Orion struggled and struggled before becoming depressed. He no longer struggled with temper tantrums after that. He kept to himself and focused on his schoolwork. It became much easier to regulate his emotions when his emotions were numb for the most part. One bad thing solved another in a way.

To almost anyone else he appeared normal, but he couldn't remember a lot of things. On occasion people would talk to him a little too casually, or act in ways suggesting they were friends. But only parts of Orion were acquainted with them.

At the time Orion chalked it up to having a bad memory for people. So many of his symptoms went unnoticed or swept under the diagnosis he already had.

During the time he was in high school his depression started to lift, and his emotions came back in full force. He found it easier to control himself than it had been for him as a child. Whether it was because his brain developed more or it being a gradual change he didn't know. To him it was almost like a blessing to be able to act a little more normal than he had.

After a time, he started to become aware of the inconsistencies in his behavior. Evidence parts of him didn't quite have the same way of doing things as he did.

Even something simple like his note taking skills varied in a noticeable way. Some days his notes were detailed to the extremes and other days he only wrote down maybe a single word the teacher said. It was vexing to say the least.

Even to other people he just seemed eccentric, moody, or otherwise weird. “Well maybe that's just how I am.” He often thought. It wasn't until one day he sat down to take an exam and found himself home in an instant, had it finally sunk in something was wrong. Something was very wrong.

It was not obvious to him, nor the humans around him…

Even so he still struggled with denial. He’d forget, and he'd forget that he had forgotten it. And when he'd remember, he'd find all manner of excuses to avoid it. “Maybe all shadows are like this.” But he was wrong about that.

The Lucidians found out before he could even tell.

"But I never went through anything that would warrant this sort of response. Sure, it wasn't great, but it wasn't that bad right?" He came up with several theories on what he might've missed, but it only stressed him out more.

They made sure he got proper care but…

There was never one thing, one incident, nor a singular experience that got him to this point. 'Little things add up sometimes.' A phrase he often repeated to himself throughout waves of denial. It didn't matter if it was true or not, it only mattered that he didn't fixate on irrational possibilities or ignore the problem entirely.

The Lucidians also did something else during this time.

Considering how much of a struggle getting to this point was, managing it ended up being easier than he expected. All the training on how to emotionally regulate himself, as well as conflict mediation and various other skills and tools he learned as a kid helped.

He was never going to be normal but…

It made unwinding his inner conflicts a far simpler task than he could ever have imagined. Therapy and some guidance were all he really needed at the time. He may have been fragmented but all of his parts had the same goals and motivations. Which is why it was so hard to notice at first.

A time between healing, parts of him became forgotten again.

How they went about it was slightly different and they all dealt with distress differently, but with such a clear goal they often worked together seamlessly. Often to the extent that it became hard to notice again, but less like denial and more like a cohesive self.

To protect him, or to protect themselves perhaps.

After a few years he became stable again, and consistent. His memory stopped having breaks and things he couldn't remember about people came with more ease to him than previously. He was normal-ish.

He may never know who or what it was that he is missing.

Remission as it was, enough to get along with his life again. Not to say he went without problems, but who didn't struggle every now and again.

What seemed like normal lapses in recovery, had been supplemented by something not so great…