Hero didn’t talk to Hawk for three days after that. No matter what Hawk tried, Hero ignored him. Whether it was through the link, through text messages, or by using Jordan or Elaine as a middle man, Hero wouldn’t answer him. Even at work, he would walk right past Hawk without a word, keeping his eyes averted. He didn’t even need to drop the shield for Hawk to know the amount of pain he was in. When he asked Toji what he should do, the shifter was less than helpful.

“Talk to him, stupid.” 

“I’ve tried!” Hawk complained. “He won’t talk to me, he won’t connect with me, he just…hides…”

“Gee, sound familiar?”

“That’s not even remotely the same and you know it.” He folded his arm on the table and buried his head. His chest hurt, his mind was reeling, and he felt like he was completely disconnected from reality. Even searching his core didn’t produce anything. On occasion, he had been able to find an energy trail connected from Hero to his core thanks to the casing he had unwittingly created that first night. 

He groaned, wrapping his arms around his middle, slamming his forehead into the table repeatedly until Toji got fed up and literally threw him outside. 

“You know what the most pathetic thing is about this whole thing, Hawk Helman?” he yelled, spitting the name out like it was rubbing alcohol. “You used to be the most feared being in the entire known universe. You tore your way through countless demons and angels, defeated armies for a Devil King who, let’s be honest here, didn’t fucking deserve it, and nearly killed God. Yet here you are, a sobbing, pathetic wreck of a being who can’t even be honest with the one person in your entire existence who dared to fall in love with you.”
He crouched down next to Hawk, shifting into a cat and scratching his face. Hawk didn’t even flinch. He didn’t even care. Nothing could hurt worse than what Hero was doing to him now. 

“You need to make this right, Your Majesty, or you’re going to be praying for the madness you’ve been so scared of.”

Hawk flinched at the title. “Don’t call me that.”

“Why not, Majesty? It’s only respectful of me to do so, isn’t that right, Your Majesty?”

“I said stop it.”

Toji laughed in his face, his mouth wide, fangs showing. “You used to demand people refer to you as that back in the day, literally ripping people to shreds if they didn’t. Of course, that was only after you accepted that they wouldn’t quit calling you ‘King' in the first place.” 

“That was a long time ago. I’m not that guy anymore.”

“No, you sure as fuck are not.” He shifted back to the dark skinned teenager with amber eyes and red dreads with beads tied into a few, wearing cut-off jeans and an old t-shirt, an armband with three feathers wrapped snugly on his upper arm. He sat cross legged, his cheek resting on one fist. “Now you’re just some sad sap moping around because the man you rejected won’t talk to you.”

“I didn’t reject him.”

“No? Then tell me, what did you do? Stand there like an idiot with your mouth hanging open and nothing to say?”

Hawk said nothing. Just sat up and put his head in his hands. 

“That’s what I thought.” Toji got to his feet and walked around to face his charge, lifting his head up with his bare foot, forcing Hawk to look at him. “Open the fucking box, Majesty, and stop being a fucking pussy about your feelings.”

Hawk glared at him. “I’m not being a pussy about anything.”

“Really?” Toji said, putting his fists on his hips and tilting his head. He put his foot down, standing with both feet apart. “The wall is down but the box is still sealed, right? That’s what you told me.”

Hawk averted his gaze but Toji forced it back. 

“Is it locked?”

“What?”

“The box, is it locked?”

“It’s sealed, it’s the same thing.”

“Is it?”

Hawk swallowed.

“I can cut through a seal with the tip of a pencil if it’s weak enough. A lock takes more work to break. So I ask again, is it locked?”

“No,” Hawk said under his breath.

“Then fucking open it and share how you feel, you stupid, sorry excuse of a King!”

“I’m not a fucking King, stop calling me that!”

“You were! And you deserved to rule Hell, everyone knew that.”

“Fuck Hell! They threw me out! Sent me to this piece of shit rock to rot and forgot about me.”

“And what would you do if they suddenly wanted you back?”

“I’d destroy it! I’d destroy the entirety of the Realm without a second thought. If I can’t have Hero, then why would I want to—” His voice trailed off as the reality of his words struck him to his core. He had so long wanted to find a way back to Hell, to pick up where he left off, to elevate the Devil King he once served. It was one of the many reasons he didn’t form bonds here. What would be the point if he were going back anyway? It was the way back that had eluded him. Everyone kept reminding him time and time again he was the Last Lone Exile, the one who was destined for madness, that he would never again go home.

Now…it didn’t even matter. None of it mattered. He held up his hands before him; hands that had bathed in blood and gore, that had created devastation and chaos. These were the same hands that held the most beautiful creation in all the universe, that tenderly caressed his face, ran down his back, teased his thighs, held his face gently as he kissed him, that held him close so he could hear his heart beating, both here and in the Veil.

These hands Hero chose to hold every chance he got. Would he still want to hold them if he knew what Hawk really was? Would Hero still love him if he knew? 

“You need to reach out to him, Hawk,” Toji said.

Hawk shook his head. “I can't, he's had his shield up for days and he won’t answer my calls.”

“So break it.”

Hawk turned to him, those same amber eyes as his own staring blankly back, as though the answer really was that damn obvious. “And how, pray tell, do you recommend I do that?”

Toji smiled, sharp white teeth glinting in the moonlight. “Your Majesty, I thought you’d never ask.”

-*-

Hawk was distracted all night at work as he tried to chip away at Hero’s shield, seeing how far he could get before Hero noticed. Toji had told him that breaking it outright might have some negative consequences and hurt Hero. Since that was something Hawk wanted to avoid at all costs, Toji recommended knocking away at it a little at a time until it crumbled on its own, or if Hero decided to drop it.

Using an energy tendril from his core, he snaked his way down the Veil tube until he reached Hero’s shield, a large yellow and red one with the symbol of a red tailed hawk on it. The irony was not at all lost on the intruder. 

All night, he worked at it while simultaneously trying to remain focused on his job. The last thing he needed was either Charlotte or, god forbid, Alerik, to come around the corner and see him slacking off or making some insanely stupid mistake. The few times Hero had walked past, Hawk had pulled the tendril back only a bit before resuming. 

He had been at it for hours before he noticed any remarkable progress on the shield. At the same time, he had sent another wave of energy to the crate that was by the chained door, bringing it to sit next to the shield. His plan was to unseal it the moment the shield fell, letting Hero know exactly how he felt and why he was such a moron for not having let him know sooner.

“Hawk.” Charlotte’s voice startled him, causing him to falter slightly in both tasks at hand. He glared up at her from where he was stocking pizza on the bottom shelf. She gave him an equally disparaging look. “I need to talk to you.”

Hawk looked around him. “Seriously? Here?”

She rolled her eyes. “Not everything has to do with your probation, numbnuts. Let’s go.”

A large crack ran through the shield right then and Hawk’s confidence began to soar. Not much longer now…

Charlotte led him to the back, near the rear freezer door where they wouldn’t be seen. “What are you doing right now?” she asked, as though she were a mother walking in on her teenage son doing something suspicious. Even her arms were crossed and her head was tilted to the side as she stared up at him. In the context of it all, that’s exactly what was happening. 

“Working,” he said, narrowing his eyes. “What are you doing right now?”

“Wondering why my charge is using a vast amount of power in the middle of a public area, that’s what.”

Hawk tensed but didn’t stop the energy from what it was doing. The shield would be down in no time, he couldn’t afford to stop.

“I’m under control,” he said in a low voice. 

“That’s not even the issue. I want to know why you’re using it in the first place.”

“Whole lot of none of your business, that’s what.”

She nodded. “I see. So it’s about Hero, then.”

The tendril froze as Hawk’s blood ran cold. “What do you know about Hero?”

She grinned, the tip of her tongue touching the corner of her upper lip. “I know he’s been quiet and distant the last few days and is making a highly concerted effort to avoid you. What did you do?”

“Nothing.”

Another crack formed; the tendril resumed its work.

“What did you say?”

“Nothing…”

She nodded again. “Hm. And the power you’re using right now, is it to hurt him?”

His eyes blazed. “I would never hurt Hero.”

“Is that so?” She shifted her weight and put her hands behind her back. “Do you think he would hurt you?”

“Not in a million years.”

“What if I made him?”

Hawk’s hand was at her throat, pinning her against the large freezer door faster than she could blink. “You won’t touch one hair on his head, or lay one disgusting finger on his mind if you know what’s good for you,” he snarled, his fangs growing, his pupils narrowing to slits and three marks appearing over his forehead.

“What’s good for me,” she cooed, “is watching you squirm.” She reached out with her tongue, flicking it across the tip of his nose. He drew his head back in disgust. “There is no reason in any Realm you deserve to be happy, Your Majesty,” she hissed. “Not after everything you’ve done.”

His face broke out in a wide, menacing grin. “You’re jealous, aren’t you?” he said. “Are you for real?” He leaned in closer, squeezing her neck tighter. “You think just because I fucked you once that means you get to lay a claim on me?” His voice was low and barely above a whisper.

Her bright amber eyes narrowed, darkened with hate, and she snarled. “Why would I ever be jealous of some pretty little golden-haired human?” Her eyes jumped, giving her away.

“That’s why you told him…” he said, as another large crack appeared in the shield. “You were trying to warn him away from me. You’ve been trying shady little tricks for months with him, you think I don’t know?”

“You don't—”

“STAY AWAY FROM HIM!” he bellowed, punching the door right by her head, her eyes going wide with fright.

The shield fell. Instantly, he could feel Hero’s energy waves, he knew where he was, could feel his heartache. He couldn’t unseal the crate in time before he felt Hero stop where he was, freeze, and hurry back…

Hurry back in his direction…

His heart stopped…shit…

Charlotte saw the change immediately. Her eyes went cold and her face turned to stone as she placed the tip of one finger in the center of his chest. Instantly, he was flooded with ice, frozen in place, unable to move or speak.

“Let me make this as clear as crystal for you, Hawk Helman,” she said. “You threaten me again, and I won’t just play with that boy…” she leaned in close, placing her lips to his ear. “I’ll kill him right in front of you.”

Hero was getting close…he could hear his voice calling out, looking for him.

“L-let me g-go…” he pleaded. “P-please…Hero can’t—”

Don’t let him see me like this! He can’t see me like this!

Charlotte grinned. “So we have an understanding then? Good. Don’t forget, Majesty, you’re still under my control and the stipulations of the contract still stand. This is the last time I give you a pass on using your powers. In control or not, you’re still forbidden from using them at all.” She took her finger from his chest, releasing the ice spell. 

He collapsed against the door as she slid out from under his arm, his power slowly receding back into his core, along with his demon form. He stood there, shaking, panting for breath as she walked away.

“Oh, and thank you for holding back,” she said. “I can’t afford to have those doors replaced just yet.”

Hawk’s eyes went to the dent in the door. He really had held back, only because they were in public. He could hear Hero’s voice, asking Charlotte if she had seen Hawk just now.

“Yeah, we were just talking actually,” she said brightly. “He’s by the rear freezer door.”

Hawk slid to the floor, turning to sit against the door just as Hero appeared, his face crumpling as he saw Hawk, falling on his knees in front of him.

Hawk pulled him to his chest, holding on to him as tightly as he could. “I’m sorry,” he said into his hair. “I’m sorry, Hero.”

Hero shook his head. “Don’t be. I shouldn’t have ignored you like that. I can’t imagine how much pain I caused you.”

“Quite a lot, if I’m honest.” He dipped his head, kissing Hero’s neck. “But it was worth it to hold you again.”

“How did you do it?”

“I used some of my power to knock it down.”

Hero slowly backed away, looking at him confused. “What do you mean by that?”

Hawk swallowed. “Hero, there’s a lot I want to tell you, that I haven’t for some pretty selfish, and other very serious reasons. I’ll start with the easier ones and ask that you trust me on the bigger ones later.”

Hero nodded. “Okay,” he said without hesitation. 

Hawk’s eyebrow twitched. “Really? Just like that?”

Hero smiled. “Just like that.”

“Why?”

Hero stood and helped Hawk to his feet. “You left the crate behind.” 

Checking that there was no one around, Hawk pulled Hero into his arms, loving the feeling of Hero’s arms going around his neck, his hands in Hawk’s hair and Hawk held him as close as he could. 

“I’ll open it later at home.”

Hero nodded. “I need to get back to work.”

“Me, too.”

Neither of them let go for another couple minutes. It was Alerik’s voice over the PA system that spoiled the moment. “Hawk, you’re needed back on the freezer floor. Hawk to the floor.”

Hero unwound himself from Hawk, amused at the glower on his face. 

“I’m putting shaving cream in his coffee.”

“He doesn’t drink coffee.”

“Fine, I’ll put it in his tea.” He was turning to the main front freezer door, when he tugged on Hero’s hand, bringing him back to him. “Tell me again. Say it again.”

Hero smiled. “Later.”