. I was about to examine the document when a messenger knocks on the door. I quickly hide the document in one of the safes and let him in.

“Your imperial majesty,” he greets, bowing. “I am here upon the behest of Marquess Alissier who is requesting for entry into the palace,” he finishes.

I purse my lips and nod. When the door closes, I lay my head on the desk and release a heavy sigh. Great, another uninvited guest from the Ocelon kingdom as if I needed another complication added onto my plate.