The last thing i remember is being hold by strong arms and the smell of cedar trees, but now, i don't feel comfortable, opening my eyes i realize i'm lying on the couch with a blanket covering half of my body, i have the feeling of missing or longing something but i simply don't know, i'm trying looking for my phone in my pockets, where's my phone? but i find it in front of me on the coffee table with my wallet, it's still clear outside through the curtains, at least it's before noon so i can still work but i don't feel like it, i just wanna go home, make some coffee and forget for today that i nearly got assaulted (...) sitting down and laying my head back i start to remember what happen this morning (...) ahhh that motherfucker i hate him and i hate how he makes me feel, now i have another thing to talk about with my cuckoo-doc, my granny passed away one year and a half ago i had been on therapy since then, it affected me a lot (...) shrinking into the couch and hugging my legs to my chest i start to imagine what would she say in this moment if she was still alive, i miss her with my whole heart but certainly know that she would start screaming in spanglish making a big fuzz about this situation and making me feel better in the process, oh God at least (...)

*toc toc*

who could it be? (...) by the way where's Rique?

''Umm (...) *cough* Hello, I'm Patrick Kendrick i'm here to (...)"

*gasp*

Jesus it's him, ''Umm, please wait a minute'' i pick up the phone and have a look quickly at my reflection if i'm presentable, then, putting the phone again on the table and sitting properly,

''Please, come in'' OMG is that my voice?!, oh come on Joan get a grip (...)

When he open de door he stood in the doorway watching me and (...) sniffing? I'm imagining it? ok, definitely i have to make another appointment with the cuckoo-doc because i'm seeing things now and (...) is that soothing scent of cedar again? the more i smell it the more it seems that i can get addicted to it,

''A penny for your thoughts (...)'' he said shyly and with a curious tone,

''Ahh ahaha it's nothing don't worry, ummm thanks for helping me earlier Patrick, oh please sit down, umm I (...)'' why i'm so nervous? i'm playing with the blanket now? but seeing him right now clearly not with the adrenaline passing through my veins as this morning i can see he's obviously handsome, he's like what? in his late 30's maybe? i don't know but this time i will not fall through appereances even if this temptation is tall, with beautiful gray eyes, a good trimmed beard, salt & pepper hair and very yummy body,

''Thank you, emm ~ Joan right? your partner Enrique told me your name and don't worry about it i was just passing through (...)'' he was staring at me one minute and the other, he looked shy, but a man like him shy? why?

''I bring you some relax tea (...) that's what they said in the tea shop, i think it's chamomile with other herbs i don't fully recognize (...)'' is that a blush? ~ OMG he's so cute

''Thanks, i'm good now and thank God you were there this morning, you saved my life and now you bring me some tea to help me calm down am i still dreaming or is there something i need to know ahah~ahah (...)'' i chuckle nervously

''No, i'm just concerned about you and wanted to know how you were doing, if there was anything i could do to help (...)'' he said as he leans back crossing his arms and making those muscles shows off, oh Patrick you don't need to show off anything just looking at you it's a true eye candy, fuck, why i find myself lusting after a complete stranger it's weird but i can't help it,

*cough* *cough*

i see him again and he made a gesture like sniffing the air, is that normal? i stink? maybe because of the stress i have been this morning but at that extent? cautiously i try to smell my shirt but i failed so i leave it like that, it doesn't matter now, he look at me suspiciously and again that cute blush appears, i like it (...) i like it, really? oh of course i do, but right now and with the morning events i just want to cuddle under my sheets and wait for my next appointment with Dr. Terry,

*sip*

''Again, Thank you Patrick, i know that probably i don't have much to offer but maybe i can repay you saving my life with coupons from the store'' i'm giving him my best smile and trying not to sound weird or 'flirty',

''You don't have to, really, i'm glad you're feeling well, i gotta go now and please rest, your partner asked me to come check on you while he filed the police report so (...)'' he stood up an walk to the door 

''As i said before, please rest and nice to meet you Joan" he said as he gave me a smile and a wink before closing the door

*thump* *thump*

Jesus (...) my heart is racing, i think i'm having a heart attack oh Joan don't be a drama queen, it's just that you found that guy extremely atractive and that's all! If a guy like that talked or just walked up to me, of course I would be nervous right!? oh God please help me, I (...) taking my hands to my head i turn around and saw Rique with an odd expresion,

''Now you talk to yourself ... alone, yep i'm taking you to the clinic, maybe you got your head injured let's go''

''Oh Rique you're exagerating now, it's (...)'' as soon as i saw him i start to cry he try to hold me but the slightest touch i flinch, i don't want to be touched (...) i hated it (...) Rique was trying to comfort me but he didn't know how, not even me; In the midst of my sobs, i heard footsteps and once again, the scent of cedar flooded my lungs, soothing me as if it were caresses trying to comfort me, Patrick came to my mind, when i had a look at the door, there he was with his eyes on me and it makes me happy,

''I'm ok now i think i can (...)  *sob* *snif*''

''Hey buddy, you don't seem ok i wasn't exagerating before, i already make an appointment with Dr. Terry so we can go now, do you need help to get up or (...)?'' Rique is like a mama bear and that's what i love the most about him, he always takes care of everyone thank God he's my best friend,

''No don't need any help thanks, i'm ok i think the tea did it's job and relaxed me enough to get me that emotional, thank you both of you really, and Patrick? you have to tell me what kind of cologne you use, because the scent of cedar is very relaxing is like aromatherapy'' standing up and walking out of my office i manage to see Patrick's expression of atonishment as if I had said something special; When we got to the parking lot my heart start to race as if i had been on a marathon and my lungs and and (...)

*inhale*

*exhale*

*inhale*

*exhale*

''Sweetheart, listen to me you're safe now, we are here for ya, look at me with your beautiful chocolate eyes and breathe with me *inhale* *exhale* *inhale* mmm there you go (...) good boy'' Patrick's soothing and bossy voice makes me feel better little by little,

''Hey! what are YOU doing? he's my friend you just met him and as long i as know he's not your sweetheart, he's nothing to you, so please back off and take your hands off him, i appreciate that you're helping him but (...) oh are you kidding me now Joan??!!!'' Rique sounds exasperated but couldn't help it, i found myself with my arms around Patrick's neck smelling him and that calm me almost immediately, his hands running up & down my back soothing me and right now this was the only thing i needed,

''Patrick, could you take us to the doctor please, i don't understand what is happening but i feel good right here in your arms, so please can you take us?''

''Wherever you want, sweetheart'' he said smiling and of course Rique wasn't happy about it,

''Joan please, you just meet him, are you serious?!''

*sigh*

''I can't take you seriously while you're clinging like a monkey to a complete stranger, look i'm taking ONLY YOU to the doctor not Mr. Stranger here too ok?! (...) look i'll calm down and let you be with your knight in shining armor only when the doctor examines you and says you're fine (...) *sigh* i just want to look out for you and make sure you are okay Jo''

''I know you do (...) i'm sorry but (...) can we go now, please?''

*sigh*

''Ok, let's go''

I don't understand why I can't get away from Patrick's side but it does feel good to be near him, the whole trip to my cuckoo-doc i was seated on his lap and he kept running his hands up and down my back, all the way we were in silence and i really appreciated that, once we got into the parking lot a feeling of dread came over me again but it didn't feel the same this time and i'm relieved, when i got out of the car and getting off Patrick's lap a sense of sadness and abandonment took over but instead of feeling anxious i'm starting to wonder why i feel this kind of attraction towards him, is it normal?

''well guys, thanks for the ride but from here on out I'm on my own''

''Are you sure? i can join you inside and wait if you want me to (...) because i want to (...) you know?'' Rique seems very concerned and sad and (...) is he blushing? (...) awwn i love my bestie, i will always do

''I'd love to''

''It's settled then'' Rique said with a big smile and giving Patrick a 'you're not in our plans' glance

''And what are you going to do, Patrick? join us or leave?'' Rique said in a sassy tone and that seemed to amuse Patrick,

''I'll be on my way, i have a couple of things to do in town so i'll leave you guys, see you then''

Watching him walk away makes me a little sad, but that's okay, he's a complete stranger who helped me and that's it.

''Yeah sure Jo, say it again until you believe it, the way you hung around his neck and the intimate scene in the car touching you makes me think he might stop being a stranger (...) and if you give him a chance?''

''Now you're the one talking nonsense''

''Am I? are you completly sure?''

''No" i stop walking and watching Rique's reaction,

''No what? you're not sure of him stoping being a stranger or you don't want to get involved with him? mm?''

''Look, I'm going to deal with this first ok? I'm going to get out of this mental mess and I'm going to think about it''

''Ahahah what's with that 'Im going to' in loop? you sound now like an English lesson tape?''

''You're making fun of me now but Rique (...), it's weird that i'm this clingy to him and i'm aware of it you know (...), i really can't deny this kind of interest or attraction that i feel towards him and of course i know i meet him this morning and it's too soon (...) but with what happened this morning i need time now (...) to even consider if I want to get to know him better''

''Oh i bet you do my slutty Jo''

''Oh shut up, we'd better go inside, we're late for my appointment''