Toji lay in the grass, staring up at the sky, his mind miles away. He knew he was going to get in trouble for being late, he always did. Most of the time he was able to get out of it by being a smartass, but when it came to more important things, nothing he said mattered. The ceremony today was one of those things. He sighed and held the blue cord above his face with both hands, the sunlight catching the subtle threads of amber and red. It was designed specifically for him with the colors of his fathers’ kingdom…of his kingdom, for all he had done in the last five years.

It wasn’t just a symbol of status or rank, it allowed him more access to the Realms, and a spot in Gods Hall next to Hero and Hawk, something he’d wanted since he was a kid. Now that he had it, he didn’t know if it had been worth it. He may have worked hard, succeeded where others had failed, risen to the occasion and defeated rebel groups and fought in a couple of battles to stem uprisings in several Realms, but it didn’t matter if Dad didn’t care. Pater always had; he praised and cheered Toji and the others on, but Dad…

And you? Would you be proud of me, too? The last thought brought his mind back around to the constant ache in his chest and he took a deep breath to ease what he could.

His arms dropped, one to his forehead, the other across his stomach, still holding the cord. He knew better than to believe his father didn’t care, didn’t love him. Hero was a great father, he just expected more out of Toji because he was the oldest and therefore had more to prove in leadership. He was supposed to be the next King of the Veil after all. Before his fathers became gods, the Veil had no leadership, it was just a neutral territory where souls were grown, deals were brokered, and those from Heaven and Hell could travel back and forth in relative peace. It wasn’t until the truth of Lucifer’s hybrid experiments were discovered that things changed.

Plus, Hawk had created the Veil when he was still the Godstar, the first soul. He had always been meant to rule this place. Lucifer had taken that from him, that and Hero. It took a very long time and a whole lot of painful revelations and memories to come back for them to get here. Toji, Ynda, and Havik had all been created here, becoming the first Children of the Veil to be gods. 

Toji frowned, raising the arm that bore the bracelet his life force came from. 

Toji’s life force; the shifter imp and advisor to Hawk who had served him for centuries as both the Blood King and Hawk Grace Helman. He had been so devoted and loyal, eventually coming to see Hawk and Hero not only as his friends, but as the fathers he had always wanted. It wasn’t until the final weeks of his life that he came to understand that Hawk had felt the same way, even if Toji had been a little shit.

The light bounced off the small light green triangular stone, glinting as he turned his wrist. Hero had given it to him when he was little, telling him it was very special and that Toji was always meant to have it. Toji never took it off. It went from being a necklace to a bracelet when he turned thirteen. Lukas had helped him wrap it around, securing it tightly and burning the edges so it couldn’t come undone. What his parents never knew, what Toji was sure his dad would never believe, was that it wasn’t just his life force and energy that the previous Toji had put into the stone, but his memories and emotions as well. Everything that had been him, he had made sure Hawk and Hero received.

That force, those memories, were now God Prince Toji Grace Helman’s, and they had been plaguing him for years. He hadn’t known what they were, chopping them up to dreams or deja vu. It wasn’t until the one he had a month ago, when Hawk had found him frozen at the top of the stairs at home, that he understood exactly what they were.

He wondered now how the first Toji would feel knowing what a great disappointment he had become to Hero. He was supposed to be something great, something special to his dads; it was why Toji had spent so much time sending the energy into the stone in the first place. He hated that he couldn’t please Hero, no matter how hard he tried. To be fair, he wasn’t exactly making it easy. He was a teenager, nineteen and full of youthful energy. He didn’t want to be responsible yet, he just wanted to have fun with his friends and siblings. The siblings he had asked for and loved with all his heart. Even Havik, who could be a real buzzkill at times.

And then of course, there was this past year to be considered…

Today, he really hadn’t meant to be late. It was a series of unfortunate events that led to both he and Ynda getting in trouble. First, spending more time training with Finn than they should have, second, having to go all the way back to the house to change, and finally, the stupid memory that had him rooted on the cliffside, unable to move no matter how many times Yin called out to him. He couldn’t explain it all to his sister afterward, only saying it was a good one. They had taken off in a hurry after that, racing to Gods Hall like blazing stars…

And they had still been late.

And he was still in trouble.

And Hero was still disappointed in him.

A shadow fell over him, breaking Toji free from his thoughts. His eyes focused on the figure above him and he grinned. 

“What took you so long?”

“I’m not a god like you,” Lukas said, flicking him on the forehead before taking a seat beside him, his uniform jacket opened and hanging on him in the most undignified way. “It takes me a bit more time to get anywhere.”

Toji rubbed the spot where he had been flicked and sat up. Why does everyone have such an obsession with my damn forehead? 

“You’re still an Immortal, my dude,” Toji said. “You’re stupid fast and insanely strong. You might not be able to fly, but you can still keep up if you tried.”

Lukas laughed. “Yeah, right. I’m Yuji to your Gojo, remember?”

“Facts,” Toji grinned, wrapping his arms around his knees, his ankles crossed. Lukas glanced over him, his dark green eyes dancing over his cousin’s tall, sturdy frame, his features strong and defined. Toji was a Helman, even if he hadn’t been born. He had the best features of both his fathers and everyone could see it. The Helman children were considered to be beautiful, Ynda being almost ethereal in her features. Toji was gorgeous, almost exotic in his features, his red hair short and unmanageable, his blue and red eyes bright in his smooth face, his pointed nose small and distinguished. His lips were shaped like Hero’s, the bottom slightly fuller than the top, his grin cocky and self-assured like Hawk’s.  

Lukas thought he was the most beautiful man he had ever seen. Of course it only made sense; Toji was a god.

“You’re eye-fucking me again,” Toji said, not looking his way.

Lukas wrinkled his nose and grinned. “You like it.”

Toji’s eyes slid over to him, his perfectly shaped brow ticking up. “I admit nothing.”

Lukas chuckled and turned his gaze out over the grassy hills around them. They were silent for a few moments before Lukas asked, “So, what did your dad say?”

Toji’s expression became stony and hard to read. “Same old shit,” he said, his deep voice coated with resentment. “I need to be more responsible, he’s tired of trying to cover for me, I’m a disappointment and he’d like to see me turned to stardust.”

“That last part is a lie.”

“It’s how he makes me feel,” Toji muttered, his eyes going to the ground. “No matter what I do, it’s not good enough.”

“You were late to the most important ceremony held by the Divine,” Lukas said. “Being late to school is one thing, Neko, but this is something else.”

“Thanks for having my back, asshole,” Toji glared over at him.

Lukas shrugged. “I swore to you never to sugarcoat the facts, and as a man of honor, I must stand by that oath.”

“Still, fuck you.”

Lukas stuck his tongue out and they both grinned, Toji allowing for a soft chuckle. Lukas’ expression softened. “So what’s the punishment this time? Is he making you stay like he said?”

Toji shook his head. “I don’t know,” he admitted. “Outside of your dad’s extra sets I have coming to me, I’m not sure.”

“What about Ynda?”

“She has two more lessons with Gabriel.”

Lukas gave a pained expression. “Oo, ouch.”

“Tell me about it. I’m sure she’s going to take it out on me, which is fair, I suppose.”

Lukas’ shoulders drooped. “Dude, seriously what happened this time? And don’t tell me it was because you were caught up in another game with Finn.”

Toji fidgeted, letting his knees fall to the side as he started absently picking at the grass. “It wasn’t exactly a game,” he admitted. “He was working with me and Yin on that combo move we’ve been wanting to try.”

Lukas threw his hands in the air and let out an exasperated sigh. “Dude! On today of all days, are you serious?”

“I almost had it, too!”

“I’m sure you did.”

Toji was silent, his fingers moving in and out of the bright green blades before finding a red flower. He picked it, letting a little bit of his core energy surround it, engulfing it in a brilliant purple and black flame that, instead of burning it away, made it grow until it was as large as a rose picked at its peak, the petals glistening and soft. He released the energy and twirled the flower in his long fingers.

“It wasn’t just the training,” he said. “At the house, I had another one of Toji’s memories.” Lukas was the only one who knew everything about what Toji had been experiencing. Not even Ynda knew the full extent of them and the two were just as close.

You know it all, too…I have to remember to tell you about this one as soon as possible…

Lukas stared at him, saying nothing. Toji lay back on the ground, the flower resting on his stomach, the other hand under his head, his eyes piercing the sky above. Lukas watched him, waiting.

After what seemed like several minutes, but was probably only a few moments, Toji said, “It was on the cliffside. Toji was in the kitchen in his cat form. Dad and Pater were outside talking. It was the first night they ever hung out and they were starting to get to know each other. They were sitting too close and their energies mixed. They didn’t know it at the time, all they knew was that they were drawn together and that their souls were connected. Pater was about to kiss Dad for the first time and Toji ran out, stopping him before he could. He could feel them start to get pulled into the Veil, for the first soul connection to happen. Since they had no clue about how the Veil’s power actually worked back then, they would have gotten seriously hurt and Toji had to prevent that.”

He held the flower up over his face. “Pater knew Toji was always watching him, but he didn’t really know to what extent, not then anyway. Toji had eyes on him on Earth and in the Veil. He seemed to always know, even though his memories had been messed with, too, that Dad and Pater would find each other again and he had to be ready for it. That day, not only did my dads almost essentially fuck in front of him,” he shuddered, “but all of his memories of the Veil started to come back to him. It scared him and he wanted it to stop, so he jumped on Pater.”

“So he was saving both them and himself?”

“Sort of, yeah.”

Lukas stared off into the distance, taking in all he had heard. “And that’s why you were late?”

“That’s why we were late.”

A pause. “No secret rendezvous with some girl?”

“Girls are gross, ew, no.” He sat up and pinched Lukas’ neck. Lukas brushed him off and Toji laughed. Lukas grinned.

“Did you tell your dads about it?”

Toji shook his head. “We may have a link, but I keep a lot of things to myself that they don’t know about. Ynda and Havik, too.”

Lukas cocked an eyebrow. “How?”

Toji grinned, snorting softly. “If I tried to explain it, your mind might actually blow up.”

Lukas narrowed his eyes. “Try me.”