Opening the shower, I contemplated on my decision. Aside from a few leads, I hadn’t felt that sibling recognition at all. This would be even harder than I thought. Finn, whoever he was, didn’t seem to recognize me, either.
I lost track of how long I’d been taking a shower and dwindling in my thoughts, but my fingers clearly implied that it had been long enough for them to get wrinkled. Thinking that spending an entire hour in the bathroom might sound off, I’d finally went out and faced him again.
When I got out, I saw him searching for something on his desk. He made it even more chaotic than how it was a moment ago. As I was looking at him while drying my hair, he asked, “Are you a klepto?”
I almost dropped my towel. “A what?”
“Something is missing,” he paused, still looking at his things. “I placed it here...”
“You could have asked me if I had seen it, instead of calling me a thief.”
“Are you?” he asked, staring right at me.
“No!” I exclaimed. “And why are you even accusing me? Do you have a proof that I took whatever you were looking for?”
“I was just asking.”
“But it’s offensive.”
“If you’re guilty.”
“No, what you said was really offensive.” I shook my head. “I can’t believe that you’re like this. You’re even worse than what I’ve heard.”
“What have you heard?” he repeated.
“That you’re hard to get along with,” I said, obviously holding back most of what I had actually heard.
“And?”
“What and?”
“Surely, you must have heard that I’m gay,” KN bluffed, raising one of his eyebrows. “And I’m positive that you want to ask me about it right now.”
I coughed.
Did he just read my mind? Not sure what I should say, I ended up shrugging my shoulders, as if I didn’t know a thing, when obviously, it was the first thing I’d heard about him. However, he wasn’t convinced. I guessed the news was more popular than what I could ever imagine. Even the object of the rumor was fully aware of it.
“It doesn’t matter if you are or not.”
“Of course, that’s not the only thing you’ve heard of,” KN added, before going back to finding whatever he was searching for.
“But are you really gay?” I finally asked, unable to contain it anymore. We just had an argument, I knew, but I was dying with curiosity. And he was the one who had brought up the topic. I might as well clarify it as early as now. “I’m just asking, since we’ll be sharing the same room.”
“They said so.”
“But are you?”
He didn’t answer.
“So does that mean you like guys?” I slowly said, figuring him out.
“I don’t need to answer that,” he replied.
“Do you have a boyfriend?” I asked him again, not considering the fact that he seemed to be uninterested in my questions. I couldn’t help but be curious. It was hard to resist. An all-boys boarding school romance!
“What?” KN stared at me with utter skepticism.
“You know, if you have a…” I paused, wondering how I should say this. “…you know, a romantic involvement with—“
He sighed, a bit angrily. “I don’t like guys. If you’re nosy and worried about that, you can sleep in peace. I swear, I won’t touch you. That’s the last thing I ever want to happen.”
I wouldn’t want that, either.
“Um, then, could you possibly like girls?” I asked with extreme confusion.
“Nope,” KN grunted, continuing his search for the missing paper among the pile.
“Then who do you like?” I carried on.
“Myself,” KN simply replied.
“Yourself?” I echoed back.
“Yes,” he answered. “Do I need to explain that, too?”
“No.” I gave up. “It makes sense.”
He shrugged and somehow found what he was looking for. I hadn’t asked what it was, feeling that our conversation was already enough for the day. Getting up the wooden ladder to my bed, I heard him say, “I’ve been meaning to ask you...”
I looked at him, holding on to the last step. “What is it?”
“Did anyone tell you that you look like a girl?” he said in a matter-of-fact way. I nervously coughed, almost choking on my breath. Of all things to say, I wasn’t expecting that. Not from him, anyway.
“Who the hell gave you the idea?” I asked with a rough voice, trying to look chill and assertive too, for a change. Maybe all guys loved being cocky. Who knew?
“A lot of things,” he said. “And you look familiar. Have we seen each other before?”
“I don’t think so,” I replied. “If saying that you’re not interested in guys, and then throwing that punch line worked for you before, it doesn’t for me. Just turn off the lights when you’re finished with what you’re doing.”
Gosh, I could sound this cool?
I climbed up to my bed. I didn’t know why I said that, but it was the only way I could think of on how to avoid having the have-we-met-before conversation, which might end up with him identifying exactly where and when. That could probably lead to the ultimate revelation that I was a girl. After all, it was only this afternoon that I’d turned to a boy. So, for the most part of my existence, whether we’d met at the grocery or at the salon, I’d be a girl in that certain memory.
“I’m not hitting on you,” KN said, a bit irritated.
“Do you have a sister?” I suddenly asked.
“No,” he replied. “Why did you ask?”
“Then good night, Konstantino Nikolas,” I muttered. Maybe I could cross out his name from my list. A greater part of me didn’t want to believe that he was my brother. And he answered fast enough when I’d asked him if he had a sister, so he seemed to be telling the truth. But I guessed he could still stay on the list for a while until I was certain that he wasn’t faking everything. Like the way Finn did before entering Corner Stone High School.
One could never be too certain.
FINDING FINN JOURNAL NO. 5
I have my primary suspects! Hooray! And my roommate’s a weirdo.
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