Chapter Five: Not Enough
Estelle
The moment the minute hand of the clock strikes 12, I let out a deep sigh. It's not a moment of relief for me but a moment of frustration. It just means that it's already 8 p.m. and it's time for me to clock out for my shift at this café. With that, I told Boss Jeremy, Café Estella's manager, that I would be heading out already. Moreover, Sophie is already waving at me outside the glass door with a silly face, like a child telling her mom to hurry up or else she'll do something more embarrassing.
She should stop that, she's creeping out the customers.
"Alright. See you tomorrow, owner," Boss Jeremy teased. I just rolled my eyes and bid him goodbye and my two other coworkers as I walked out.
He calls me 'Owner' because of the similarities of this Café's name and mine. Other customers sometimes mistook me for being the owner or the owner's child since we had our tag name on our shirts.
"Oh, Estelle. By the way, maybe starting next week my nephew would take over my position temporarily," he said as he approached me who was about to grab the handle. I looked back at him with a confused look.
"Why is that boss?"
"I will go on vacation with my family since it's the only time when the kids are free. Academic break, y'know. So, I'm taking it as an opportunity. Since I won't be here in the following days also, I'm telling you in advance already. I know that you really love working here and that I am just hoping that the two of you can get along." He gently scratched his head and faked a laugh. With that look of his, I'm sure that the so-called niece of him is a handful to handle.
"Of course, boss. But this nephew of yours, he's a troublemaker?" I teased and with that, his shoulders drooped down and he whispered something to me.
"Worse. He's a leader of a gang." I looked at my boss with despair and dropped my jaw.
Not just an ordinary troublemaker? A leader at that?!
"Don't worry, he doesn't hit girls and despite that, he's a good businessman and makes high-quality coffee and latte. He used to help here but eventually quit because he got bored."
"Thanks for the assurance," I said in a low voice and went out already. I heard him say 'welcome' to me but I wasn't able to acknowledge it because Sophie already jumped at me placed her right hand on my shoulder and started talking about how her date went with another guy. I lost count of the boys that he dated so this time, I didn't bother to remember their names anymore.
"By the way girl, your complexion is starting to get better already. Have you been sleeping well?" Sophie said while also staring at my face while walking.
"I guess so? I just feel amazing." I shrugged.
Not only did I sleep well these past few days but my body feels so light as if I became so healthy in just a snap. Is it because I really did have a good night's sleep or is it some side effects of the pill also?
Speaking of it, I also realized some things these past few nights while I was entering that world once I closed my eyes.
First, whatever I do in that dimension doesn't have any effect on my original body. I tested it out by secretly slicing my palm a little bit and when I woke up in my original body, I didn't feel any pain at all and of course, there were no traces of what I did also.
Second, I woke up at the place where I remembered my body was resting in the same clothes and position that I also last used. I think that was a good thing because I can't afford to destroy another tent and pay an additional 76 rias which was considered a large amount here. Though with this, I wonder if my body in that dimension would disappear if I woke up here or if that body would be like an empty shell. No soul at all.
Last, the timeline of that world is much alike the timeline of this world. If it's nighttime here, it's nighttime there also, and vice versa. The only thing that I noticed was the people;'s features, cultures, and those fantasy-alike things that I can't explain.
Can't believe I have seen an elf in person which is just a mythical creature in the books that I read when I was once a child.
This is why I consider that world to be a different dimension. A parallel universe in which I can go to whenever I swallow that pill before sleeping.
"Hey, watch where you're going!" I was taken back to reality when someone accidentally brushed my shoulder and Sophie shouted. "Geez, we almost lost our balance and hit the ground."
"S-Sorry," the lady said and looked at us before bowing. When she raised her head, our eyes met and that made my eyes grow bigger.
This tall and slender figure, the long black, the supermodel's face... even though she is sweating and it seems as though she is in a hurry because before I can utter a word, she started running away again, I am sure that she's the one who gave me the jar of sleeping pills. The witch!
"Do you know her?" Sophie asked and tilted her head. I blinked my eyes rapidly and touched my nape.
"S-She just seems familiar. Maybe a classmate from a different course?" I lied and since Sophie just asked it out of curiosity, she just shrugged his shoulders and continued talking about her date.
Sometimes, it's great that she would tell me all that stuff since I feel like experiencing also those things that she tells me. She's also the reason why I don't want a man to myself. Sophie makes it look like it's too much work and she'll deal that matter for the both of us.
"Your father was looking for you ma'am, he's on his study."
As soon as I arrived, one of our helpers in the house told me about that so I hurriedly went to my father's study.
A man in his late 40s with visible strands of gray hair went visible to me as soon as I opened the door. As usual, he looks so well respected and poised while reading some of his documents. That scent of efficascent oil reached my nose when I was almost four feet away from him.
"Dad, you called for me—"
"I'm very disappointed, Carla Estelle." Using his firm and authoritative voice, he cut my sentence. That same voice when he deals with his clients as a lawyer is the same voice he used to me every time I did something I should not based on their expectations.
"I'm sorry." My quick and always response. I bowed my head and clenched my jaw.
I know this day will come again and I am prepared for it so why do I still feel unsettled? He didn't say anything for almost a minute and it made my breathing more shallow and the tension between us build up more intensely.
"Does working part-time there doesn't satisfy you anymore? Instead of spending your academic break doing some advanced studies for your lesson, you chose to work at that café regularly. How much more are you going to disappoint us?" This time, his voice already sounded angry even though he was not raising it. My hands started shaking.
It's always like this, it'll be fine.
"I maintained my grades. I also did well this semester—"
"Not enough. For once in your life, aim high Carla. You didn't pursue law like I've told you nor a business degree to handle your mother's business. We let you pick a medical degree because that's what you want and you told us that you would do your best and then this?! Working at the café? What good will that bring you? Will you serve a patient's coffee in the future, huh? Is that what you want?"
Working in that café gave me a lot of benefits, especially for my mental health. But that is not something that I can say to my parents.
A slam on his table made the tears that I had been holding back, run down to my cheek. I slowly clenched my fists and fixated my gaze on the wooden-style tiles of this house. Using my peripheral vision, even though it's blurry, I saw my mom entering the study and went to my dad's side.
She was rubbing his back instead of mine. As always.
"Go," I heard my mom and that was my cue to exit the study but before that, I heard my dad say something to her.
"If only she were a boy. She won't be that stupid." Those words cut to my bone. It was not my first time hearing those yet I still feel the same every time I heard it from my father's mouth. I feel miserable.
I went back to my room and cried my heart out. I didn't care if some of the helpers would continually come back and forth to my room to serve me dinner. I didn't talk to them. I ignored them until they eventually stopped.
If Nana is still alive, she will know the right words to say to me.
I reached out to the jar of pills beside my table. I want to rest. I want to have a good night's sleep. I want an escape.
I still have 20 pills left in this jar. If one night is equivalent to one night with me having a good night's rest, then if I swallow all of them in just one go... will I be able to stay in that dimension for 20 days too?
"Haha," I chuckled. Am I losing my mind? "But if I try, I won't have any regrets..."
And with that, a tiny yet comforting sound of something that dropped on the floor reached my ear. It was the empty jar.
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