Six months had gone by, and it was almost spring the following year. Mai hasn't attended school in about two weeks. Which was strange. Although I had no means to contact her, I knew where she lived because I had followed her home many times. The following day, I skipped school and went to locate her place. Even when she was ill, she always came to school, so I assumed she wasn't sick.

I caught a train to Naka-Meguro. That's the rail route we would always use to go to her neighborhood. That's what I recall. I headed out earlier than usual so that my father would not question me. I arrived in her neighborhood at 6:30 a.m. However, I recall waiting in a neighboring park until approximately 9:30 a.m. before heading to her home.

Mai lived with her father. Her mother died while she was young, and she had no siblings. It was just the two of them, and when I unintentionally caught a glimpse of him, I saw that he was a violent drinker and heavily in debt. Mai seemed to be the one paying off. I assumed she was sleeping with older men to be able to do that.

Surprisingly, she never asked me for money. Not that I had any. Unlike the other rookies, I received no compensation. I worked, but my father pocketed my whole paycheck and only paid me monthly allowances. Which was hardly anything since I was totally responsible for my own food and fare, as well as placing clothing on my back and anything else I needed, such as food and cigarettes. The average monthly salary for rookies is between 100,000 and 200,000 yen. Nonetheless, he provided me with a 10,000-yen allowance. I never received even 95% of my compensation.

Even so, I had to make that last for at least a month. I was struggling in my own way. Surviving on cup noodles, inexpensive convenience store coffee, and homemade onigiris. So, much though I wanted to assist her, I couldn't, but that didn't mean I couldn't check on her.

After about an hour, I eventually reached the apartment complex where she resided. It wasn't anything amazing, and the structure was rather old and in poor condition. I had never gone inside, so I went on a whim.

I remember standing by a weathered blue door, adorned with various stickers. I hit the intercom, but I didn't say anything, because I didn't want her father to find out I was a boy and get her into trouble. I recall not getting an answer. I stood there for an extended period before tapping the intercom button again. I waited for around 2–3 minutes till I heard rustling from inside the apartment.

The door slowly unlocked, and I stood at the railing with Mai standing in front of me on the little genkan. I wasn't sure whether she was the same girl I'd been with before. Her face was swollen and bruised. Badly. The only person I've seen beat up was my mother, and just gazing at each other felt like I was staring back at my mother. My mother was young when she gave birth to me—more than three years younger than Mai. It was difficult not to compare them. At that moment, I felt angry and disgusted.

She was even skinnier than before. It seemed like I was gazing at a walking skeleton, with bones for legs and sticks for arms; her cheeks were hollow, and I couldn't make out any facial features due to swelling. She just stood there, staring up at me. The same empty, lifeless eyes.

"Hiro? "Why are you here...?" She murmured.

"How did you know I lived in this apartment?"

My eyes blinked as I gazed at her from head to toe. She was wearing an enormous white T-shirt with ancient blood stains that had dried and somewhat faded. Her t-shirt was long enough to cover her upper thighs; she was wearing just underwear underneath and nothing on her feet. Her hair was cut short, approximately neck length, and it was also improperly cut, as if someone ran scissors through her hair without thinking. Her hair appeared frizzy, as if she hadn't washed it in weeks; I could see knots and broken ends sticking out in all directions, and her bangs were overgrown, covering the top portion of her eyes and adhering to her eyelashes.

"You look awful." I uttered.

Why was I there? Was I even concerned about her? I'm still not sure why I went to look for her. I didn't love her, and we were certainly not 'friends'. She smiled slightly. It was brief, but I was able to see inside her mouth. Couple of teeth were gone, exactly like mine, but she had more than two missing—at least six or five. Because two of her front teeth remained unaccounted for, it was clear.

“You cannot be here.”

“You should go back." She instructed me while smiling.

"Do you need me to walk you home?" I questioned.

"I don't mind." I continued to communicate in a code she could comprehend, just in case her father was inside.

She looked up at me, her grin dimming as she said nothing. I looked peeped inside the apartment, but I couldn't find anything that would tell me anything about her condition.

“Let's talk. I want to speak with you, Mai."

"Let me in." I uttered.

She grasped the door handle with her brittle fingers and peered behind her nervously, shaking as if looking for someone, before looking back at me and lowering her gaze to the floor.

"I can't," she muttered.

"We shouldn't speak any more. I want you to forget about me now. I won't be returning to school either.”

I was a little astonished. Nonetheless, I was not angry by her response, and I would have normally followed her request. But I couldn't do it just now. I experienced a strange sensation, yet it was a familiar one. Abandonment by others. Usually, it's for something better. But I wasn't sure what I was being abandoned for, and maybe it wasn't about me at all, but my dumb brain couldn't understand her wanting to leave me for any reason other than the fact that I may have done something to upset her, or she was just disgusted by me. What did I do wrong? I questioned myself, "What happened?" Perhaps I was too much for her? I did not love her. What I felt was not love, but I couldn't bear the thought of Mai also exploiting and abandoning me. I wanted to know why, so I wouldn't have to make up another explanation for why someone left me again. Like always.

I moved closer to her and put my hand on the door, ready to push my way inside. when she jerked and stopped me.

"Okay."

“We can talk. Just let me come out. Give me a moment.”

She shut the door swiftly on me. I stood there gazing at the door when I felt something sink into my gut and my hands tighten. Something bothered me. I had no idea why I was there, and that felt confusing. It felt as if static was playing on loop in my brain, and the door in front of me was spinning into something else that I couldn't understand.

I suddenly heard a huge clatter inside the apartment, followed by screaming and shouting.

"Where the fuck are you going?!"

"To whore around again?" "Is that it?!"

"Get back here, you bitch!" The individual shouted into intervals. It was clearly her father. I couldn't hear what Mai was saying, but I did hear a loud thump, which led me to open the door and invite myself into the apartment. Slamming the door behind me. When I went inside, the sight of the surroundings still terrified me. It was filthy. I was moving so quickly that I neglected to remove my outer footwear and there were beer cans strewn about, making it difficult to get through the trash. I heard screams from the bedroom, and the door was slightly open. I walked cautiously, resting my palm on the door, and the sight made my stomach drop to the floor.

Mai's father was on top of her. His hands curled around her neck, and he forcefully gripped it. She was underneath him, unable to produce anything more than whimpers and screams of failure. Her gaze turned to the door, and she spotted me standing there. Her eyes were bloodshot. It was clear he was killing or attempting to kill her.

I have no recollection of what transpired at that moment; the only thing I can recall is being at the door one instant and then repeatedly striking her father in the face while atop him. Mai was grabbing onto me, begging and shouting at me to stop.

"Stop it!" "You are going to kill him!"

"Hiro! Please! "Please, stop it!" She begged.

I don't remember how I ended up stopping, but it was difficult for me. My mind sounded like an alarm, and the heat from my blood boiled within my body. When I finally stopped striking him, I was collecting my breath and gasping, and my hand was bruised and pouring with blood.

Mai sat beside me, weeping. When I eventually regained consciousness and saw his face, my eyes widened. It was brutalized, but he wasn't dead—just unconscious. My gaze turned to Mai as I huffed and looked at her. I assumed this was it. This was why everyone abandoned me, and now she had a reason to avoid me. She'd understand why everyone else avoided me. But she stopped weeping, looked at me, then at her father, and then back at me. She didn't say anything.

She sniffled as she looked around the room, her neck wounded. I glanced at her, and she lowered her head, murmuring.

"I told you to wait outside..."

"Now, you're hurt because of me."

My eyes widened as I slid away from her father and sat on the floor. My hand leaked blood onto the futon as she gazed at me, her focus moving to my hand as she grabbed for it.

"Is that his blood or your blood?"

I sighed as I said. "He was going to kill you.”

"I had to stop him." I uttered.

She shook her head softly as she glanced at me, informed me, and smiled slightly.

"No. When he does it, he never kills me."

"Just knocks me out for a while. That's all."

My eyes widened, but I kept my thoughts to myself. I didn't know what to say, and I didn't want to ask an obvious question. 

It was evident. We were both screwed.