Chapter Seven – Asking Never Killed Anyone

The only vulnerable thing about himself Jamie knew about was completely unrelated to sex and hooking up with guys. He played with the nice-looking card, taking in each letter and tracing it with his fingers. Well, it didn’t hurt to try, right? He pulled out his phone and started typing the number.

The voice at the other end had the same drawl he remembered from the night of his last gig with the band.

“Hello, Mr. Kallis,” he said in his most formal voice. “My name is Jamie Vayne. I don’t know if you remember me, but you watched me perform with my band The Wicked Mitches of the West. I was wondering if you could give me an honest evaluation of my performance.”

“Jamie, of course,” Arthur replied, and his voice showed genuine pleasure. “I was hoping you’d call. The night of your gig I had to leave early because of a phone call I received.”

That was a reasonable explanation. He had felt tempted to believe that the A&R guy had been unimpressed by his performance, and thus there was no chance for him to hope for anything to come of it.

“I will give you an evaluation,” Arthur continued. “But not like this, over the phone. We should meet in person.”

After a few details were exchanged, Jamie agreed to a day and hour for seeing Arthur at a coffee shop close to his label's offices. It would be a trip, but it would be worth it if he at least got some pointers on how to improve his act, be it from a musical standpoint or whatever made musicians become stars.

His confidence restored, Jamie began browsing through the app of his choice for guys on campus looking for a bit of fun. Even though he hadn’t intended to check the wacko’s profile, an inexplicable force drew him to it. The guy appeared to have been inactive since the last time Jamie got in contact with him, which pleased him. In his profile details, Jamie noticed a link to what looked like a personal website. Some guys used such things to post more pictures and eventually gently – or more aggressively – guide their possible hookups toward greener pastures for them, so it wasn’t unusual.

However, Jamie didn’t believe that the bunny boy in question was into selling extra content when he had barely popped his streaming cherry by licking Jamie’s ass live for an audience. Still, his curiosity was tickled enough for him to follow the link and endure the seconds needed for displaying the message warning him that he was leaving the app.

It was a freaking diary. Jamie felt his lips quirking into a knowing smile. Cottontail was such a freak. He used the Internet to overshare using methods from a decade ago.

The last entry was called…

Twelve Ways to Eat an Ass

Twelve, right. Jamie snorted and began reading.

Last night, I ate an ass for the first time in my life. I can’t describe the feeling as anything other than tasting the forbidden fruit. The ass in question belongs to a man who makes your mouth water from the first glance.

Dreamy is hardly a fitting term to describe him. I wish I could capture his essence, but that would depend on his allowing me to do so.

The story continued with a lot of flowery language Jamie didn’t care for. It was as if a maiden from the nineteenth century was talking about her first ball, but using terms that would have better described the flutter of butterflies felt for the first time.

If you have read up to this point, you most likely have realized that the title of this entry was merely clickbait. I apologize to you for that, unknown reader. I was too caught up in the act to analyze my technique. I will post updates if this budding relationship continues.

There were no comments under the entry, and as Jamie scrolled through the rest of the blog posts, it looked like no one actually read the guy’s online diary. No other titles intrigued him enough to read them, as it looked like the wacko had the same convoluted mind while writing his thoughts as he had when acting and talking in real life. Sure enough, since the link had been added to the bunny’s profile recently, it could only mean that Cottontail had definitely intended for him to see it.

Jamie grinned in self-satisfaction as he looked at the screen. The guy was a professional ass-licker. However, he needed to write some proper blog posts without sounding like he was from a different era. Since he had no audience whatsoever, it didn’t matter, but Jamie wanted to give the rabbit something back.

He hit the comment button.

“Nice entry. Although I’m a bit peeved about not learning about the 12 ways to eat an ass. Do you write fantasy? Because there’s no way a guy with ‘eyes like cornflowers in bloom’ and ‘a smile that could make angels sing’ exists in this day and age. Prove me wrong.”

To post the comment, he needed to provide a username.

cynicalass

That should do it. If Cottontail asked him about whether or not he had visited his blog, Jamie would act like he had no idea what the guy was talking about.

Two could play this game.

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