Chapter Five – I Want to Know You, Jamie Vayne!

Fiddling with the thick padding wasn’t an easy task, and Jamie had to admit that he was getting more and more frustrated. He had dragged the pink rabbit behind a large tree, although the chances of someone stumbling upon their little fumble in the dark were slim at this hour. Floppy Ears was obeying in a very conspicuous manner, and Jamie had a mind to tell the guy to breathe already because nothing bad was going to come his way.

“All right, I give up,” he said, throwing his hands in the air. “How do you expect me to jerk you off if I have no idea how to get into your horrible costume?”

“It’s not horrible,” the rabbit replied primly. “You just have no taste.”

“Are you for real?” Jamie moaned. “Do you still want that handjob or not?”

“I do.”

“Then help me get your dick out.”

The rabbit began rotating slowly as he tried to reach behind himself.

“What are you doing?” Jamie asked, while observing with increased amusement the way the pink bunny struggled with whatever it was he was struggling with.

“You will have to help me,” the rabbit finally admitted.

“Okay, I’m open to suggestions. How?”

The bunny boy turned his ass to Jamie, wiggling a big ball of fluff that had to be his tail. “There’s a zipper down there,” he said in a low whisper.

“No one else is here. You can talk as loud as you want.”

“I don’t want to risk it,” the second whisper followed.

“Risk what?” Jamie felt his Spidey sense tingling. “Shit, are you guys hunting in packs? Who else is here?”

“No one,” the rabbit hurried to assure him. “It’s just me.”

“I don’t believe you,” Jamie shot back. “Damn, what league of perverts do you belong to? That’s it. I don’t want to have anything to do with you. Take your boyfriend or whoever is watching us and take a hike before I get pissed.”

No wonder Xpress was always talking like there was a bunch of assholes behind those stupid daily gossips. He should have seen it. Suddenly, he didn’t feel like playing anymore.

“Wait, where are you going?” The rabbit rushed behind him on his big feet. They had to make quite the picture. “We’re not done here.”

“Oh, no, Floppy Ears, we’re more than done. Stop following me.”

“There’s no one else here! I can prove it to you!”

“How exactly?” Jamie continued to hurry away, while the bunny hopped behind him. That thing about rabbits being fast didn’t apply to this guy.

“If you promise that you won’t take my head off, I’ll come to your place. Where we can be alone.”

“Aren’t you a presumptuous piece of shit? I doubt your memory is that bad, but you were the one begging for a hand only earlier.”

“I want to know you, Jamie Vayne!” Unlike the whispering from before, these words were shouted loud and clear.

Jamie stopped and turned on his heel to face the weirdo. “Are you a stalker? Just tell me the truth, I won’t get mad.”

“More like a fan,” the bunny admitted and tapped one big foot nervously on the ground. “A guy like me would never have a chance with a guy like you.”

Jamie crossed his arms and shook his head. “You should let me be the judge of that.”

“No. I’m not the type of guy you’d get with by far. You have standards.”

“Oh, stop it already. I can tell you’re trying to butter me up from a mile away. What’s your deal?” Jamie examined the frumpy bunny with keen eyes, even though there wasn’t much to see in the streetlight casting its shadows over them. However, the way those shoulders hunched and the rabbit’s head stayed leaned forward as if he was demurely looking down told Jamie all he needed to know about the playacting.

He was dealing with a liar. There was no doubt about it. This dude was trying to play him, and there could only be one explanation for it. The rabbit had to be Xpress; the gossip rag wanted to fuck with him for reasons unknown and this was his chance to unravel it all.

All he had to do was play the fool and play along as if he hadn’t already guessed the truth.

“No deal.” The bunny waved his hands as if he had already been defeated. “You’re a legend, Jamie Vayne. And it’s only in this costume that I can get close to you.”

“I see. Now, what exactly do you have in mind? Do you have a couch somewhere for me to lie down on, stare at the ceiling with my hands linked over my belly, and tell you my life’s story?”

“I’d prefer your couch.” The rabbit seemed to perk up, most likely under the illusion that his ruse was working.

“Okay. But any deal has two parties. If I’m giving you my life story, you’ll have to give something back.”

“You name it.”

Jamie grinned. His followers had often asked if he planned on doing collabs with other adult-oriented streamers. He had never been interested in doing anything of the kind, but now, he saw an opportunity to inject some new life into his professional career as an entertainer. Also, it was most likely that he’d get more people interested this way.

“So, as long as you keep that bunny head on, can I undress the rest of you?”

“Yeah, yeah,” the bunny agreed.

“And I can do whatever I want to you and with you?”

The rabbit squirmed in his oversized costume. “Sexual?” he asked, his voice dropping low again.

“Yeah, sexual,” Jamie drawled the word. This guy sounded like such a big nerd. He needed an explanation at every turn. Sure, that meant that Jamie had to avoid underestimating him. For all he knew, this frumpy rabbit bit was just an act. It had to be an act.

“Then I agree.”

“You should ask for more details before saying ‘yes’.”

“You’ll do sexual things to me, which is what I want,” the rabbit said hurriedly.

“Okay, so it’s a ‘yes’?”

“A resounding ‘yes’,” the bunny replied with conviction.

“Great. Then in two days, you’ll be live on stream with me.”

“What?!”

Jamie began walking away, his hands in his pockets. “Like the stalker you are, you know where I live. So be there, at eleven PM sharp. I’ll give you half an hour to prepare yourself, but then we’re going live, baby.”

“What about the handjob?” the rabbit yelled after him, as he gave up on following.

“You’ll have to earn it, Floppy Ears,” Jamie shouted back.

He didn’t look back once. He had this one in the bag.

***