[Thor
Does anyone know what the hell she's saying?

Amira
Yes.

Thor
Can you explain it to me?

Amira
No.]

The milk diarrhea was nothing but a symptom of a larger disease... Krainer couldn't stop NECRO Gas from manipulating her father, but she could try to stop him from eating dairy, at least at home.
Before dinner, Krainer decided to take all of the dairy food to her own fridge, in the garage. It was where Polina let her keep baby food and formula, but she had to share it whenever Perry decided to buy too much food, most of which would end up going bad and getting thrown out, unless it was meaty or cheesy. On this day, the fridge was unfortunately packed that very way. Full of doomed vegetables and spare bottles of condiments. Krainer went with her next idea... to feed the dairy to someone else. So she went to the backyard, where her little brother Kroeger was playing with the dog, Bark.

[Lanzo
Did you really need to bark just now?]

Actually, that's the dog's name. Polina had found the dog wandering on the road, abandoned with no collar, tags, or microchip. He's big, fluffy, yellow on top, with a very cute white belly.

[Lanzo
Now I'M gonna be sick.

Thor
You don't like dogs?

Lanzo
I don't like mushy feelings.]

So while Perry was out getting his lunch and the evening's dinner, Krainer cooked and heated up some cheesy food just for Kroeger. And she poured a big bowl of milk for the dog, at the same time as she'd normally warm formula for Bratwurst. The boy and the dog gobbled up the food, and she did that every day, until all of it was gone. It turned out they were all lactose intolerant, but it was worth it to stop their father. At least spread out, the damage could be mitigated.

A few days passed, and Krainer, Kroeger, and Bark were a heck of a team. They'd cleaned out the fridge, and Krainer even had room to store some pre-made formula for once. That evening at dinner, they all made sure to have second dessert. But that was the day it all fell apart, when Perry tried to do the same.

Perry
Hey, the cake and ice cream's gone!

Kroeger
That sucks. I only had three pieces.

Polina
I haven't had any.

Perry
I only had two!

Krainer
I had one...

Perry
Kroeger, you're GROUNDED. No more cake for you, you greedy fat lard.

Now, Perry was no stranger to fat himself. But to say that to his eleven-year-old son? Not cool. Polina, of course, said nothing. As long as he brought home that factory paycheck, she didn't care what he said to her kids, as long as he didn't hurt them. He'd broken that rule before, and paid the price.

[Amira
Ravi, most of this story is just your aunt and uncle being terrible.]

Yeah, I know. I'm almost done, don't worry. So Krainer stood up, and confessed.

Krainer
I'm the one who's been making them eat all the lasagna, and pizza, and ice cream, and cake, and cheese sticks, and pudding, and everything else you know you can't eat! You keep shitting yourself awake every night, and waking up my baby!

Just then, Bark, who'd been sitting in the other room on the rug, let out a big, wet dog fart.

[Thor
Wait wait wait... I can do this part. I've been holding it in since you started talking.

Thor lets out a soft, airy fart.

Thor
Damn, I thought it'd be-

PHBBBTTT, squeak! Amira finishes blowing wet breath into her palms, and starts laughing. Yuna does one, too. SQRRT! They laugh even harder.

Garland
ALRIGHT, SHUT UP! It's a fart, get over it.

Everyone laughs a little, but calms down to a giggle.]

Like I was saying... Bark started farting, a lot. It crept into the kitchen, and smelled so bad, it made Perry drop the food out of his mouth.

Perry
Bad dog! Bad dog, Bark!

Well, Bark got his name for a reason. Every time he was called, his response was the same. But this time, something was different: Bark had an upset stomach.

Perry
Bark!

Bark
Woof!

Bark farted. PHBBT!

Perry
Stop that, Bark!

Bark
Ruff!

FRRRRP!

Perry
Bark, NO!

Bark
BARK!

SQUEAK! Everyone was laughing so hard, but Perry was only getting embarrassed, and angry. He just exploded.

Perry
THAT'S IT! YOU STEAL FOOD, YOU MAKE THE DOG SICK, YOU MAKE YOUR SISTER AN ACCOMPLICE? I DON'T CARE IF YOU HAVE ONE BABY OR SIX! PACK YOUR SHIT AND GEEEET OOOUUTTA HEEEERE!!

Krainer
But-

Perry
NO EXCUSES! GET PACKING!

Perry crossed his arms, and sat down. He'd had the final word, or so he thought. Krainer turned to Polina, waiting for her to stop him. Instead, Polina sighed. She'd been so run-down from work, that instead of rising to the crisis, she practically crumpled, like an imploding tin can. She drew her arms and legs inward, and leaned over the table for support.

Polina
(Quietly, rubbing her temples.) He's right. It's time you got your own place.

Perry
I'm sick of that baby crying, too! Every night, WAH WAH WAH! She thinks SHE has problems?! I'VE GOT PROBLEMS!!

Polina
Perry-

Perry
(Arms crossed, indignant.) Maybe a month in the cold streets will teach you two how the REAL WORLD works.

Polina
(Sigh.)

Krainer
(Freaking out.) You can't send me and my infant daughter out on the STREETS!

Perry
I don't have to do anything you say. I  have lawyers now.

[Garland
This is starting to sound like a bad reality show. Is this really necessary to the story?]

Yes! We're ALMOST at the end.

Krainer
You only need those lawyers because you stabbed a guy at a bar! And before that, you crashed your car into the garage door! And before that, you got into a street fight with a guy in a duck suit-

Perry
(Snapping at her.) Hey – we don't talk about that one.

Krainer
You're OUT OF CONTROL and you're TEARING THIS FAMILY APART!

Perry
I'm not guilty of anything. My lawyers have advised me that what I did was an accident. Anyway, it was just a prank! I was drunk.

Krainer
It's never an "accident" with you! You just do whatever you feel like, and never stop yourself! It's all because you're such a big, STUPID MANCHILD!!

Perry
(Enraged.) You little BITCH!!

After all the yelling, Perry decided to end it. At first he picked up a steak-knife by the blade, and glared at her as he threatened to throw it. But then, he thought better of it... and threw a fork at her instead! But he missed, and the person he hit... WAS THE BABY.

[Yuna
(Shocked.) That MONSTER!!

Amira
(Glaring into the campfire.) I'm gonna kill him.]

Well, that was the end of that 'conversation'. Once Bratwurst started crying, she started wailing. She had four little dots on her forehead, red as blood. Perry looked at Polina, and she refused to look back at him. He knew that he was done for. Krainer had to bring her baby to a doctor, and they had to put a bandage on her head. But otherwise, she was okay. She no longer trusted Perry to be responsible for his actions. How much of what he did was chemicals, and how much was just Perry? Was there a difference anymore?

In the end, Polina made Perry go live with his parents. She'd left an abusive man before, and she wasn't afraid to do it again. Perry found himself a small apartment in Venton, and he hasn't been allowed to return since. The best part was, they could sleep the whole night, and nobody was puking, or shitting, or groaning. Except sometimes the baby, of course.