More people applauded when Blue was asked to step on stage for the inauguration of new agents. Blue was made captain and Blue can decide who will be part of his squad. Ryzel decided to leave in the middle of the celebration because he feels suffocated. He needs to take a breather and decided to go to the rooftop.
Tying his hair into a messy bun, he sat on the ledge and popped two buttons off his shirt. He grabbed his pack of cigarettes from his pocket and lit one stick, then took a whiff. Ryzel is not a heavy smoker; he just smokes one when he feels incredibly restless.
Aside from the training, his loss of sleep was caused by his night terrors. Even if squad captains can have the room all to themselves, Trevor had Seven join Ryzel in case of emergencies. No one can predict what Ryzel will do to himself when attacked by his nightmares.
"You don't look like someone who smokes."
Ryzel's finger stopped in the middle of another whiff and turned around to check the newcomer. "Oh. The new squad captain. Having an army general for a father has its perks, hmm?"
Ryzel is aware that Trevor will not appoint someone as a captain if Trevor does not deem that person qualified. This is just Ryzel's way of venting out his stress, and Blue was the poor recipient of it.
Blue's jaw tightened at the unnecessary remark. Blue doesn't understand why he came to the rooftop in the first place. It's just that, when he saw Ryzel leaving, he found himself drawn to the man and before he knew it, he was already on the rooftop.
"My family has nothing to do with my new position," Blue gritted out and threw a hard glare at Ryzel who seemed unfazed.
Ryzel smirked and stood up, then spread his arms to feel the cold, night breeze. Blue's eyes widened and immediately stepped forward. "That's dangerous! Are you trying to kill yourself?" Blue rarely raises his voice, and even in high-stress situations, Blue always keeps his calm, but seeing Ryzel like this, was making Blue's chest pound nervously.
Blue's hands poured cold sweat as he held his breath, his fear-filled eyes fixed on Ryzel's every move. "Get down now, Ryzel!"
Ryzel glanced at Blue with a blank stare. Then, for some reason, he found himself smiling in amusement at Blue's flustered expression. "Why so agitated, Winters? It's not as if you care about me. It's none of your business if I jump off this building."
Blue's frown deepened and took another step forward. "The wind is getting stronger, Ryzel. Get down now." Blue's tone was firmer and more commanding this time.
"Sure..." Ryzel trailed off and even if the rooftop was dimly lit, Ryzel was able to see Blue's relieved expression. Blue is an attractive man, for sure. The man is an eye candy, but Ryzel feels nothing. His heart is hollow and stone-cold to entertain any emotions.
Blue is amusing, but that's it. Ryzel doesn't care what Blue thinks of him, but Blue will be enough to distract Ryzel from his hidden demons. "I'll get down if you agree to be my slave."
With a slacked jaw, Blue stared at Ryzel, dumbfounded. "W-What?" Blue stuttered, appalled at the sudden request.
"Be my sl--" A strong gust of wind caused Ryzel to become unsteady on his feet and he should be scared when he lost his footing, but all Ryzel could feel was relief. Ryzel closed his eyes and a sense of peace filled his heart at the thought of falling to his death.
Not Ryzel's ideal way to die, but it's now or never. Ryzel accepted dangerous missions hoping he would get killed in action, but Ryzel has a competent squad. It's my fault for accepting amazing individuals, Ryzel thought as he felt gravity doing its work.
Ryzel's peace was temporary because he found himself being hurled back by a strong force and with a loud thud, Ryzel was pressed into Blue's hard body, with Blue's loud and fast heartbeat against Ryzel's ear. Ryzel want to sit up but Blue's hold on Ryzel was gripping and tight.
"Winters, let me go--"
"Do that fucking stunt again and God forbids... I will lock you up in a safe room," Blue threatened with ragged breaths and when he glanced at Ryzel, the man was pale and sweating bullets.
"Let me go, fucker." Ryzel's voice was shaky and his lower lip wobbling. His face lost color and his body was tensed.
Only then Blue realized that Ryzel was shaking like a leaf. For a second, Blue forgot that Ryzel hates to be touched so Blue immediately released Ryzel. Ryzel stood up in a haste, his trembling fingers digging into his arms, as he tried to calm his breathing.
Dark memories filled his mind. They were too dark to be vocalized. They were gnawing and seeping into Ryzel's system, slowly creeping and wrapping their invisible vines all over Ryzel's limbs, making him weak and scared shitless.
Ryzel shakily threaded his hair and took a deep breath, and without a second glance, headed back to the elevator. Seven, who was looking for Ryzel, saw Ryzel coming out of the elevator, weak and white as a sheet. Seven knows Ryzel's condition, but not the real story behind it. Seven and Jameson are lucky that Ryzel is comfortable with them.
"Captain!" Seven rushed to Ryzel and grabbed Ryzel who flinched for a second, but when he got a whiff of Seven's familiar scent, Ryzel relaxed and leaned against Seven. Ryzel feels dizzy and he needs his medicine to stop the tremors and to halt the bad memories from slowly flashing.
"Get me back to our room. Quick."
Seven nodded and carried Ryzel on his back in a haste. Blue, who ran four flights of stairs to catch up to Ryzel, saw that Seven was carrying Ryzel. Blue wanted to apologize but what he saw was a slap in the face. "He's fine, and I'm not?"
Blue remembered Ken's words. 'Captain Ryzel is fine with Seven and Jameson since they are harmless.'
Do I pose as a threat to you, Ryzel? Am I dangerous?
Blue gritted his teeth and almost smacked himself for thinking that. Who cares what Ryzel thinks? It's just the first day, and Ryzel is making Blue waver. Blue ran his hands over his face in frustration and sat on the stairs. "This is going to be hard."
For the first time in a long while, Blue Winters is in a state of confusion and dilemma between his mission and trying to regain the peace that Ryzel disturbed.
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