What I desire is you dead Lady Alindell…

But it’s not as if I could say that, feeling as she gripped my arm and looked at me, it’s as if she could see right through me, and that made me want to wrap my hands around her neck.

“I desire the truth.” Was what I managed to mutter out, soon regretting it when she responded kindly. 

“The truth? Well, truthfully I can’t help but feel you wish I was a man.” 

Something about this woman created a craving inside me, a need to push her down a flight of stairs, or perhaps bury her in the dirt. 

“It’s a shame really, I feel like we wouldn’t be compatible though, after all, I can only assume I would be much larger than you.” She put her hand to her face and dramatically signed.

That settles it, I’m killing her first when the time comes, I had gotten news from Wilkins that it turned out to be true that the Baron and Baroness were accepting gold to keep the secret of the Late Queen's true passing. 

Her little teasing grin would be wiped right off her face when she was forced to watch herself die. 

“Oh, Clementine my sweet.” She said as she walked over, letting go of my arm to scoop up the cat, holding it in her arms. 

“Why are you outside so late? You’re usually fast asleep by now in Father's study.” 

Watching the lady speak to a cat and laugh, I can’t help but feel but an inch of pity. 

To think this girl would die by my sword for simply being related to her horrid parents. 

“I’d let you hold her too Count, but I know how much you despise pussy.” 

And with that, my remorse is gone and your demise has sped up. 

“I don’t know where you got that idea…” Stepping forward I take Clementine from her arms. 

The cat climbs my chest and surrounds my shoulders, perching herself as if she were a scarf. 

“I adore felines.” 

Watching her mouth open wide with that little annoying nose scrunch she does, I bring my hand to her chin, closing her mouth as I take her arm. 

“Shall we continue?” I quickly say, ignoring the giggles filled with a vulgar imagination following her. 

Finishing our stroll, she curtseyed and gave me her goodbyes as she left. I stayed holding Clementine who had long shed white fur all along my vest. 

Walking back to my room, I met Wilkins along the way who had a lot to say. 

“Did you enjoy your afternoon with Lady Alindell?” Wilkins had always favored that girl, from the day he started working here he said she wasn’t like the other ladies, and he’s right, she’s no lady, she’s a mutt. 

“Enjoy is a stretch, and you, what did you find?” I had been here for a week, and he had been here for a few years, but he still had yet to find any proof of the bribery, as if any documentation had disappeared. 

“Nothing much, all I know for certain is they are involved, but as to how is a mystery to even me.” Wilkins said, walking a pace behind the Count. 

Taking a breath, even a little was more than enough to kill them. “I see, all that matters is that it’s probable, and that’s more than enough to strike.” 

“I do hope you’ll consider the Lady, at least making her death painless.” 

Wilkins couldn’t help but always try to fit me with a woman, but no sane woman would accept me for who I am, especially after I murdered her entire family. 

That very evening I sat in my room, the sky was a starry blue and purple, feeling as the warm summer wind caressed my face I brought a glass of honey lemon wine up to my lips. 

At first, I wondered how a mere Baron would have so many assets, and then the moment I tasted their wine I understood.

As much as I hated to admit it, in all his filthy glory the swine could age an excellent wine. 

Rubbing the bridge between my eyes, I could hardly stay away, it was so close, I would lop off the head of every noble and servant here. 

Is what I thought until I smelled the sweet tender smell of lemon custard floating in the air, at first I had thought my mind was playing tricks, and then I stood up. 

Who was awake this late in the evening? I knew for a fact all the servants were asleep. 

Looking out my window, the smell was coming from the floor directly below mine, the kitchen it seemed. 

I thought it to be my chef, but he wouldn’t do such a thing without orders, and this certainly wasn’t my order. 

Walking down to the lower floor, I peeked in to see none other than Clementine on the counter, the oven was lit, and the smell of lemon custard and baking tarts stuck itself in my mind. 

“Oh? Count? What brings you here this late at night?” 

Spinning around, I saw the Lady behind me, she wore her nightgown and an apron, and promptly I looked away, to think she would dress this immodestly while a guest was in her manor confused me to my very core. 

“It’s not like anything but my ankles are showing, stop being such a flower and come in.”

She teased as she walked by me, this girl, why I should simply toss her in the oven! 

After a deep breath, I managed to look at her, it’s true she was mostly dressed, but I couldn’t help but feel awkward in her presence, I had never seen a woman in such attire, nor did I ever think I would. 

“I felt like tarts would go well with this new strand of wine I’m testing for Father.” 

Slipping her mitts on, she pulled the sweets from the oven which were warmed to perfection.

It made sense a country bumpkin like her would know how to cook, after all, they weren’t always this well off. 

They got richer once the Late Queen passed, and that thought only soured my mood. 

“Care for a drink? And perhaps a snack?” Humming, she began putting the tarts to the side as she stepped on a stool, and opened a small barrel filled with the sweetest smell I had ever imagined, it was like pure nectar and I hadn’t even tasted it, but my tongue began to salivate. 

“No…it’s far too late for a drink….”

“Oh come on now, nobody will tell.” She teased. 

But she poured me a drink anyway, in mismatched tea cups she stole from the cabinet, but who am I to complain, after all, nobody knows their wine like the Alindell’s do, even if they are a horrid family. 

“Very well.” I sigh, bringing a stool up, then again, this may be a perfect opportunity. 

I had know the woman for about a week, but never did I once think to ask if she knew where her father may keep documents. 

While I know she isn’t involved in the whole ordeal, the least she can do is assist me before I kill her, and perhaps I’ll make it quick. 

I almost laugh as I stare at her, plotting when my mind goes blank. 

This is the best wine I’ve ever tasted….

With the teacup on my lips, I stop, stunned, it was godly, wine that royals would sip upon every day, they probably do. 

“This is our family’s little secret, it’s not for sale, nor does anyone know, it’s my mother's way of getting petty revenge on all the nobles that mocked her for being a whore.” 

Turning my head, I looked at her, I had heard rumors that the Baroness was a woman of the brothel, but I never bothered to ask or figure out more. 

“You can’t choose what life you’re born into, nobles don’t seem to understand that, so we drink with ourselves.” 

I watch as she takes a warm tart fresh from the oven, she doesn’t seem to mind the heat, and as much as I hate to admit it, if I were to try one it would burn my tongue. 

This is my second cup of wine tonight, I had always had a low tolerance, but I never thought I’d be dizzy this fast. 

Looking at the Lady who was chugging away, it was clear she didn’t add anything to it, she simply drank like her father did, as if they were a fish in water. 

By the time I finished one, she was on her fourth, giggling as her soft skin tinted pink. 

Now was as good a time as any. 

“Lady Alindell, would you happen to kn-“

Before I could even finish, she was out cold slamming her head into the table, I stared for a good long minute, was she alive?

Standing, I tried not to sway, and walked over to her, feeling her neck, she was alive and asleep, was she going to leave this mess for the servants? 

Looking around I see the mess of lemons, bowls, and spoons still covered in the tart filling, what a selfish girl. 

“Count…..” She mumbled. 

Stopping, I look down, staring at her little lips that mumble my name. 

“I….I don’t have a cock…..”

And I’m leaving here.

Standing up, I put my cup to the side and walk out, I don't care what happens to this girl, as long as she doesn’t exist when I wake up.