Bradley

"For fucks sake Nalfain, I'm not buying you more Oreos! That's your fifth pack this week."

Nalfain slides his sunglasses down to shoot me a glare, "They are delicious, I want them."

"How's it feel to want? Eat an apple when we get home instead, you like those." I snap, putting them back. Nal utters a Drow curse and snatches the pack off the shelf again, throwing it back into the cart defiantly.

"You will acquire them for me Bradley, or you can go hungry tonight." He gives me a cruel smirk, crossing his arms in resolve. I'm starting to wonder how he managed to stay alive this long; how did his family not off him sooner? He's every bit the self-absorbed, conceited, ungrateful bastard. I hate him as much as I need him, and it's becoming quite the predicament.

"Whatever, don't say I never gave you anything" I grumble, tossing four more packs in with defeat. This elf has a major sweet tooth, and a serious rage problem. I can't allow his temper to flare up in public, we can't afford the attention. Almost all of our fights aren't worth the energy, so it's just easier to give the pointy-eared bastard what he wants most days, and that pisses me the fuck off. Sometimes I feel like an irresponsible parent with a spoilt child. Parenting guides would affirm that giving him what he wants when he pouts is wrong, but I'm sure the authors of said guides have never met a Drow. I'm not Nalfain's parent, I'm more like the only responsible, rational, undead guy in the household. I can only imagine what a nightmare it'd be to raise a juvenile of his kind though. Hard pass.

"Bradley, look at these!" Nalfain's deep voice comes from the next aisle over—that elf moves silent and fast, the sneaky little bitch.

"Gimme a second" I mumble, pushing our cart around the corner to find him, and he's actually hovering in the baking aisle. I make a point of sighing audibly, "what, Nal?"

"Is the cake itself in this container? Is it magic?" His slender hand waving a box of Red Velvet cake mix for me to see. I can't help but chuckle—sometimes his limited understanding of the human world is entertaining, and dare I say cute even. I walk to his side, and he hands me the box so I can explain.

"It's not magic, the box just contains the things you need to make a cake. It’s sort of like having all of the components for a spell ready-made in a single container instead of having to go acquire them yourself, make sense?"

Nal narrows his eyes in curiosity, eyeing myself and the cake mix. "Fascinating, is it difficult to make?"

"Not really, you add a few basic ingredients to the mix, and then bake it in the oven and frost it yourself. It's like a short-cut to making cake; pretty hard to fuck up."

His dark eyes widen some as he scans the shelves, "I would like to make a cake tonight, Bradley." I try not to cringe visibly, because anytime Nal tries to cook everything goes to shit and something gets destroyed. He's begun to watch the Food Network the past several days which is fine, but he's not exactly patient, and he ended up breaking my Blendtec earlier this week. Baking is a relatively peaceful activity though, so maybe I should humor him. Fostering a non-violent skill in Nalfain may be prudent, but it all comes down to whether or not I can survive the teaching process without offing him.

"Fine. You'll need some frosting, or I can help you make some buttercream from scratch—either works." Nal glances at me, surprise and excitement flash briefly across his stupid pretty face "really?"

"Yeah, baking is probably the least violent thing you could do today, so I'll support it."

He actually smiles in response, sort of like a child who's just been told they get an extra dessert. I think it could've even been a genuine smile, which is almost disturbing in a way because it seems to go against his very nature. I choose to respond with an amiable one in return, but say nothing.

"I like the chocolate," he mutters, looking at different mixes. Nalfain can read English, but he struggles to understand colloquialisms, slang, cultural references, sarcasm, and so on. His speech always comes across unusual in its cadence, and slightly accented. I've gotten used to it though, and find it sort of amusing. If he weren't a homicidal maniac, I'd call it endearing, but there's nothing endearing about this creature. Nal's deceptively beautiful, and that's half the problem here. By nature he's a cruel, evil bastard and not to be trusted. If I let this motherfucker off-leash, he'd slit a cashier's throat for looking at him sideways.

"You'd probably like Devil's Food Cake," I finally say.

"Would I?"

"Probably, it's super moist, very chocolaty if that's what you're going for."

Nal hums in thought for a beat before making a decision, "fine. I should like that which you mentioned and the red one."

"Red velvet?"

"Yes."

"'Kay." I smirk, tossing both into the cart along with a can of vanilla and chocolate frosting.

"Why do you look at me this way?" Nal eyes me curiously as we begin to leave the aisle.

"Not sure what you mean."

"You know that which I meant Bradley, do you mock me?"

I shake my head and sigh, "no, Nal. I'm not mocking you."

"Then what is it?"

I just smile and shrug, "honestly it's just sort of cute you want to bake, that's all." The words coming out of my mouth cause me to wince inwardly.

"Cute?" Nalfain tilts his head, "what is cute?"

"It just...it means something is appealing, or attractive." My reluctant explanation causes a wicked little smirk to tug at the corner of his lips. Nal stalks over, expression strangely playful. He stops in front of me, eyes wandering over my body before a warm hand reaches out to adjust my coat collar. "You just gave me a compliment, didn't you Bradley?"

I scoff and shake my head, "As long as you think it was a compliment then that's all that matters." Nal just chuckles, smirk still tugging at his lips. I hate myself, now his ego is gonna get ten-times worse.

"Do you know what I think, Bradley?" He runs his finger tip across my collar bone and begins to trail it down my chest.

"Don't know, don't care." I grumble, batting his hand away. He exhales contentedly, examining his nails for a few tics before locking eyes with me. Nal closes the gap between us, his chest is pressed against mine. “Nal..” I start, and a hand tugs me down by the collar until our mouths are just a breadth away.

"Don't start with me, elf." I whisper.

Nal just hums as he slides his lips down my neck, pressing small kisses against it along the way—he's such a fucking tease, and he knows we’re in public. "You like me, Vampire" he purrs, nipping at my neck as he reaches down to squeeze me through my jeans. I can't help but inhale sharply, groaning at the arousal he's stirring. Nal's hand lingers just long enough to drive me crazy before releasing his grip, a smug little grin on his face.

"Pointy-eared fucker,” I shove him off me while tryng to kill the hard-on he just triggered.

"You're welcome," he crows smugly.

“little shit" I mutter, shoving my hand in my pocket to readjust myself slightly. He's figured out how to push all of my buttons, and I'm not sure I like the power it gives him. Unlike humans, I can't manipulate Nalfain nor can he be charmed, and it sucks.

“Admit it, I win." He smirks.

“No.”

His eyes drop to pointedly to bulge in my jeans and then lock with mine “well your cock says otherwise, Bradley.”

I groan audibly, and roll my eyes dismissively. “Just drop it, Nal and let’s get out of here. Baking is gonna drain my patience..." I mutter, pushing the cart along.

"Do you not think I can manage it?" His body language shifting drastically as he halts, giving me a nasty scowl.

There it is, that's the Nalfain I know.

"I didn’t say that. I just know you’re better with a blade than an ingredient list, okay? I'm sure you can mix ingredients and put them in the oven. Just plan on having me supervise the first time. Chill out, man." He huffs in frustration but keeps eyeing me as we leave the aisle.

"What?"

He doesn’t respond and just tugs at my coat. “What, Nalfain? Spit it out already!”

He sighs, "It insults me to admit this, but I have decided I should like us to fuck tonight, Bradley."

I exhale a dry laugh and stare a him, finding it hard to keep a straight face. An elderly lady walks by us just now, frowning with disapproval having definitely heard what he said. I cringe some and try to ignore her reaction all the same. Nal's deep brown eyes run over me with interest, "why do you behave as if you are embarrassed? I thought my body a reward to you."

"I'm not embarrassed Nal, it's just not polite to talk about certain things in public," I explain in lowered voice.

"So you do not want to fuck, then?" He questions loudly in a matter-of-fact tone. I then hear some hushed whispers and giggles erupt from two women at the edge of the next aisle over, and one is looking at Nal.

I groan and run my hand through my hair, "No, I mean yes! Yes, I do want to fuck. You just could've waited until we were in the car to ask, Nal, or at least been quieter about it!"

"Why?" He asks, twirling a loose strand of silky black hair with his finger.

Exasperation hits me; he has zero tact, absolutely no filter, and he always needs the “why” to every question. "Because, that’s just how it is Nalfain. Humans are obsessed with fucking each other, but they’re weird about discussing it in public, okay?" My voice hushed as I explain.

Nal shakes his head, “seems utterly dull, and ironic of them."

"eh, you're not wrong there," I shrug.

"Of course I'm not. Now come Bradley, I wish to leave at this instant, " Nal orders.

"Yes, leaving is the plan, but we gotta pay first! You know this." I sigh, pushing the cart past him. Nalfain bitches a bit under his breath but doesn't argue, trailing behind me like a dog on a leash. A leash really would be convenient with him, and it would be visually satisfying as well, but he'd never allow it.

I sigh, upset with the outright attraction I feel towards him. Nal does look good, too good. He's sort of taken a liking to athleisure, and lately won't wear anything but well-fitted black joggers, some trainers, white t-shirt, and a nice sweatshirt. At home he's usually naked or shirtless. It's like anything he puts on looks perfect, hair included, and it's annoying. More than annoying though, it's plain ironic because he's such an asshole. Then again, I eat people so maybe I'm an asshole too.

"I wish to browse alone," Nal pipes up.

I turn around and furrow my brow, "why? We're literally about to check-out and leave, just like you wanted."

"Because."

"That's not a reason Nal, the answers no." I affirm, shaking my head. "Come on, the longer we linger here the less free time we get at home."

I hear him bitch more under his breath, kicking the back of my leg in retaliation. I groan and take a few deep breaths, otherwise I'm gonna cave his face in. "Nalfain, don't fucking start with me."

"I wish to be alone! I am not your dog, you think it impossible for me to walk alone? I am more than capable." He pouts, shoving his hands in his sweatshirt pocket.

Ugh. He’s guilt tripping me now? Unbelievable. "I can't trust you dude, you're terrible at keeping a low profile and you suck at-" I pause to lower my voice, "-acting human..."

Nalfain rolls his eyes a huffs in frustration. "May I at least walk to the vehicle myself? Surely I can do that.”

A tired sigh leaves me, and for some reason against my better judgement, I agree. I do keep him on a tight leash, and I'm sure he gets antsy never leaving the apartment, but he's just so volatile, who can blame me?

"Fine, but you walk directly there and don't speak to anybody, understood? We'll call it a test of your obedience. If you fail, I will literally put you on a leash next time, I’m not even fucking with you.”

Nalfain gives me a toothy grin, "yeah, yeah okay. The keys, Bradley."

"Absolutely not."

"It is cold! Do you wish me to freeze? You know I cannot stand the cold!" I just shrug, smirking at him in silence. Anger flashes across his face and he changes his tone markedly, "Perhaps I can give you a snack at home, in exchange for the keys...and I shall be very obedient."

He's trying to bribe me, and I loathe that it's working. He know's I wanna fuck him and drink his blood. Goddamnit.

"Fucking fine," I snap, tossing the keys over. "Don't fucking do anything, don't talk to anyone, just sit your ass in the car and wait for me. I'll be right behind you. Am I understood?"

He just gives me a naughty smirk, "yes sir." Then turns on his heel, headed straight for the exit. I get in the checkout line, anxiety flooding me over the stupidity of what I've just done.

I just let my feral dog off-leash.