Contains:

     - Mild language

     - Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) traits

Mentions:

     - Eating Disorder traits

If you, or someone you know is struggling with an eating disorder, contact the National Alliance for Eating Disorders' helpline (+1-866-662-1235), or the ANAD helpline (+1-888-375-7767), for help. You can also go online for assistance at:

My Sunday afternoon was like any other, except one thing:

Akihito-kun¹ texted me saying he was off work early.

Which meant our date wasn't cancelled. Given that it was supposed to be in an hour, I had to hurry. Like most guys, he believes my beauty is effortless.

And like most guys, he'd be wrong. However, today is not the day I wish to prove this point.

I pick out a cute skirt and top from my closet, skillfully apply my makeup, then move on to styling my hair. I usually keep it down whenever I'm with Akihito because he says it makes me look more mature for my age, but on the other hand, my classmates say that I look more cute with it up. So I compromise with a half-ponytail, finishing it with a simple twist. I make sure to add some decorative pins to it and spritz my favorite perfume.

I touch-up my look with some cute accessories and jewelry, thankful I hadn't yet removed my acrylic nails from Golden Week². Their design matches my attire perfectly. Looking myself over in the head-to-foot mirror hanging near my bedroom door, I inspect for any imperfections.

Like my palor skin.

The flab around my belly.

My crooked nose.

The freckles on my cheeks.

My unsymmetrical eyes.

My dull, dry hair.

All of which my skillful wardrobe adjustments and makeup magic help hide from the public eye. Because after all, what's beauty without a little pain³?

Only after I look reasonably presentable, do I finally decide to leave my room.

                                              ~ ~ ~

Baba⁴ is in the kitchen when I walk past. The aroma of her homemade dorayaki⁵ lingers within the walls of the house, their delightful scent wafting past my nose. My stomach betrays me by growling. Luckily, Baba is still in the process of making them, and is too far away to hear it. But what she does hear, however, is me getting ready to leave.

"{Girls?}" she inquires, unsure which one of us she has heard.

I let out a sigh. I had hoped to avoid confrontation this time. Lying usually comes easily enough for me. After all, I do have my reputation to maintain on a daily basis, and being popular is certainly no easy task. Aggravate, befriend, or date the wrong person, and you're dropped faster than last year's Lisa dress.

But Baba is my kryptonite. Always has been.

She's always been on our side, and the closest thing we've ever had to a mother, since our actual one couldn't be bothered to stick around. She's more lenient than most parents would be with girls our age, and has never restricted me on what I can and can't wear, or the makeup I use, as long as it's all in good taste⁶. Meanwhile, other teen daughters are expected to have zero sex-appeal, fashion taste, or popularity, and are forced to live like nuns.

Or worse, they choose to.

I pretend not to hear her, and hurry to put on my shoes,⁷ but hesitate when I notice an unfamiliar girl wearing strange clothes, trespassing through our front garden.

Why is it so hard for people to respect personal boundaries?!

It's probably just some weirdo tourist again, but that's no excuse! I'm about to open the door and tell her off,⁸ but her vibrant vermillion hair catches me off-guard. So much so, that I forget myself for a second, not realizing Baba is calling for me.

"{Yumi? Yumi, is that you?}" she calls out from the kitchen. I snap myself out of the trance and respond in kind, as she wipes off her hands with a towel. I then turn back to look outside again, but the girl is already gone.

Well, that works out just swimmingly⁹.

Good riddance!

Baba reaches me by this point, curious if I'm leaving. She was under the impression that I would be here for the whole day. And until about forty-five minutes ago, so did I. She's a smart woman and I know my shoes have already given her the answer, but I nicely reply anyway, like any good daughter would.

"{Chiyo-chan and Hana-chan want to go to karaoke.}"

I hate lying to her, but I know she wouldn't approve of what I'm actually about to do. Baba may be pretty relaxed, compared to my friend's thirty-something-aged parents, but I think they would all agree that being alone unsupervised with a boy would be a firm "no" in their playbooks.

"{But I'll be back in time for dinner tonight, I promise,}" I reassure her. This last part is true, at least.

¹ KANJI "Akihito" ( アキヒト ) is a boy's given name meaning "." and "."

² Golden Week: A series of holidays which tend to fall within the same seven day period in Japan, typically running from April 29th to May 5th. Known literally as "Ōgon Shūkan" ( 黄金週間 or おうごんしゅうかん ), but may also be referred to as "Haru no Ōgata Renkyū" ( 春の大型連休 or おおがたれんきゅう ) which roughly translates to "long spring holiday series". Golden Week is basically Spring Break in Japan. Because of the amount of time off from school, some students will do things against school regulations while on the vacation, such as having fancy jeweled manicures, wearing earrings, wearing certain clothes / accessories, cutting / styling / dying their hair a certain way, etc. All of which are normally not allowed in school. However, they have to "fix" whatever they do, before returning to school. It's a small form of short-term rebellion.

³ "There is no beauty without pain": A variation of the 19th-century French expression, "il faut souffrir pour être belle," which loosely translates to "one must suffer to be beautiful". Also famously referred to by author Blake Crouch, in his book "Summer Frost".

⁴ Baba ( ばば ): The informal nickname that the Miyazaki twins use for their grandmotherly maternal caretaker, Narumi-san. It is a very informal way of saying "grandmother" in Japanese (similar to "granny" in English), which she doesn't mind because she's over sixty years old. In this case, the term is used as a form of endearment, but in Japan today (roughly two decades later), the term now has more of a negative connotation, so normally "sobo" ( 祖母 ) is used instead. Not to be confused with the term "soba" ( 蕎麦 or そば ), which is a buckwheat noodle.

⁵ Dorayaki ( 銅鑼焼き or どらやき ): A type of traditional Japanese confectionery sweet (known as "wagashi" or 和菓子 ) that consists of red bean paste (known as "anko" or 餡子 ) sandwiched in between two small fluffy pancakes. Narumi-san sometimes makes them with matcha cream or other fillings instead.

⁶ "In good taste":  A phrase about something that is considered pleasing, appropriate, and generally accepted by social or aesthetic standards, free from vulgarity or offensiveness. It often implies a sense of refinement, elegance, and appropriateness for the situation, aligning with commonly held values of what is considered proper and admirable in a given context.

⁷ Genkan ( 玄関 or げんかん ): In Japan, it is custom to remove your shoes before coming into the house. Most houses and apartments have a genkan, or entranceway area, and outdoor shoes are kept there.

⁸ "Telling someone off": An idiom used to describe firmly reprimanding a person for their wrong-doing or misbehavior. Sometimes involves yelling, but not always. Also known as "straightening someone out", "giving someone a talking to", "letting them have it", "giving them a piece of my mind", or "having a stern word" with someone.

⁹ Works out swimmingly: When something goes well or as planned. The phase can also be used sarcastically at times to mean the opposite. Context should be taken into account.

¹⁰ Bento: The more casual term for obento. This is a boxed lunch (usually with portion separaters) and comes ready-to-eat. There are many different types (rice bowls, vegetable plates, soups, etc), and can be either homemade or bought from a convenience store. They are also considered a type of meal-prep.

¹¹ Torii gate: A traditional Japanese gate, representing the gateway between the secular world of humans, and the spiritual realm of kami (deities). Usually at the entrance of a Shinto shrine, but sometimes they are located on an old private property with strong Shinto roots, and one that has their own family shrine. Most torii tend to be either bare wood or painted, but the shape is always the same. If painted, it's usually either white, or red with black. If the shrine has a long walking path before reaching the main entrance (such as ones located in the forrest or mountains), there are usually multiple torii present, to help mark the way.