Sapnap: Dream and George are getting married lol
Bad: WHAT
Bad: OMG SINCE WHEN
Sapnap: Lmaoooooo since a year ago. You are so late.
Bad: O.o
Bad: Dream and George are together? Forreal?
Watching Bad freak out over Dream and I getting married was the most form of communication I had gotten in hours, and I wasn't even texting back.
Sapnap: No, they're trying to get George his green card. I'm a witness for their wedding, but they need another one.
Sapnap: You available anytime within the next 70 days?
I waited for Bad's response. He kept typing and stopping, typing and stopping. The three dots disappeared and reappeared about four times before he sent his reply.
Bad: AWW OF COURSE!!! I'd be honored!
I sighed in relief despite already knowing Bad would be coming. There was just that tiny little thought in my brain the size of an atom reminding me of the 0.1% chance of Bad saying no that wouldn't stop pestering me. But now it had dissipated.
But he sent another message.
Bad: Can Skeppy come?
Dream: No.
Dream : This needs to stay between us. You can't tell anybody, okay?
Bad: :(
Bad: Okay :3
I put my phone down after that and spun Dream's gamer chair around to face the window, and when my phone buzzed, I didn't even bother to read it. The sun had risen to the highest degree it could. It could only go down from there.
Dream had been attached to Sapnap since our little argument. I knew it wasn't a big deal. All I was wondering was why his parents couldn't know. It was a reasonable question, right? They're inevitably going to find out anyway. Might as well tell them as soon as possible. By now, I was sure he was over it. He moved on from conflict faster than anyone I knew. We had arguments before, and it was always him that moved on first. He'd usually just message me a funny picture he found and laugh about it like nothing happened.
This time shouldn't be any different. It had been a few hours now. I bet he and Sapnap were watching a movie without me downstairs, and they were laughing and having the time of their life as if nothing even happened this morning.
So why was it so hard for me to just go down there and sit with them? I had this deep seated feeling in my stomach. Something that wouldn't go away no matter what. I tried adjusting the way I was sitting but it didn't change anything. It wasn't like it hurt or anything. It was more of a sensation. A tingly sensation that only made me ever feel bad. Like I did something wrong.
But I didn't. I had to remember that. It was a fair question. I didn't mean to upset him.
But I still did, and that was the issue.
I sank farther down in the seat before slinking down and out of the chair entirely. I had to talk to them. It was eating away at me like a parasite. I didn't think I'd care so much about apologizing, especially when I did nothing wrong.
But I kind of missed him.
I swallowed my pride, but it went down like a rock. I didn't do anything wrong, I was just going to apologize to move on. Just so he thinks I accept that what I did was wrong.
Each step was like dragging two anvils behind me, and I kept having voices in my head telling me to just go back and make Dream come to me.
But I waited three hours, he was not coming up.
With each step down the stairs, my brain kept yelling at me to turn around and go back upstairs and wait. Our conflicts usually resolved naturally. Neither of us ever had to apologize. We just moved on without ever bringing it up again. But this time felt different. More deep. Something more serious than scamming one another on a video call.
When I reached the last step, I leaned over to see Dream and Sapnap talking on the couch, similar to my first night there. Except they sat on opposite sides of the couch this time."I don't know anymore, man," I heard Dream say. "It's too hard."
"You just gotta put it aside, dud. Do it for George. That's why we're all here in the first place."
I entered the room, and Sapnap looked at me with wide eyes.
"How long have you been there?" He asked, causing Dream to jump and jerk around to look at me. I could see the red in his eyes.
“Just got here," I replied. "If you're wondering, I didn't hear anything."
Both boys relaxed. Deep down I wanted to know the context of the very little I did hear, but I knew best not to ask. It most likely wasn't my business, anyway.
"Have you been crying?" I asked, and Dream very un-subtly wiped his eyes.
"No."
Well that was a shot to the heart. I never even heard the man cry let alone see it.
"I didn't mean to upset you," I said. "I was just wondering."
He waved it off, although he wouldn't meet my eyes. "You're fine. It's not your fault. Honestly, it's mine. I overreacted."
"Why are you crying?" I couldn't help but ask, sitting down on the coffee table in front of them. He laughed and rubbed his eyes again.
"I'm not."
I looked to Sapnap, and he shook his head. "I'm sorry," I spewed faster than I could think. "I don't care if it was your fault, okay? I'm taking the fall this time."
"You don't have to," He said.
"I will anyway, okay? You seem really hurt. I didn't mean to upset you. If I knew asking would, I would never have asked." I wish I knew why, but it didn't look like he was going to tell.
"Glad we settled it then," Sapnap said with a smile, kicking his feet up on the coffee table.
It didn't feel very settled. It didn't have the same satisfying ending all our other arguments had. It was like singing a song and just stopping in the middle of a line. Or pausing a movie in the middle of the action. Or taking a break from a book in the middle of the chapter.
Something told me this was not over.
But I didn't get much time to think as they both got up to their feet.
Dream said, "We better get ready. Bad's going to be here for dinner."
***
The argument of who was the tallest in the Dream Team was no contest. We had settled it before even meeting in person. Nobody could beat Dream when he said he was an absolute giant, and nobody was going to try and detest his claims. But who was the shortest was a different question. Suddenly claims got questioned and measurements were requested. Sapnap claimed himself to be 5'10, I was 5'9. Obviously I had a hard time believing it. I admitted my height first, and it seemed pretty suspicious to me that he was only one inch taller than me.
But he was. We measured. But we had another person in question: Badboyhalo. He never admitted his height to us. All he said was that he was shorter than Dream but taller than Sapnap. And obviously, we called that into question as well.He was to be here any minute. The sun was beginning to set and brought a delicate warm hue down on the house and through the windows. It turned anything it touched just a tad bit lighter, and that included Dream's hair.
He laid draped over me and Sapnap's laps. His head was rested on mine and his body on his. He scrolled mindlessly through Tiktok, occasionally commenting on a post or two. His way of getting ready was showering and throwing his green sweater on with a pair of jeans identical to the rest of his other ones. Needless to say, his fashion taste was very uniform.
His hair glowed a honey color, and it fluffed up in all directions, including a bit over his eyes that were as bright as the stars. They looked to change color, although it was very subtle. Like it went from a dark green to a lighter one. I couldn't stop looking at them. I looked at them more than I looked at my phone. It was so pretty. And occasionally he'd chuckle at something he watched, and the corners of his eyes would wrinkle just a tiny bit.
His hair was so soft as I tousled it up even worse than it already was. I couldn't even help it. It was like sitting a child in front of a cake and expecting them not to eat some of the frosting. But he didn't seem to mind.
And then the doorbell rang, and like a pack of dogs, we all shot our heads to the door. Sapnap shoved Dream off of us and he hit the floor with a thud as Sapnap reached for the door.
"Finally! I won't be the third wheel anymore!" He joked.
"Oh come on, you're not the third wheel," Dream said as he got back up on his feet.
“Sure, Dream. Tell me that when your best friends are sleeping upstairs together and you're stuck on the couch with a stuffed Panda," Sapnap said as he twisted the doorknob. He grinned mischievously. "Moment of truth, George. Are you, or are you not, the shrimp of the Muffinteers?"
"I'm not. Bad's 4'10," I said, crossing my arms as I got to my feet.
He threw open the door. Yup, I'm the shrimp. He was only a few inches taller than Sapnap, but taller than the both of us nonetheless. The moment he saw Sapnap, he gasped and engulfed the shorter boy into a hug.
"I can't believe it! It's Sapnap!" He exclaimed. "Sappitus Nappitus! You're actually taller than I thought you'd be!"
Sapnap giggled and pulled away, "You're lankier than I expected."
"Hey Bad," Dream said with an awkward wave.
"Oh my Goodness, you're so handsome!" Bad grinned. I forgot this was his first time seeing Dream's face. He had to be around six foot as he was only inches shorter than Dream.
Dream chuckled nervously, rubbing the back of his neck as it turned increasingly more splotchy red.
"Aha thanks," He said.
"I'm serious, Dream! Why have you not used a facecam yet? I thought you looked like Shrek or something!"
"I dunno," He mumbled.
Bad turned to me, "Hi, George!" He hugged me.
"George is a shrimp!" Sapnap hollered. "It's confirmed now! Bad's taller than you!"
Bad shook his head with a smile, "That's not nice, Sapnap. George is actually the perfect height! He looks perfect the way he is, even if he isn't super tall." He patted the top of my head. That only made Sapnap laugh harder.
“Thanks, Bad," I mumbled.
“Okay, you guys have got to catch me up. How did this all happen?" He asked, collapsing down onto the couch.
"It was just a joke," I said. "A little after Dream left London, I told him we should get married so I could come to America." He looked to Dream, and he had a stupid grin on his face as he laughed. "Little did I know, he started researching right after."
"I thought you were serious," He said. "And you can't even say you don't want this when you were basically crying when your visa got approved."
My face flushed. "I did not."
"Oh yes you did! You called me at, like, eleven at night screeching about how you got approved," He laughed.
Oh, my God.
"Aw, that's sweet," Bad said with a soft smile. "What are you guys doing after George gets his green card? Are you guys gonna divorce?"
"Maybe. I think we can just stay married until one of us finds someone we actually want to marry." He looked to me.
I shrugged, "Whichever. Doesn't matter to me. We could easily just stay married and get all the benefits out of it."
"So you're cool with it? You're not going to tell us it's a bad idea or anything?" Dream asked.
I could see in Bad's eyes that he was thinking carefully. He clicked his tongue. "I think that you guys should do whatever feels right. Personally, I wouldn't do it, but I don't see an issue in it. You're best friends and you love each other very much. I think getting married would just bring you guys closer together."
Dream and I looked at eachother. I could see the pink in his cheeks and the red in his ears.
"I don't love him," I said, my throat clenching slightly as I looked back at Bad.
“Love doesn't always mean you love him like a boyfriend, George. You can love someone as a brother or as a friend."
"How can you tell the difference?" I couldn't help but ask. I tried focusing strictly on Bad's eyes, but I could feel Dream and Sapnap's beating stares.
He thought about it again for a moment. "Let me put it this way, you think of the three of us in the same way, right?" I didn't answer, and I was hoping it was a rhetorical question. "The way you feel about the three of us is a friendly love. You care about all of us very deeply, I just know it. But that's it. Being in love is deeper than that. You have a deep connection with them that you both can feel. If you were in love with one of us in this room, you'd be feeling it right now. It'd be a different kind of feeling that you either never had before, or only had, like, once or twice before."
"Oh." I bit my lip softly. The pounding in my ears only grew increasingly louder.
"I'm not saying you're in love with any of us," Bad quickly added. "I'm just saying that when you say I love you, it doesn't always mean you're in love with them. It just means you love them to a certain degree."
"I love you, Dream, to a certain degree," Sapnap said with a laugh.
"I love you, too, Sapnap," Dream laughed. "Only to a certain degree, of course."
I tried to laugh off the growing panic inside me. I pushed away all the thoughts that I had definitely been trying to avoid. It felt as if the spotlight was on me. That everyone was looking at me, trying to pry out the answer to their burning questions. And they burned, alright. I could feel it on my skin, in the deepest part of my core.
"I love you, George," Dream said with a grin.
I glanced up at his intimidating eyes and back down. His eyes looked just like Bad's, and yet looking into them brought an entirely different feeling in the pit of my stomach. Something warm yet jolting.
"To a certain degree, right?" I said.
His chuckle came out shaky, and he brought the rest of us into the kitchen without ever actually answering my question.
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