The way he takes over is never pleasant. It’s a struggle. A fight. A brawl. We always fight for control but we both know who wins in the end. It’s always him. He doesn’t like me much, neither do I like him. He takes over my life for two full nights every month and I hate it. I hate waking up to whatever antics he has been up to.

He runs through the forest, and I’m just a passenger. He runs and I wait. He runs and I doze off until he finally catches something. Another rabbit. He loves rabbits because their bones crunch deliciously between his teeth. He doesn’t have to deal with the aftermath of puking it all up the day after. He doesn’t have to deal with any aftermath at all.

 ***

“You look like hell,” Abel noted and handed me his sunglasses.

“Cheers,” I muttered and put them on, and then taking the cup of coffee he had bought me.

“Full moon kicking your ass?”

I nodded tiredly. “I haven’t been to bed yet. Woke up in the woods this morning, went home and showered and came here.” I put my head down on the table in the cafeteria. I felt Abel pat my head.

“Are you in for another dumb night tonight?”

I nodded without lifting my head.

“How about we do something nice in the weekend then? Like movies and a pizza.”

I tipped my head up and rested my chin on my arm. “That sounds nice.”

“Yeah? We can also do something else, if you wanna. Like there’s a party…”

“Actually, going to a party sounds better.” I lifted my head and handed him his sunglasses back. “I haven’t been to one in ages.”

“Don’t you wanna sleep and relax?”

“Parties are relaxing,” I snorted.

“You’re an extrovert.” Abel smiled and poked me in the cheek with his pointing-finger.

“Can’t lie, I am. I just prefer to be around people.” I shrugged a little.

“Am I not people to you?”

“Well, you’ll be at the party too, right?”

“I mean… Yeah. We could like… Go together.” He wringed his hands a little.

“Yeah, that sounds good.”

His shoulders went up to his ears, almost, and he straightened his back as he smiled. He smiled like I had just given him exactly what he wanted for his birthday. I didn’t really get why he was this stoked about going to a party with me. I mean, we did a lot of things together already. Ate lunch together every day. Spent the weekends watching films and eating junk. We were friends.

 ***

He did it again. Ran through the forest like an absolute maniac. Killed a bunch of rabbits again. No rabbit is safe from the big bad wolf. It’s pathetic. He’s pathetic. He only wants to eat and lurk around in the undergrowth. He cleans his paws occasionally with his teeth. It’s gross. He’s gross.

 ***

I know I said we were friends, but I was still nervous, waiting for him to pick me up. Once again, I hadn’t known what to wear and my hair was a disaster. Everything was a disaster. I felt like I looked like a moron trying to look fancy in my black dress shirt. I had even found a pair of jeans with no holes in them. But Abel looked so good. He always did and while I really liked looking at him, I’d also love to look like him. Being gay is just a constant confusion of ‘do I wanna sleep with this person, or do I want to be them?’

He pulled up in his ridiculous car and waved at me. How did he always look gorgeous in simple black t-shirts? It wasn’t fair.

“You ready for this?” he asked and turned the music down a bit.

“Yeah, I’ve been looking forward to it.”

“Y-you have?” He sounded so nervous.

“Of course,” I said and smiled at him.

He focused on the road and didn’t say anything, but occasionally I’d catch him trying to supress a smile. I wasn’t sure what he was so giddy about. We were just going to a club, having some drinks and stuff. I had pretty much buried the dreams of dates with him, since he didn’t actually ask me out and I didn’t have the guts to ask him. So… And I wasn’t even sure if he liked me like that. Maybe he wasn’t even into guys. Maybe he was just-

My line of thought abruptly stopped when we stopped in front of a club. It had rainbow flags all over it and it was clearly a gay club. He had taken me to a gay club.

“You alright?” he asked and took the keys out of the ignition.

“More than alright,” I said, beaming.

A fang slipped over Abel’s bottom lip, and he jerked his head, motioning me to follow him out of the car. I could feel the bass from the club all the way from out here and it pumped me up. I was so ready to let loose and have a nice time.

Clubs and bars had been my scene when I was a little younger. It was the way to get out when you have no friends. At the clubs you always made new friends for the night. Some of those friends became friends with certain benefits for a time.

We were able to jump the line outside of the club for some reason. Seemed like Abel knew the doorman, shaking his hand waving me through the door.

There was a bit of a crowd, and I would’ve been lost if Abel’s hand didn’t slip into mine. He flashed me a smile over his shoulder as he parted the crowd for me.

So, I wasn’t sure this was as platonic as I had thought. I mean, two platonic guy friends usually didn’t hold hands. Not like this. His fingers interlocked with mine.

The heat in my face was about to make me faint, but then we were through the crowd and Abel let go. He turned and smiled. “Do you want a drink?”

“Sure,” I said beating down my desire to stammer through that one word.

We went to the bar, and it was quite crowded. Lots of people waiting around to get a drink or enjoyed their drinks by it. The music wasn’t too loud here either, so you could easily have a conversation. It was quite nice actually. Like, higher end than I had ever tried. Lots of space to sit too and it weren’t booths. It was those high tables with highchairs and nice lamps hanging over all the tables.

“Is this a restaurant as well?” I asked.

“Yeah, during the day they actually serve a banging risotto.”

“I’d like to try that.”

“Right, right, right.” Abel nodded at each word and then stopped. “Wait, with me?”

“Yeah, that’d be even nicer.”

He smiled so widely again. It was adorable. As if I was some priced person to spend time with. I couldn’t even deny it didn’t do wonders for my little ego to have his full attention.

“What do you wanna drink?” he asked then as the bartender made his way towards us.

“Whatever you’re having.”

He ordered long island ice teas. He actually ordered us the strongest cocktails the bar served, and I found it hilarious. I kind of expected him to order us beers, but at this point I should’ve known he didn’t give a shit about what anyone thought of him. He could probably order frozen strawberry daiquiris with little umbrellas and sparkles in them with no problem. And I liked it. I had dated some guys who desperately tried fighting against any kind of stereotype or any association with femineity in any shape or form. And they had deemed cocktails femme. I hated it. I hated the whole thing, and it only made me fall a bit more for Abel, because he didn’t seem to care.

When we got our drinks there were umbrellas in them as well and when we clinked our glasses together, Abel laughed and took a big sip through the pink plastic straw. I did too and then put the drink on the bar, afraid I’d drop it. The glass was chilled and wet, and I could feel it just slip through my fingers any moment now.

My hands were incredibly sweaty as well. I kept going through the motions with Abel. One minute, I was sure we were just friends, but then he took my hand. Looked at me a certain way. Smiled so wholeheartedly. He had one dimple on his left cheek and none on his right and it was just… Like, he was adorably handsome. It was like he didn’t even know how he looked. Everyone who passed us at the bar, stopped for a second to have a proper look at him. The high cheek bones, the thin upper lip but full bottom lip, his black hair, the golden skin… He was just gorgeous and frankly looked a lot like a model. I mean, I’d love for him to model for me sometimes.

Abel was telling me about some of his classes and oh my god, it was so boring, but I’d listen to him nerd out about his classes till the end of time. He could tell me in detail about grass growing and I’d love every single second of it.

Just as he was telling me about one of his classmates getting an answer so terribly wrong, someone pushed me from behind, effectively shoving my face straight into Abel’s chest. It wasn’t so much about the fact that I face-planted his surprisingly hard chest. It was the fact his hands immediately landed on my lower back. My own hands were balled in his shirt. I was staring up at him. And he looked pretty relaxed for someone who just had another person shoved into them.

And we just stood there. I honestly didn’t want to leave. Maybe it was because I was exhausted from the full moon or because I had been so lonely, or maybe it was because I genuinely liked Abel. Probably a combination of all three. But I stretched to my toes as he bent down, and I pressed my lips to his. My pulse was hammering in my ears. It was such a nice kiss too. Very soft and sweet.

Abel pulled back a little, smiling. “Boy, am I glad I asked you out now.”

I snorted and wet my lips a little. “I gotta admit I didn’t even know… This was like… A date.”

“I mean, I took you to the gayest club and then talked up their risotto,” he laughed and pulled me a little closer, his hands still on my lower back.

“I haven’t exactly done a whole lot of actual dating.” I cringed a little.

“Don’t worry about it. It’s not like I’ve had the most experience either. I’m not really into the whole… ‘Bang and go’ thing. I like deep connections.”

I nodded. “I get that. Especially considering our position in this world.”

“Yeah. Haven’t actually dated outside of the paranormal community for that exact reason. Can’t be fucked.”

“I haven’t dated inside of it yet. Or I mean… Until now.”

He smiled again. God, his smile was so cute. “I hope it’ll live up to the hype.”

“What hype?” I laughed.

He laughed too and shrugged, finally letting go of me and taking a sip of his drink. I followed his example. It didn’t help the fire happening in my face in my face though.

We had kissed! I was ridiculously happy, and I had never really been this happy about kissing someone. But I had also never liked anyone the way I liked Abel. The fact that he knew about my curse just made everything so much easier. I didn’t have to hide anything, and it felt so freeing.

I wanted to repeat this kiss. I wanted to do it many times. I wanted to do a lot more than kissing too.

“So, wanna go home to my place after this?” I asked. You miss all the shots you don’t take, or something. And Abel had been taking all the shots so far, so it was my time now.

“I would, but… I uh, was serious about the whole no ‘bang and go’.” He smiled a little awkwardly. Looked more like a grimace really. “I’d… Like to go on more dates. First. If that’s alright.”

“I’d like that,” I said and took his hand in mine. “But we can still go to my place later and watch a movie, right?”

“Yeah. That sounds nice.”