I wouldn’t say that I am depressed. I wouldn’t say that I have lived a terrible life. I wouldn’t say that I haven’t had every opportunity and then some, because all of those would be a lie. I have been given all the opportunities in the world, some that I don’t know if I even deserved. I mean, of course I know how this could turn out and I’m not sure if what I want is how I feel but what I do know is there’s no way this is going to just happen the way it does. There’s only ONE flaw in my life that kind of just sucks.
When it comes to love, I can’t say that I have any luck with that. Every person that I have dated as turned their back on me because I didn’t give them what they wanted. I couldn’t understand that at all because I was doing everything in my power to just make sure that they were happy and that I would end up liking them and maybe one day falling in love.
I should have known that love wouldn’t be such an easy thing to deal with. Especially after everything that I have been through so far with it. I’ve dealt with psychos, stalkers, playboys, and much, much more. I don’t know why I put up with it but at least point now that I’m a senior, I’m not going to date anyone this year. I can’t. I don’t want to get my heart broken once again.
Last year without my friends knowing, I dated a boy that they would not have approved of. He didn’t go to our school; he was actually someone of the middle-class section. We had met by chance, and I just immediately took a liking to him. I didn’t know how bad it would end up for me until it was too late. He seemed to like me, and we seemed to get along very well. I thought that I would be able to introduce him to everyone that I cared about but when it came down to it, he stabbed me in the back.
I remember seeing him laughing in my face, giving me such an ugly look that told me everything that I needed to know. I thought that he felt the same way about me, but I was more than just a little mistaken. He just wanted to know what it would be like to be with someone like me, a person from an elite family who goes to a school that looks down on commoners. I remember the satisfaction of my fist connecting with his face, but nothing could have compared to the brokenness of my heart.
There was nothing that I could do and nothing I would be able to think. I had to hide that pain though, I couldn’t let anyone know what I was feeling or thinking because I knew it would do nothing. I knew that it would bring nothing short of a burden and I keep thinking that maybe this is going to fade with time. It did, a dull ache that I would forever remember but I wouldn’t dare think about anything else. I know for a fact that I couldn’t let this happen the way that it does because I wouldn’t be able to do anything about it anymore. I hate that this has happened to me. There’s just nothing that I could do about it though.
I have my best friends, Sebastian, Leo, Tristan, and Alexi. We have been friends long before we started the Academy, our families having known one another. I trust them more than I have ever trusted someone before, and I have to ask myself how much faith I have had in them… I know what others have done to me and I’m not so quick to trust someone again.
They are the only people that I trust. The only people who would do such a thing to me. I know that we have been through a lot, and I know for a fact that I’m the one person they can trust as well. I love them like they are family and I know for a fact that I’m not going to let anything bring us down. It’s probably why I was so hesitant to realize that we would be dealing with the commoner as a roommate.
“Are you sure this is a good idea, Alexi?” I ask him since he is the one who specifically asked for the commoner to be our roommate, “I don’t think it’s a good idea at all.”
“Oh, I know what happened with the last guy, but I think this time it is going to be a lot differently.” Alexi assures me, a sadistic smile on his face, “I think this plaything might actually last us. I was kind of worried that he would end up rejecting the proposal when he learned what happened to the last guy, but he didn’t seem like he wanted to hold himself back. I think he might end up being everything that we have been waiting for. The toys here have been getting boring.”
Every now and then, we find someone to play with until we get bored with them. Whether it is sexually or not, they don’t last long because they make it very clear that they were of the same social class. Obviously, we ended up knocking them down a few notches because they wanted to think that were up to our standard and could take us down, but they quickly learned what would happen if they stood in our way. I can’t tell how many of them had to flee the Academy because they couldn’t face us again.
“I hope you’re right because I’m getting tired of our little things.” Tristan grumbles, rolling his eyes as he shakes his head, “and Kai has been getting on my ever-lasting nerve. I don’t know why he thinks that I’m interested in him just because we’ve done a few things. It makes me frustrated to think that I would date someone like him. He and his brother get on my nerves.”
“Thinking of his brother, Adam has been asking me a lot of questions about our new pet.” Alexi tells us, making me wonder what is going on because Adam has never been interested in someone else before, “I didn’t tell him much because he didn’t need to know it, but I have this feeling that he’s going to try some kind of bullshit. Of course, we know how to handle him and everything, but I’m worried what might end up happening if we’re not careful. Don’t you think?”
“I think we can handle Adam if he tries some bullshit.” Leo murmurs, a dangerous glint in his eyes that tells me what he might end up doing to him if Adam stands in our way, “besides, I’m getting curious about our little pet. He better hope that he can handle us.”
I don’t know how anyone can handle us; his words just make me roll my eyes. I know what I have been through, the eldest child of an elite lawyer and doctor, but I don’t think anything could have prepared me for what was going to come next. Of course, I thought that things would turn out a different way, but I knew that meeting the new kid was going to change my perspective on everything… I don’t believe in love anymore, but of course things just couldn’t work out the way I needed it to.
I just pray that this doesn’t bite me in the ass.
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