When I woke up the stars were twinkling. My back was frozen over again because of the cool earth. Bad choices on my part again, but nothing new there either. As I sat up, found blanket draped on top of myself.

"Grandma loved these roses," familiar young cadence spoke. I seemed to have startled Almoner out of some reverie. He smiled but unlike when I did it, it was all grief. He'd need more practise with this. I grabbed around until I found his frozen fingers and gripped them.

My foggy mind grappled for ideas. "Yea? They... did look splendid. Didn't think I'd be seen through the thicket."

Blond head jerked to the side to point at a window. Frankly, I hoped this was one of the abandoned houses. It should have been, technically, as Almoner stayed in church... while I was around anyway. I must have caught him in a bout of melancholy. Might as well, misery did love company.

"Are you okay?" he asked suddenly, after taking firm hold of my hand. "The devil... has found you again."

I chewed on my lip, moved by insistent sincerity in the young voice. This sweet summer child of mine. "I'm sorry for not saying anything before leaving. There... wasn't time." There probably was, but I didn't want to take risks. I was selfish like that.

His other hand flailed to dismiss it, "I understand completely. That's fine. I hoped... you'd get back home to your family safe." I don't think I flinched or showed anything on my face. I had too much practise to be read easily. But his eyes scrutinised my face in the dark anyway and at that moment I felt seen through completely. He said eventually, "You didn't answer."

Ah, evading was the mistake. I could be flippant, but felt like I owed this boy more than that. He did take care of my lame ass that entire week for me to just disappear like smoke. "I... am not okay. Not remotely," I admitted impassively, fearful that the admission alone would break the dam. In the companionable stillness some pressure released and I felt that maybe I could do even a little better. "They are dead," I whispered out the cold hard facts and didn't even break to bits. I thought it would hurt more, but turns out I accepted the reality for what it was days ago. I was as low as I could have gone already.

Almoner exhaled so deep he was about to implode. "Because of... the..." he finally stammered out and I shook head, understanding the glaring concerns.

"I don't even fully understand how he'd ended up where I was. Completely unrelated." Just look at me being cool and nonchalant about massively uncomfortable, life-defining events.

"That's... good?"

I shrugged, having no idea. I didn't appreciate being ripped out of the maw of blissfulness, but good for the kid, I suppose. The idol remains untarnished for little while longer.

"Never mind all that! Say, where do you people keep the fuel? I'm going on another trip," I inquired cheerfully, glossing over all the unpleasantries. I knew where they kept the cars, which littered the abandoned roads by the dozen, but important resources weren't sitting out in the open.

My palm got gripped so tight it was almost painful. "You mustn't do that," youth informed me, his shadowed face was fixed upon mine, although he couldn't have seen much either. Before I could protest and insist, Almoner went on, "They wouldn't want to become reason for it. Don't burden them so."

My mouth opened several times as I imitated a suffocating fish. No, there was nothing I could say. He'd completely seen through me. This darkness worked against me.

"The dead don't care," I shot back with venom. Shook my head, wanting to say he doesn't, wouldn't understand. But there was nothing special about it. Mine was generic old story. We're all just playing same old twisted game where nobody wins.

He was correct, I realised. Ruby would slog me unconscious if he knew I was actively trying to waste all his effort of keeping me alive all those years. Really, the man should have invested it differently. Perhaps if that busybody hadn't began picking stays up starting with me, he wouldn't have gone down that sad route at all. There really was no point of me having been alive at all. I found myself pressing the fingers into the wet eyes as if to gouge them out.

"I'm not dead," Almoner's hands gripped my wrists to pull them away just as I started drawing blood and forced me to look at pale outline of the blond head. Damn kid was surprisingly good at this. Not quite the naïve brat he'd seemed to be in daylight. Village healer for a reason, it would seem.

So I'd kissed him. It was likely an overused routine which he'd relayed to every sad sod around - of which there were many nowadays - but I was cheap anyway. He implied and I needed to forget the things he'd dredged up. It all checked out as a go in my head.

The blonde's tongue was sluggish and timid. He hadn't done this a lot, which I'd found surprising – he wasn't that much younger than me. It was saying more about me than him and I listened to every word. What has all that been for? All those people...

His fingers tentatively brushed my hairless chest and my companion snorted lightly, "What is it you're wearing this time?"

"Don't worry, you're gonna love it," I assured him with a smirk, shrugging out of the coat.

"Was this what they were whispering about?" Almoner chuckled to himself, his palm brushing over the leather straps one by one.

When I moved to get closer, the blonde started to put his arms around me but suddenly pulled away, landing the hands on my shoulders this time.

"What?" I asked sensing irritability returning. He couldn't have been that inexperienced. Or was small town boy remembering he's not into men?

"You know I like you," he begun and looked for words above my head.

"But?" I urged instead of agreeing. This was going somewhere I didn't need right now and I was done with all the suspenseful pauses that suddenly befell my life.

"You seem to belong to the devil," blonde whispered choppily.

"So do you?"

Youth shook his blond mane. "Not like that. He doesn't even talk to anyone besides Priest. And even with him, devil just walks away without a care no matter how badly he's mangled."

"Well, that's because... well, for one Priest is immortal and..." they're connected in some way anyway. There was more I could say on the subject, but didn't feel like going into it right now. The kid was just looking for an excuse anyway. "Why would an alien creature even have such concept? He watched me get railed all night long and didn't care. If you don't want to, just grow up and say so," I said with a knowing smirk and patted Almoner on the cheek. I felt his face contort from frown into a surprise and confusion. Introducing more oddities into already stupefied mind might have been a mistake.

"Those people... are they alive?" kid asked stiffly and I didn't react. It was unrelated bit of murder on my part anyway.

I groaned tiredly and chose to address the other thing instead. Monster carried more authority anyway. Strange he had stuck around, but the armed threat to his little slice of paradise must have been a reason enough. "Monster!" I called out into the dead of night and cringed for it was loud, then repeated, "Ey, monster!"

There was no reply. I had no doubt ancient monster could hear lone bellow in the night. And probably not just that, but the entire half-whispered conversation. Those ears were seriously out of proportion with rest of the body. Almoner gripped me by the straps and shook as I was about to shout more, with his horrified eyes obvious even in the dark. I chuckled. As fun as the spectacle could have been, I didn't really want everyone up in my business either.

"Fine, I'll go ask like a cultured person," I sighed for show and stood. "Where's he at?"

"By the church," shaky healer replied, his hands not relaxing nor releasing the straps. Not until I kissed him again. Then I'd left him standing in the shadow, stepping onto the path outlined by solar powered torches here and there. It was meagre but they did the job. If the village people needed actual light they'd set fire to blackened intestines of some monsters. They burned well and brightly. Seeing as all the ritzy doohikeys took a turn towards decline, the alternative advancements would probably end up taking over in the long term.

And I even knew where they kept that barrel. File the idea for later.