Rory

Whenever I came down from anything other than weed, I was always caught between ‘I’m so nauseous I’m never doing that again’ and ‘fuck me, I need to rearrange my life so I can block out a time to do that daily’. It was never anything else, just right in between there.

While Francis had his face pressed to my sliding glass window, probably watching another police take down – his favorite viewing activity – I went and grabbed a couple of my highest dosage gummies from my stash, chewing them as I padded naked to my bedroom.

I opened my bedroom door and my cats all started to saunter out, looking blurry eyed and dazed as they licked their lips. I went to where there was a plastic container by my bed with cat treats and tossed out some like I was feeding the fucking birds, going to the sink to stick my face under the facet to drink from it while the cats ate their snacks.

I got into the shower and quickly washed up then, mid lather with my shampoo when Francis waltzed in.

“Dude, finish up and come watch the world end.” He said as he took the toothbrush I had set out for him for when he stayed over, brushing his teeth briefly. “No joke, it’s on fire out there.”

“Like ‘if the Santa Ana’s are blowing we’re all fucking dead if there’s is a spark’ fire or like ‘Lakers had a game and win or lose, it’s going down’ fire?” I said, sticking my head under the water. “Cuz if it’s a legit fire, I got to get my shit together and the cats in their carriers, but if a local sports team had a game then I’ll get my lawn chairs and we’ll set up the viewing spot.”

“No bro, I mean real crazy shit, not typical crazy shit. Doesn’t look like a riot...more like an attack or something.” He rinsed out his mouth before he dropped his toothbrush by mine, grabbing my towel for me and holding it open while I turned off the shower. I walked into the towel, reaching to the sink to get another to wrap around my hair while he wrapped the other one around my waist. I padded along behind him as he led me back into the living room, the two of us going to the sliding glass door.

And yeah, it was like real crazy shit out there.

Like...people jumping on others and biting them shit, and people eating a police horse shit. I didn’t even know we had police horses in Los Angeles. What the fuck. I was watching a guy rip out the throat of another guy and somehow the fact there were fucking horses running around this whole time…

Damn.

I leaned closer to the glass door and looked out to the building across from us, seeing someone standing on the roof. They were missing an arm and looking worse for the wear, tilting as he looked back at me, drool pooling out of their mouth and eyes opened impossibly wide.

Damn.

I didn’t think I could just stand here and feel nothing, but...here I was.

But I guess that was to be expected.

The entire reason I started smoking was because I accidentally found out one day that weed pretty much numbed me emotion wise, and that had been exactly what I had needed when I got passed what I thought was a cigarette.

Now I varied my dosage depending on how numb I wanted to be, but right now, post shrooms, I had taken a higher dosage and felt pretty much…

Nothing of consequence.

So I guess that was good.

I leaned back. “It’s the fucking zombie apocalypses.” I said in awe, squinting as a truck ran over a couple people as it peeled out of a parking garage.

Francis nodded. “Yup. I mean, obviously.”

I nodded a little. “So...I guess that’s it? End of world?”

“Yup.”

I nodded again, scratching my stomach. “You never talk about your family, Francis.” I looked to him. “You got family out there?”

“Nope.” He said without missing a beat, staring at the apartments across the street.

I reached up and held onto his shoulder. “Neither do I…”

“Bet your glad I’ve been cock blocking you now, huh?” My lips thinned and I looked to his sly smile. “Now you don’t have anyone out there that you have to worry about.”

I shook my head a little. “I’m still pissed about those - however!” I pointed to him as he crossed his hands over his chest, tilted his head, and gave me a curious look, “I can see why I’ve benefited from that now.” I said with a smile as rapid gun fire ripped through the streets and the screaming. We shook hands before we both looked out the window at the terrible sights on the streets.

Blood everywhere.

People screaming, being attacked, attacking.

Just awful.

We both reached for the handle of the sliding glass door at the same time, the two of us chuckling at each other as a police helicopter flew real close to our building. I reached up and took off the towel on my hair while he went and thumbed the lock on my sliding glass door, Francis opening it so we could heard all the screaming and gunshots and noises.

I followed him out onto the deck, wrapping my head towel around his waist so he wasn’t completely naked – in case someone took a picture of the carnage, cuz that’s what people did you know - the two of us leaning over the railing to look down at what could only be described as a very obvious zombie apocalypse.

I mean, you had to be pretty stupid to deny it at this point.

Like...zombies were zombies. There really wasn’t any gray area there where it was this in your face with the reanimation of people with catastrophic injuries.

I sighed. “We should do something?” I asked, frowning deeply as I gestured to the chaos unfolding. “Like, we should really do something, right?”

He shook his head and turned to me, grabbing my forearms with a concerned look. “Bro, you can’t go out there, they smell blood and you’re wounded.”

I sucked in a breath, “I was talking about calling my dealer to make sure he had extra stash for emergencies, but – you know, helping others is important too, I guess-” I frowned before I held up my hand to look at where Francis had stabbed me a couple nights ago, the two stitches looking like they were already dissolving. It kinda cramped when I make a fist, so clearly I was still injured. I nodded a little. “Shit, your right, I’m still wounded pretty bad. What do we do?”

He sighed hard and bobbed his head, licking his lips. “Step one – secure the floor. It’s just us up here, so we’ll just block off the access to the stairs and we’ll be okay.”

“Smart.” I said, pointing to him. “How do we do that?”

He shrugged, “Let’s go investigate.”

I nodded and we turned – I pointed to the kitchen. “We should carry weapons with us from now on.”

“Valid – I got something in my apartment, so I’ll get that. You secure the cats so we don’t have to worry about them.” He said, running off to the door. I pulled close the sliding glass door, locking it. When I turned around, I saw my cats all wandering around and, looking content but curious as to what I was doing outside. “Vacuum, vacuum, vacuum!” I shouted loudly, the cats freaking out and running quickly to the bedroom. I ran over and closed the bedroom door.

There.

The cats were secured.

I went and got a knife from the kitchen, holding it up and giving it a wave, stabbing at the cutting board on the counter to test it out. Yup. Capable. When I felt a shiver of something akin to anxiety (because, hello, zombie apocalypse), I popped another gummy before I went to the apartment door to open it.

Francis came out of his apartment with what I could only figure was a legitimate fireman’s ax and I burst out into laughter, “Dude! Why do you fucking HAVE that?! We live in the fucking city, not the woods!”

He grinned and laughed, shrugging. “I found it one day and thought it was cool.”

“So you fucking brought it home!?” I cackled, laughing harder as waved it around. “BRO!” I laughed as we went to the stairwell, eyeing it. We went over to it and eyed the door before Francis held up a finger, slowly lowering it to engage the lock on the handle with a click. I reached down and grabbed it, jerking it before I looked to him and we nodded. “Okay, secured!” I placed a hand on the door, “Do you think we need more?”

“Probably, yeah.” Francis frowned. “Let me see what I have in my place – you go ahead and give your dealer a call, see if he knows what’s up.”

“Smart – if he doesn’t, I’ll have him drive out here and hand over the goods before he drives up the price. He’s the type to do that shit if I pay him well enough.”

“Exactly.” Francis said with a nod.

I hurried back to my apartment while Francis went to his own, and once I was inside, I went into my bedroom to grab my cellphone and call up Miguel, my long term dealer and former high school classmate/sorta-friend, when he wasn’t trying to fuck my girlfriend.

Miguel’s message machine said he had left town to ‘think over some stuff’, which meant the cops were on him for selling illegally, so that meant he closed up shop and went north, the bastard. I had talked to him a week ago and he was acting all twitchy, which was so embarrassing because I literally just introduced him to Francis two weeks ago.

He better not have embarrassed me in front of my cool neighbor friend or I was...going have some real choice words with Miguel.

I hoped he was okay.

Miguel and I had a kind of tense relationship from time to time, but he was still, you know, the most consistent figure in my life now.

I nervously popped another gummy as I went back to the sliding glass door and looked out. A thought occurred to me and I turned my face a little, “HEY FRANCIS!?” I screamed, Francis shouting back a ‘WHAT’ from the hallway. “WHAT IF THIS IS JUST SOME BAD DRUGS OR SOMETHING,” I sucked in a breath, screaming at the top of my lungs “DO YOU REMEMBER BATH SALTSSS AND THAT CRAZY FACE EATING SHIT?!”

Francis came over then, standing next to me as he looked down to the streets. “I mean, that’s a lot of people.” He said with a gesture to where a group of people were climbing into the first story window of a building. “Like...this looks like classic zombie shit.”

“But like...what if?” I asked, Francis scratching his cheek with the blade of his ax, frowning.

“What if it’s like that zombie movie we watched…” Francis mumbled. “The Girl With All the Gifts?”

“The Christmas porno? That didn’t have zombies in it.” I frowned, trying to think over what was on it. “Did...it?”

Francis laughed, “No, bro- one with the plant zombies, and the stupid ending-”

“Oh yeah, yeah, where we were like ‘let’s just pretend the guy survived in there with her so she can get laid’ cuz the-”

“That’s the one – remember it was like...fungus or something?”

“Oh yeah, yeah.”

“Okay, what if...it was like a bad batch of weed, and like...everyone that just bought new shit today are like-”

“Brroooooooooo that is literally my nightmare!” I cried, clutching my hand to my chest, a vague sense of anxiety bubbling up, numbed around the edges. “This is why I never buy fresh!”

“Bro, right?!” Francis said, “Like, thank God!”

“Bro!” I sucked in a breath, looking out at the chaos. “I’m getting kinda nervous, man.”

“We should get high. That helps with your anxiety.”

“Agreed.” I jolted at what sounded like an explosion, “Gosh, I hope our apartment doesn’t catch fire.”

“Same, bro, I really like it here.” He followed me as I went into the kitchen, getting down the same container of gummies I had taken a few out of a little earlier and been snacking on. “Like where would you want to go if we couldn’t be here?”

“If everyone else is a zombie?” I asked as I unscrewed the lid, taking out three and putting them on the counter before I took out six, handing them to Francis so he would have the same amount as I had taken over the past hour. “I don’t know – somewhere with a fence, I guess.”

“True.” He popped the six into his mouth while I put the lid back on the container, replacing it in the cabinet before I threw the three gummies into my mouth. “Anyway, let’s just get in bed, relax, and see if this doesn’t blow over.”

I nodded. “Good idea. Take a nap and then tackle this with a clear head. Real smart.” I started toward the bedroom, paused at the sound of spitting, then water being turned on, but shrugged and went into my bedroom to get under the covers where my cats were all hiding, waiting out the vacuum like I planned on waiting out the unfolding zombie apocalypse.

Francis joined me a minute later, his ax on the bed above the covers.

We listened in silence to the muted noises before we cuddled closer and went to sleep.

I woke up from all the noise outside feeling suddenly very nervous, but Francis was already awake in bed next to me and handed me a handful of gummies. I chewed them in silence, laying there against Francis and all my cats while I thought about what I always did during the brief periods of when I wasn’t numbed from drugs.

My mom.

Cold.

Unmoving.

Dead after getting drunk and drowning in the tub.

The panic that memory brought faded and I was numb again, drifting off into a deep, dreamless sleep while Francis laid next to me, petting my hair with the hand not holding his ax.