Jenna got ready for bed with her door bolted. She changed into a nightgown, braided her hair, sucked out her mouth instead of brushing her teeth, and then right before she got into her twin-sized bed, she opened the door. Ever since that terrible night, she couldn’t sleep in her bedroom, and she had even lost her nerve for sleeping in a room with the door closed. She felt much safer if she could hear what was happening outside her bedroom more clearly. She got into bed, curled up into the little shrimp position she slept in, and closed her eyes.
She wasn’t expecting it when Ryatt entered the room. “So this is the way her excellency sleeps? Alone in a twin bed in a sad little room in the servants’ quarters.”
“What were you imagining?” she said in a hostile tone.
“Honestly?” he said lightly. “I was expecting a grand room with a big bed where you were worshiped into ecstasy by more than one lover until sunup.”
Jenna rolled onto her back and moaned. “No, you weren’t! Besides, I wouldn’t have even the slightest interest in that level of depravity. If there’s one thing in this world a person deserves, it’s for the person they’re having sex with to be paying attention to only them. Anything less is sexual abuse.”
“But that’s what you diplomats are famous for with your authorization to have so many spouses,” he reminded her with a peaked eyebrow.
“I have no husbands and zero lovers.” Jenna’s head clunked against her headboard as she reared her head in disgust. “Do you need something?” she asked as she rubbed the sore spot on her head.
“Yeah,” Ryatt said, coming in and pulling at something under her mattress.
Jenna felt the whole mattress lift up and then drop a few inches. In a second, he had converted her twin bed into a double.
“I’m going to sleep here.” He put a pillow down next to hers and covered himself with a separate blanket.
“I don’t want you to sleep here,” she said stiffly. “I gave you a room. It’s nearby if anything happens in the night.”
He stretched out next to her and ignored what she said completely. “I can’t stop thinking about what you told me this afternoon. You heard the prison riot?”
“Yeah,” she whispered back.
“I was there, you know. It was not like the boxing match the other night. That was a kill-or-be-killed night. It wasn’t even like a battle. It was very vicious… traumatizing. I don’t think I’ve been the same person since then. Guards were killing prisoners. Prisoners were killing guards. Prisoners were killing each other. Whenever I think back, there is only what happened before that night and what happened after. I know it’s like that every day, but it’s almost like I remember everything in color until that night and now I remember everything in black and white… even meeting you. I get how you feel having heard it better than I can explain.”
Jenna turned over to face him, quite a lot of her annoyance had been drained from her. “That’s nice of you to say, but I won’t be able to sleep with you here no matter how understanding you are. We’re not close enough for me to feel comfortable sleeping next to you.”
“I have an idea. Let’s not sleep. Let’s just talk, talk straight through the night,” he suggested playfully.
“Will you tell me about Sardius?” she asked cautiously.
He chuckled. “I suppose I will. Though I don’t know what you want to know.”
Jenna didn’t hesitate as she rushed her words. “I want to know what he is like in person. I never got to meet him in person.”
Something in Jenna’s conversation caught in Ryatt’s head. His eyes went glassy. “You and Sardius were in love?”
“What?” she blurted, almost sounding outraged.
“Or more correctly, you were in love with him?” Ryatt proceeded. “He wanted me to deliver the earpiece, but… if he had wanted me to keep my hands off you, I’m sure he would have made that clear. He’s not the sort of man to be trifled with. He’s a butcher.”
Jenna was horrified by what Ryatt said about her and what he said about Sardius. She wasn’t sure which thing bothered her more.
“In a good way,” Ryatt amended quickly.
“He’s a butcher in a good way?” Jenna reiterated drolly.
“If he wasn’t,” Ryatt continued, “I wouldn’t have lived through the prison riot, but a man like that… in love? He could never love anyone. A person can only kill so many people before that part of them breaks.”
Jenna shook her head, unable to believe him. “No. He had a sense of humor. Just because he didn’t let you see that side of him, that doesn’t mean he didn’t have a lighter side that he saved just for me. Sardius became my PA because he wanted to protect me. You should have heard the fuss he made when my high heels tore up my ankles or a thousand other ways he guided me gently instead of being rough. He may not have been as crazy about me as I was about him. Maybe his feelings played to a different melody.”
“What sort of melody?”
Jenna didn’t like what she was about to say, but she said it anyway. “You know, maybe he wasn’t in love with me the way I was in love with him, but he had to have felt something.”
“Then why didn’t he come?” Ryatt asked softly.
“Could he have come?” Jenna snapped back.
Ryatt floundered. “I have no idea. Terrorists don’t generally tell their grunts all the details of their lives. I got off easy. I was given one job. Give you that earpiece, play my cards right, and get a job working for you. That was it. I never expect to see him again.”
“Do you know where he was going?” Jenna asked desperately.
“I don’t,” he said firmly. “But I can tell you a theory. Could a man with that much blood on his hands walk in here without causing a big stink? Would the Octavians be comfortable? Would you be comfortable? Back in my system, he was famous for ripping off software, hardware, starships, money, medicine, supplies, and whatever else. His crimes were pardoned because all the infractions committed by revolutionaries were pardoned, but leaving that star system and coming to this one wasn’t going to make him a different person, change his past, or make his enemies cease to exist. Could a man like that leave his past behind, come here, put on a tie, and be… what? What did you want from him?”
“He was going to be my husband,” Jenna admitted wearily.
Ryatt’s eyes bugged out. “I don’t understand. That doesn’t make sense. Marrying the top OAC diplomat off to a terrorist pirate? I don’t believe it. Did you and Sardius make plans together for him to come here to be with you?”
Jenna drooped. “No. I wanted to marry him, but I had no way to pull him from the prison. After we got married, he would still have been there.”
Ryatt snorted a laugh. “What good was that going to do when he was in prison and you were here? How was he going to protect you? Satisfy you? Be your husband?”
“I liked the idea of no one being able to hurt him to get to me,” she said quietly, knowing that all her past dreams were gone, like clouds that filled the whole sky, but had all been blown away. “No one would be able to kidnap him or hurt him in order to manipulate me if he was in jail in another dimension. It felt like if I put my highest romantic priority with him, my heart would be safe forever.”
Ryatt frowned. “That sounds lonely, but not stupid. It would be better if you shot for something higher. Try to get together with a man who’s tough enough to manage what you need. One who is present.”
“At the time,” Jenna grumbled, “working with Sardius as my PA felt like the safest thing in the world. It felt like he was all I would ever need. Since he’s been gone, I feel worse than I did when I was shipwrecked.”
“I’ll help you to calm down,” Ryatt offered soothingly.
“Oh yeah? You feel up to thrashing six AAMC majors?” she asked violently.
“Not to be too boastful,” Ryatt began, “but if I wasn’t able to do something that astounding, I never would have made it out of that prison, even with Sardius leading the way.”
“You must fight dirty,” Jenna commented.
“I’d fight like I was Sardius if it was for you,” he said, a grin on his face that made his eyes seem warm.
“Huh?” Jenna said in snotty disbelief. It seemed like he was still trying to borrow Sardius’ credibility with her and that annoyed her. To get back at him she moved the subject along. “Have you heard about me?” Jenna asked with a wicked giggle. “About how I’m the hardest woman in the universe to please with only eleven men in the whole sprawling cosmos who I could love?”
“That algorithm is stupid,” Ryatt dismissed. “It doesn’t include men in prison or men who have different skeletons than you.”
“You mean that even if you and Sardius were not prisoners, neither of you would have been included because you’re Bonemen?”
“Yeah. Your pickiness makes perfect sense to me.” His posture indicated he thought he was the best the universe had to offer.
Jenna closed her mouth at how sensible she found him. She couldn't help agreeing.
Ryatt hovered over her. “I want to ask you something.”
“What?”
“Do I look like I know how to do my job?”
Jenna clenched her jaw as she thought over Ryatt’s question. Because she found him mouthwateringly attractive in one moment, it was hard to focus on how he did the maintenance work on her escape pod… or anything else he did.
“Yeah. I think you’ll do fine,” she hedged with an eye-roll as she twisted a lock of her hair between her fingers.
“You’ve calmed down,” he observed before falling on his back.
Jenna’s breath caught. He was right. She was calm.
He snapped his fingers and the little light that was in the room went out.
“What are you doing?” she breathed.
“Shut up and go to sleep.” He lay next to her, though he did not touch her.
She closed her eyes, understanding that he only wanted her to feel safe. Somehow, that was enough for her.
In the morning, Jenna felt like she had slept for years. Had she really been able to sleep next to Ryatt? It wasn’t even so much that she’d slept. It was that she’d slept well. How much sleep had she caught up on? She sat up, scooched to the end of the bed, so she didn’t disturb Ryatt, and went into the bathroom. In the mirror, she looked ten years younger.
“Ixy? Did Ryatt try anything after I fell asleep?” she mumbled into her earpiece.
“It’s Conrad,” the male voice on the other end said.
“How long have you been there?”
“Since eleven last night.”
“Did he do anything to me after I fell asleep?”
“No, he didn’t do anything. You, however, did something.”
Jenna stuck out her tongue. “Tell me now. What embarrassing thing did I do?”
“Nothing. Normally when you sleep, you sleep rolled in this little ball with your knees almost touching your forehead. Last night, you uncoiled,” Conrad informed her.
“Did I?” Jenna asked in astonishment.
“I don’t think it meant anything specific, in case you’re thinking of getting all emotional,” he said in a deadpan PA voice. “Just that with Ryatt next to you, he was stretched out on his back and you did the same thing, like you were following his lead. I’d say it was an improvement.”
“Tell me, Conrad. Do you recognize him? Is he a Boneman you recognize?”
“I’m not sure. However, I need to tell you that I got notice last night that the prison has got their act together enough to send you Sardius’ half of your wedding contract.”
“Is his half complete? Do I just need to sign it to be married to him?”
“Ha! No,” Conrad said over the earpiece. “It means that a sample of Sardius’ DNA is being sent to you as part of the marriage certificate you had the prison make. It’s not a piece of paper. It’s a device that holds his DNA. In order to enact the wedding, you have to provide a piece of your DNA (a hair). Once that’s in place, the bride and groom prick their fingers with the needles provided. His blood hasn’t been provided. They didn’t get that far in the process. In order to make it legal, you would need him to provide his blood. Since we have no idea where Sardius is, the marriage certificate is just a memento at this point. Anyway, the package has just crossed into your system. If it gets picked up by a decent courier service, it’ll be in your hands in a few weeks.”
“Thanks, Conrad.”
Jenna cut her connection with him, retrieved the earpiece that Sardius had sent her, and put it in her ear. Power went on and she felt it connect. “Sardius?” she whispered. She had to talk to him about what she’d just learned.
“Hi,” his beautiful voice drawled. “If I haven’t answered, I’m at the farthest reaches of the universe beating the hell out of something that deserves it. Maybe we can talk some other night.”
Jenna turned off the earpiece. He was serious when he said she had to contact him at night.
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