Void

 

Nothingness, again.  

An eon later, give or take. 

How long has it been since... Thought? 

Has it finally come, or has it always been this way?

The end? 

No... Before... But not now. There’s no absolute nothingness, not anymore.  

Slipping through the void towards the only perceivable thing, that single luminous pixel which enticingly burns. Attractively beckoning, it draws me closer, or do I have some control? Curiosity persists, I must see what it is. For it truly is all that there is. Approaching the dot at an inconceivable speed, if that concept exists anymore, the speck grows magnitudes larger.

Am I the hunter or prey? It was so far away, yet now that lone source of expanding light entrances me... Entices me... Much too late realizing that there is no escape. Its glorious radiance magnifies as the orb swells beyond peripheral vision and all comprehension. Consuming the nothing, it becomes my everything.  

With all love and hate, it embraces me. 

Feeling the star’s hunger, it reaches out with tendrils of plasma to restrain and devour all. Bracing for the pain but feeling none, the plasma passes harmlessly through me. I’m still nothing and have zero to incinerate or offer. This foreboding feeling of emptiness must not remain when all of this is here. 

Starvation and hunger are born.

Seizing onto the plasma bands with unimaginable forces before ripping the star’s essence out with created or imagined tendrils, and then slurping them into my void like the ramen noodles enjoyed in life. I have been starving for something, anything to fill the vast emptiness. This star won't escape my boundless appetite. It is helpless. 

I have embraced the star.  

I have consumed it.  

I need more. 

…And then, Clarity. 

A dream? 

No, it’s something else.

The ecstasy of breath.

Leaves brush against my scaled hide which reflects various shades of green and brown. The world seems so new, so different. Racing quickly through the underbrush then pausing before flicking my tongue to taste the air.

Have I always been this lizard, too?

Dread washes over me after tasting an unfriendly presence in the air. Instinctually leaping onto the nearby fractured cobblestone path. It has been cluttered with vines and stones meant to entangle and trip me. I am determined to not let them slow me down. The unknown predator inspires intense fear but also inspires the desire to endure.

The collapsed building ahead offers solace, there must be many places to hide within. Darting through the underbrush and leaping onto the wall, strong claws find purchase allowing effortless skittering up its surface towards safety.  

Crack. 

Pain and fear, and then nothing. 

No, that star once again.

Without pain, the fear is gone.

Wait.

Returning.

Watching from afar, my… Those reptilian feet lose their hold on the wall while its lengthy body plummets into the bushes. Have I felt that before? That experience? That feeling quickly flees. I must hold onto that sensation, for here there is nothing else.

The creature's life, all of its experience are recorded within the bands of mana, for what purpose. There may not be one. Not even I know. Wait, why would I?

This dream feels so… Real.

Desire surges withing. I need more.

Seeking this feeling, not even sure what it is or what to do. I force consciousness back into the lizard, if but for a moment. Absorbed again by the dying creature, the ground moves slowly by. Hoisted over its broad shoulders. The predator has a firm hold on our back and tail. There will be no escape. Unable to maintain being the lizard, the sensation fades returning me to nothing. 

Unsatisfied.

That horrible feeling. There it is, again.

No! I need more… I need to feel it again.  

But it is dead.

My grasp on the host is gone. Now ascending above this strange and yet familiar world.  With haste I speed above the landscape, returning to the maw of the August Dragon, the Prime Nexus, to offer these experiences. Speeding through the meadow of life, rife with exotic flowers. Like all life, they offer support to some and death to others. The radiant mana swirls up into the nexus at the center.

The Dragon beckons. 

The maw welcomes. 

Consumed. 

Convergence. 

Immediately feeling all experiences, the pain, hate, caring, and desire... Everything gathered throughout life’s journey, taken. Ultimate ecstasy felt as I’m being eviscerated by the Dragon’s infinite teeth. 

From the Dragon, new packets of us are reborn and cleansed, then released to nourish the world for future harvest. Yet there is something more to us. Something withheld. Maintaining some semblance of control. I want more.

Desperately wanting to be. 

“You’ve come all this way. What are you?”