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Till Death Part I

Chapter 2 Part 4

Chapter 2 Part 4

May 17, 2024

This content is intended for mature audiences for the following reasons.

  • •  Abuse - Physical and/or Emotional
  • •  Mental Health Topics
  • •  Physical violence
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Adon’s mouth fell open as he turned to Lu, unable to imagine forgetting Aphy or Mess, as if they’d let him. The thought was so ridiculous, that he laughed, clapping a wide-eyed hand over his mouth, “sorry.”

“No, you can laugh,” Lu nodded, biting back his own smile, proud of making Adon relax.

“How old is your brother?” Lu jostled into Adon as their car shifted tracks.

“Nine—ten, almost ten.”

Lu did the math, “you took guardianship when he was three?”

Adon shrugged, he’d never considered it a choice. “I’m a minor guardian until I get my adult ID, so we have an ARC worker. Her name’s Heather, and she checks in on us now and then. She’s not very helpful, but she’s always there when we need her for the legal stuff, so she’s good enough.” Adon didn’t want to talk about his family anymore. He felt enough pressure to ace his exam without being reminded about all the reasons why. He tried to change the topic, glancing at his phone, surprised to see only ten minutes had passed and they were nearly to Chroma, with plenty of extra time to get lost. “What about you? When’s your birthday?”

Lu smiled, “end of the rains, I’m an ice baby.”

Adon laughed as the car slowed, approaching the busy Chrome Transport Station. 

Lu stood, pulling Adon upright, fixing his hair and collar, “you can do this. Ten whole spots, easy.”

Adon smiled, nodding, “I can do this.”

They exited the car, Lu dragging Adon to the right when he almost went left, following the navigator on his fancy phone. “I’ll get you there,” Lu called behind him, gripping Adon’s hand, “you check in on Aphro and Mess, or else you won’t stop thinking about it inside.”

Adon blushed, letting Lu wind them through the halls and crowded skywalks through busy gravity tunnels, loading the map on his new hand-me-down phone from Lu, relaxing at the sight of Aphro and Mess’ dots together at the cafe she’d been going to, safe and close to home if the rain sirens turned into emergency evacs.

“Here we are,” Lu gestured to the shining CAPT building, offering Adon a bottle of water, two pens, and brand new stylus, then taking Adon’s bag from his shoulder. 

They approached the security booth at the gate and a large woman barked through the tinny speaker at them from behind the glass “scan your ID.”

Lu held Adon’s bag out to him for the keychain, but Adon pulled a pendant necklace from beneath his uniform, scanning it below the green laser. He nodded at the keychain with a smile, “that’s my district alert, it just reports the warnings. This has my ID chip in it.”

“Oh,” Lu frowned.

“Try again,” the woman sighed, “cards work better.”

“Oh, sure,” Adon tried not to feel embarrassed as he rifled through his bag on Lu’s shoulder, pulling out his ID card, scanning it successfully, and replacing it, his nerves making his hands sweat.

“Says you’re unclaimed,” she frowned, “I need a guardian.”

Adon nodded, used to the deman, “ward of Heather, district: Indigo.”

“Yes, honey, I see all that, I need a sign. Are you here for Military Recruitment or Labor Force Training?”

“Scholarship,” Adon recited for the millionth time. The Grounders who were smart enough for scholarships usually found a decent enough family to adopt them, but they often didn’t have two siblings they demanded to bring along, so like in all other ways, Adon was an unexpected exception. 

“Oh, got it,” the woman shifted in her chair, tapping around on her screen, apologetic and embarrassed by her own assumptions, then grimacing tightly as she pulled up a new page with the same problem, “it still says you’re unclaimed. Who do you belong to?”

“Caldera,” Adon repeated, his frustration growing with each passing second he wasn’t inside setting the room controls of his testing cube and getting as comfortable as the kids who’d been there for hours.

“I understand, kid. But you have to be claimed or I can’t let you in.” She pointed to her screen helplessly, “without an identified individual, it’s unsafe.”

“Unsafe?” Adon was about ready to punch the tiny speaker. He’d followed every rule provided, reported to every office, filed every form, attended every prep meeting, and no one had said anything about claiming or identification or what to do if the Sec-Off won’t let you in.

Lu squinted at his phone, scrolling down the last of the article he’d been reading, his hand hovering in front of him as he took in the information, then shooting into the air, stepping around Adon, “me! I’m claiming.” He pushed his phone to Adon’s chest and stepped to the window, scanning his band and signing on the screen prompt, following the woman’s directions. 

Adon blinked at the article, scrolling until he caught the section Lu had been reading:

All CAPT testers must arrive with a claimant responsible for post-test care, including hydration, nutrition, orderly stress care, asylum prescriptions, and transport of tester back to district. Common claimants include: guardians—

“Alright, you’re all set to wait in the claims sector Mr. Bird.” The woman gestured to her left where a small garden path led to a skylight lounge for waiting guardians.

Adon glanced up, handing Lu back his phone dazedly. Lu took Adon’s phone and ID pendant, bracing Adon’s shoulders and holding his gaze proudly, “you can do this. Top ten is easy for a pretty boy like you.” He smiled at the red flush climbing Adon’s ears, shaking him excitedly, “you’ve even seen a real apple. Bet they haven’t.” He nodded toward the windowless testing center. 

“Mr. Adonis Caldera, please proceed through the detector, removing any non-approved devices.”

That was enough to draw Adon’s attention away from the lingering fear that he wouldn’t get in. He snorted at Lu and stepped through the detector, waiting for the arm of the gate to lift and let him in after spitting out his temporary Test ID.

“I’ll be waiting,” Lu called.

Adon waved brightly, stepping backwards through the gate and disappearing into the test center. First, he passed through the disinfectant hall, then into the changing room where his clothes were folded into the locker with his test ID number on it. He climbed into the crisp white uniform, grateful he’d confirmed with Heather that he was allowed to keep his own underwear on, since the rules on the wall were dense and confusing, no wonder kids arrived so early. After clearing the x-ray scanner that checked for hidden devices, he was directed to follow a line of blue lights on the floor, leading him through the maze of halls, ending at a blue doorway where a small cubed chamber waited for him. There was a camera in the corner, a small chute that would deliver the allotted and requested snacks the wealthy could afford, and a chair that measured his vitals as practice questions flashed in front of him and he answered by the remote that would be waiting for him or with the stylus he was expected to bring himself. Adon made himself comfortable, strapped in and confirmed with the passing proctor, then waited for the test to begin.

☆

 Lu bounced his leg nonstop. Hours passed. He watched Aphro and Mess return home on Aon’s phone, silenced an alert about Navy, wondered if Chrome had any hazards, then drifted back to thoughts of Adon suffering in the testing room and waited. 

He watched parents shower children with praise, friends pop open drinks and cheers to their completion on the steps outside the testing center. One girl collapsed, a boy was escorted out on a stretcher, and he listened to the twitter of disapproval that confirmed students who couldn’t make it through the CAPT were brought through a single-use tunnel to the hospital where their guardians were sent to fetch them. When they called for Lu Bird over the intercom, he wasn’t sure what to expect. 

He met a wobbly Adon, slap happy to the point of drunkenness, his brain thoroughly fried. Lu swallowed his nerves for his own test— he didn’t have to make top ten percent, and he did not recite the greeting of a million guardians before him with a how’d it go?  Instead, he stooped and pulled Adon onto his back, and walked them easily to the train, tracking a private car to Indigo and following the GPS marker on Adon’s phone toward home, then Adon’s grunting directions when that didn’t work. Once they made it to the main terminal, however, Lu was on his own, partially because Adon didn’t know his way from the private rail drop, but mostly because Adon was asleep on his back and Lu refused to wake him. 

Adon stopped at a vending cart and ordered four hot chocolates and a cake, stooping to scan his ID band to transfer the credits without a second thought, and holding out his hand for the bag the vendor offered. The old man smiled at them and placed the handles in Lu’s palm, patting his shoulder and telling him he was a great brother. Lu frowned but said nothing, thanking the man and following signs for the covered walks Adon would take from the main transport system, reaching them just as the rain began pouring into the lower districts, the flood lines fully opened, sirens and alerts jerking Adon awake. 

Lu laughed, tapping Adon’s grip around his throat so he could breathe. 

“Sorry,” Adon settled quietly back on Lu’s shoulder, “I can walk, aren’t you tired?”

Lu shook his head, for once he felt Benny’s workouts had a purpose, Pa’s brutal instruction to fight Phaios or the uncles, it was worth it if he could— Adon was already back asleep, despite the flashing lights and alarms reminding the lower levels why they were called the Wells.

Adon pointed snoring directions and Mess opened the door when Lu knocked anxiously. 

Lu exhaled his relief at the familiar face as Messenger held their unit door open, gesturing to the simple studio and letting Lu pass, pointing him toward the single bed and muting the TV that wasn’t connected to an AIE system. Aphy was nowhere in sight, her district alert badge on the counter. Adon would be upset if he noticed. 

The rain sirens roared again as the pounding continued and the Ground levels bunkered down to endure the beginning of the rainy season. Lu slid the homemade curtain over the only window, but it did little to block out the roaming red beams. 

“Guess you’re staying,” Mess shrugged, handing Lu a glass of water. 

Lu sniffed it and hid his frown. It smelled swampy. The whole unit smelled… wet. Like someone had vacuumed the training room and showers of the Flock hall of Pa’s mansion and sprayed the dust onto the walls. Lu forced himself to breathe normally, sure the smell would go away after he got used to it. He cheersed Mess’ outstretched cup, “I brought cake…. To celebrate.”

Mess brightened “then you’re definitely staying.” 

Lu watched the boy chew his lip the same way Adon did when he was thinking hard, staring at his brother curled small on their bed. “What’s wrong?” Lu felt obligated to be the adult, “do you have homework you need to ask about?”

“No,” Mess shook his head, curly hair flopping over his face. He pushed his hair back irritably, :”is the CAPT really that hard?” He nervously surveyed his exhausted brother, usually untouchable.

“No,” Lu laughed, ruffling his hair, “Adon’s just really good at it, so they made his harder.”

Mess tsked, shaking his head forlornly as he tied his bangs on top of his head, “pretty and smart? How am I supposed to follow that?”

Lu barked a laugh at the unexpected comparison. 

“Shhh,” Mess scolded, distracted by promises of cake and snooping through the bag Lu had set on the low table. “What’s this?” He asked in a loud whisper, holding up one of the steaming cups.

“Hot chocolate,” Lu whispered back, sitting across from Mess on the floor, looking over the homework spread across the table. He heaved himself up and took the cake to the counter, cutting it after following Mess’ directions to plates and knives, confused by so many mix-matched utensils. He returned to his cocoa, Mess’ already half gone, and set the cake in front of him, flipping through the piles of bills and fee notices on the table absently. 

Mess took a greedy bite of cake, melting his back against the couch. He glanced guiltily toward Adon, “did he do well?”

Lu nodded, nibbling his own cake, “probably.”

Mess smiled and shoved another bite into his mouth, “he wanted to do well for us. Top ten and he said we wouldn’t have to worry again.”

Lu nodded, snorting to himself at the adult conversation he was having with an actual child. He snooped through the papers, at least half of them fee notices for illegal Old Internet music downloads with Adon’s ID number, but they must be Aphy’s. He’d never even seen Adon wearing headphones, let alone a headset. “Where’s your sister?”

Mess straightened, zipping his lips, “dunno.”

“You actually don’t know and I should go find her before Adon wakes up because her alert’s on the table and the rains are dangerous, or she told you to keep it secret and is fine?”

Messenger gaped at him, “how’d you know?”

Lu scoffed, “what do you mean how’d I know, you just zipped your lips and locked them yourself.” He repeated Mess’ gesture, throwing the imaginary key at Mess.

“That’s what that means?” Mess repeated the sign, “zipping lips?” Mess sat back against the couch, astounded. 

Lu stifled his giggles, struggling to keep his voice to a whisper, “what did you think?” 

From the bed, Adon gained enough consciousness to smile at their laughter and the smell of warm chocolate before drifting back to sleep, hoping Lu would still be there in the morning. 

☆

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Till Death Part I
Till Death Part I

76 views25 subscribers

Character is often determined not by what we survive, but how. How long, and for who.

Lu is used to the cold distance of life in the Wells, a prince among vagrants. He tolerated the cold silence to avoid Pa's attention as long as he could. But when Lu meets Adon, he can't look away. He begins to thaw and wonder what a future made of his own choices might look like.

Adon is warm. Adon has to be warm. As soon as he lets the pressures of poverty close in around him, he'll break. And if he breaks, how will he get his brother and sister out of the Wells? But he can only hold on so long, and he's slipping. It's Lu who reaches out, it’s Lu who grabs his hand, and it’s Lu who says he doesn’t have to be so warm.

How will they survive in a world that already has places for them? How long will they believe in their future together, and how big will they dream before the cruel demands of those around them finally break through their naive optimism?

Content Warnings:
This is a story of trauma recovery, some of it based on my own experiences, some of the friend I started writing it for, some adjacent but fictional. Healing traumas can be a humiliating experience, full of grief and hopelessness, guilt, and learning to regularly forgive our worst selves for the choices we made then. That growth is hard, and we often get wrapped in the pain like a comfort blanket, a defining structure of our identities, devouring our agency as choices are made for us, life moves around us, and we slowly lose the ability to stand up. This story includes depictions of violence, abuse, manipulation, depression, and mental instability as our protagonists work their way back to each other and regain the hope and courage to become the people they want to be now.

Standard warnings for the entire series include: violence, death, suicidal thoughts (non-ideation), depression, isolation, murder.
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Chapter 2 Part 4

Chapter 2 Part 4

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