“All yours,” said Lom as he exited the bathroom. He walked over to his bag, bent down, and began searching for something. 

Fah watched in disbelief. How was he so casual and unembarrassed? Why didn’t he want to talk about what they had done? Fah certainly did. At the same time, he wondered if he would look foolish asking to discuss it.

“Thanks,” said Fah as he entered the bathroom. He showered quickly, brushed his teeth, and shaved. He wondered what Lom was doing and if he noticed the stripped-down bed. Even if he had, it probably didn’t make him feel awkward. 

He decided to be brave and face Lom. He walked out of the bathroom and looked around. Lom wasn't anywhere. He got dressed and brushed his hair while discreetly looking around the apartment. 

He noticed Lom’s bag was also gone. Had Lom left? Somehow that thought made Fah feel dirty. Maybe Lom was as uncomfortable as Fah was and, not knowing what to say, returned home. 

The door to the condo opened and in walked his missing guest. 

“Hey, I put my stuff in the car since I have to head back today. Do you want to grab breakfast somewhere?” Lom smiled and Fah relaxed.

“Sure, sounds good. Let me call Manao.” 

“Can you not? No offense, but I don’t want to see her. After I leave, you can spend the rest of the day holding hands and feeding each other.” He smiled at Fah. 

“We’re not like that all the time. Fine, I’ll call her after you’re gone.”  

They found a small restaurant close by. They ate and talked about old friends from high school and laughed about stupid things they had done as kids. Soon they were chatting and laughing as if they had never become estranged. Although the conversation flowed easily Fah kept hoping Lom would bring up their morning activity. He desperately wanted to understand how Lom felt about him and what it meant. 

Several times he considered reaching across the table and holding Lom’s hand. Somehow that seemed more relationship-based whereas their bedroom activity had been purely sexual. 

Perhaps Lom was one of those people who liked sex but avoided relationships and that was why he easily dismissed what they had done. He forced himself to stop thinking about it and pay attention to the conversation. 

Lom regaled Fah with a tale about the time he hacked into the school’s website and replaced the photo of a teacher who failed him with a photo of a buffalo. He noticed Fah getting ready to say something several times and it looked serious. 

He probably wants to talk about this morning, thought Lom. It was no big deal, just two friends helping each other get rid of a little stress. Leave it to Fah to think it’s something we need to discuss. He’s probably feeling guilty that he did something with someone other than Manao. It was nice but it's not as if I have feelings for him.

Every time it appeared Fah might bring up the topic, Lom told a new story. He was a master of this as he used this tactic with one-night stands who wanted more. He never thought he’d have to use it on Fah. 

He wasn’t sure if he was being narcissistic but he even thought Fah wanted to hold his hand. Each time he sensed it, he put his hands on his lap until Fah gave up. He felt guilty but he was still confused about everything himself and he didn’t want to say or do anything that would cause the two of them to stop speaking again.

They paid the bill and walked back to Fah’s condo. In the parking lot, Lom stopped by his car.

“Are you leaving now?” asked Fah, staring down at his hands. He wanted to hang out for another few hours; he was having so much fun and didn't want it to end. It had been a long time since he laughed with anyone. Manao was kind but always serious.

“Yeah, I have to. Dad wants me to do a couple of things today. Plus, I need to tell Dad about Manao.”

“Don’t. Please don’t. As I said, I'm not sure what will happen in the future. I don’t want to mention marriage if I’m not going to go through with it. Plus, I don’t think you’ll give Dad an unbiased opinion of her.” 

“You know I won’t. I'll tell him the truth. Is she pretty? Yes. Is she boring? Yes. Is she a prude? Yes, according to you. Will she make a good wife? For a politician, yes. For you, no. You need someone who will excite you, be adventurous, someone who isn’t plastic.”  Fah thought the description of who he needed to marry sounded a lot like Lom. 

“Okay, okay, I give up. I won’t force the two of you to spend time together ever again!” said Fah. Lom pulled him in for a hug. They stood together hugging each other in silence. Finally, Lom pushed him away. 

“Okay brother, take care of yourself."

"Brother?" said Fah, his soft voice trailing off. Lom continued speaking as if he hadn't heard him.

"Come home next weekend, if you can. Mom and Dad want to see you.” 

Fah wondered if Lom’s use of brother was natural or if he was trying to send him a message that that was all they were. Realizing Lom was no longer speaking, he replied. 

“I will. Please let them know I was trying not to be a burden. I feel awful that they thought I was ashamed of them.”  

“Okay, I’ll tell them. Bye, brother.” Lom turned to leave. 

His eyebrows knit together, Fah ran his hand through his hair as he thought, Brother again, he never refers to me as brother and now twice in one conversation.

“Hey Lom,” yelled Fah. Lom inhaled deeply before he turned around. “I’m glad we got together; I missed this. Thanks for making the first move.” Lom gave a curt nod of his head and smiled.  Fah walked into the building and forbade himself to turn around as Lom sped out of the parking lot.

Several days later, Fah’s phone rang. Once again Manao was calling. As much as he wanted to avoid her, he knew he had to deal with the situation. He spoke to her briefly several times after Lom’s visit, but each time he made excuses to avoid spending time with her. 

Since Lom's departure, he was all that Fah could think about. Fah was unsure if he was gay. He had no idea if Lom was gay or if Lom was attracted to him. He didn’t have anything with which to compare their morning together. Every time he laid down to sleep, he found himself reliving that morning with Lom and masturbating. 

I wonder what Lom would say if I told him that he was the star of my spank bank? This thought made Fah burst out laughing. Okay, either I’m into guys. Or I'm bi. I need to have sex with a girl and a guy and discover which I like.  

He picked his phone up and called Manao.

“Oh, I called you a few minutes ago, but you didn’t pick up,” Manao said.

“Sorry sweetie, I was in the bathroom and missed your call. What’s up?”

“I wanted to invite you to come have dinner with my family tonight. Dad is going to grill some prawns. After dinner, we could watch a movie with my brothers if you want.” 

“I’m not up for being around a lot of people tonight. How about you come here? We can order in, watch a movie, and maybe pretend we’re married?”

Silence. He decided to let it sink in and said nothing.

“Are you asking me for sex?” Manao sounded so shocked Fah thought he might laugh out loud.

“Yes, Manao. I’m asking for sex. I think I’ve been patient for three years and we’ve never moved past a goodnight kiss on the cheek.”

“I thought you were fine with waiting. You said you respected me for my conviction. Was it all a line to get me into bed?”

“How could it be a line? I’ve been dating you, only you, for three years. You know I’ve never cheated on you. I finally decided that I didn’t want to wait any longer and who did I ask to be with? You!” He held his phone in the air, staring at it. Maybe Lom was right, maybe Manao was one of those people who weren't interested in sex. 

“Fah, you knew wedding night meant wedding night, not a minute sooner. Why are you suddenly so interested in having sex? Did your brother say something?” 

“It has nothing to do with my brother. I think I’ve been pretty damn patient and I was hoping by this point in our relationship you would realize that if we slept together, I wouldn’t dump you afterward.”

“Fah, I’m not discussing this anymore. When you’re ready to be the man you used to be, call me. Until then, I don’t want to hear from you,” and with that, she hung up the phone.

Fah stared at the phone in his hand. She still didn’t trust him? Fine. He was a handsome guy; girls were always hitting on him. He could find at least one who would be willing to have sex. Where, though? If he had sex with another girl from school, it would cause problems with Manao. He’d never cheated on her. 

If he was able to find out if he liked sex with women without cheating, he’d do it in a heartbeat. Then it hit him – a brothel! That was his best option. A lot of his friends at school had been to them. After all, he could have sex there and not worry about the girl showing up on campus and causing problems. He grabbed his keys and phone and headed out.