***

“Yeah,” he said, moving his phone from one ear to the other. “I’m running a short survey.”

He always kept the phone numbers the guys he hooked up with gave him. He wasn’t the kind never to kiss the same lips twice or ghost people without a strong reason. Easygoing, fun, a calm port in the storm – he was all that. And until now, a lot of college boys going to Sunny Hill had appreciated him for it. He liked to believe that he was still friends with most of them. Or at least pleasant acquaintances.

“Did you ever think I was a heartbreaker?”

The short hesitation at the other end wasn’t lost on him.

“Well, Jamie, to tell you the truth,” the other began, “during the short time I spent with you, I felt that you were emotionally unavailable. I mean, I loved the sex and the talk, don’t get me wrong, but I knew we wouldn’t move beyond that. And it sort of sucked because I really liked you.”

“You don’t like me anymore, then?” If he remembered correctly, he had hooked up with this guy twice. Or was it three times? If that was the case, it had to be Jamie’s longest relationship to date.

“Are you emotionally available now?” came the direct question.

Jamie had no idea what to say to that. It was too serious a question to downplay it and treat it lightly. At the same time, an honest answer wasn’t in the cards. Because really, he didn’t know what to say.

“I guess you understand what I’m trying to say here,” the guy said. “If it helps, I think you’re awesome. I had the best rebound sex with you.”

“Have you had rebound sex with others?”

A chuckle followed. “I’m not going to answer that. I don’t want you to think I’m a slut.”

“I’d never think that about you.”

“I know. You’re a nice guy, but that’s it. And others in your place would definitely be more arrogant and egotistical compared to you, but it’s not enough for me.”

“You never said anything.” Jamie grunted in frustration as he moved his phone from one ear to the other again.

“It wasn’t worth the trouble. I knew I would get myself into other trouble if I hoped for more. You would have ended up breaking my heart, even if not intentionally.”

Okay, that was bad, Jamie thought as he finished the conversation. It had to be a fluke, and this guy just happened to be a big romantic at heart. Therefore, his strange opinion of Jamie and what their no-strings-attached sex had meant for him.

His contact list was long, and he had time to kill until his shift at the coffee shop started. With a confident smile on his face, he took a look in the mirror. He really was a nice sight shirtless. No wonder his followers were so riveted by his body. He flexed for a moment waiting for the next guy to answer.

***

“It’s not good enough.”

You don’t say. It’s not like you have to come up with new ideas every day.

“And what the fuck is going on with your grades?”

“You know,” he decided to stand up for himself for a change, “it’s not exactly easy juggling everything. Try being in my place for a second.”

An unpleasant grin was the immediate response. “I don’t have to. I was in your place. And I did my job. Every day, and yes, that included grades and all. Do better.”

Do better, he mimicked in his head just for the sake of having a little comeback to the scolding he was getting for no reason at all.

No one had any idea what it felt like to be him. His older brother the least of all people.

TBC