Dear First Love, 

Your friends approached me today. They weren't happy. They beat me up and told me to know my place. I don't need them to tell me that though. I know my place. I was just greedy and selfish then to want more than what I deserve.

I don't understand why you were so upset when you saw me later on. I know I looked horrible and bloody then. Was I so ugly and pathetic that it made you so upset? I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I ruined your mood. I'm sorry that I'm so pathetic.

You asked me who did this. I can't tell you that it was your friends. But I think you already knew. After that, I saw you punch your friends. You fought with them. Was it my fault? If it was, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry that this happened all because of me.

You got hurt when you fought with your friends. You also got in trouble. You were yelling at them for hurting me. As horrible as it felt to see you get hurt, it also felt warm that you defended me. I shouldn't feel this way when you get hurt. But I do. And I'm sorry for that.

When the fight ended, you were injured. You had been punched in the face and had bruises all over. It made my heart feel like bursting. I was worried about you. I'm sorry that I cried in such an ugly way when I helped to treat your wounds. I'm sorry that you had to waste your time comforting me. I'm sorry that I got tears on your uniform when you hugged me.

Sincerely,
H.