Chapter 18

What was life like for me before the game? 

Lonely.

I never would have admitted it at the time, but looking back, it was lonely. I had a lonely childhood and that led to a lonely adulthood.  

At some point I didn't really ever leave the house. I didn't have a reason to. Right after highschool I found a job coding for some company. I was making enough on my own, so I moved out. 

It seemed perfect to me, my work lets me do everything from home. I had everything I needed delivered, so I never needed to leave. 

One day, I heard about a new game coming out. They were sending out invitations for the beta testing. I applied for it  like everyone else, then I realized I wasn't going to get an invitation. I wasn't worried though. It was so easy having the invitations sent to me instead of someone else. 

It was even easier finding spoilers on the game. I was able to learn about the character creator, the goal of the game, and how to make the best character. 

The character creator was fairly unique. Depending on what skills you chose you would become either a mage, rogue, or warrior. Becoming any of these classes would limit your abilities, but if you dumped all of your stats under one skill you would unlock another option. You would get the ‘god class’. God class characters could act as mages, rogues, or warriors. It would essentially make your character unbeatable once you leveled up enough. 

The only issue I found was the special skill. I couldn't figure out how to choose it myself. It would be random and I would have needed to steal multiple invitations to get more than one shot at getting a good one.

When I finally entered the game I was pleasantly surprised though. I saw my skill was prophetic dreams. Seeing the future? I thought I hit the jackpot. 

As soon as the game started I activated my skill. All I had to do was fall asleep. 

The first time was amazing. It was like some dream sequence in a movie. Everything seemed to have faded and looked dull. I explored for the entire day, but nothing actually happened. I didn't see any people, and I didn't understand how this was seeing in the future. It was pretty boring actually. 

I was so immersed in the game that it took me forever to realize that I couldn't log out. I figured it was a glitch, and it must be because I hadn't exited the dream yet. So I tried everything. Literally, everything I could think of. 

I was trapped. 

I wandered around like that for a month, unable to do anything but observe a frozen world around me. Then, I saw him. The only person I had ever seen in game. To say I was excited is an understatement, I cried. I sobbed harder than I ever had before. I was so happy to see him. 

Kendrick. 

I started to see the shadows of the people he interacted with. I could hear them call his name, and I could hear everything he said. 

I couldn't interact with him though. He couldn't feel me or hear me. I was like a ghost to him, just haunting him. 

I soon realized that everyone had been trapped in the game, and that the ‘world’ had momentarily gone to hell. He and his brother had created a guild devoted to trying to end the game.

I followed him for the entire day and learned so much, and then, I woke up. 

Just like that, my endless hell was over. 

I was so relieved and happy, until I remembered that this would happen every time I slept. 

So I tried to not sleep. 

I found that I could last three days, after that point I would accidentally fall asleep. 

The second time I dreamed I focused on trying to find a person. I didn't waste time looking at things or trying to find loot, I just looked for who I needed to follow. 

It took me five days, but I eventually found him. 

Kendrick. 

It was Kendrick again. Would it always be him? He was nowhere near the location he was at last time, but I did get some clues as to where he would go next. 

So began a weird quest where I stalked this man. It was a weird desperation. My waking hours and sleeping hours were spent thinking and looking for him. All so I wouldn't be trapped in a dream world alone. 

By the fourth dream-walk I was certain that I was only following Kendrick, and that I needed to look for the clues to where he would be next. The visions seemed to show one day in advance, so it was important to wake up and move as quickly as I could. I needed to get closer to where he was. 

He was always on the move with his brother. He visited each town, all of the ruins, even some places that were out in the middle of nowhere. 

Even though it was frustrating, I would always feel this sense of relief when I finally found him. 

On the day when Kendrick met Faust and Fenton I had finally gotten close enough that I could make it to him in one day. I had planned on trying to convince him to let me join his guild, but then, they had found the artifact.

This threw off my plan. I didn't know what to do, if I went and told him…would he believe me? Would that mess something up?  I finally decided it would be more helpful for me to sleep again. If I slept I would know how to help them after they found the artifact.

I didn't realize that time would rewind though.

It was a strange experience, seeing the same day a fourth time. Though, nothing was stranger than finally seeing Kendrick in real life.

I was so excited that I was tempted to run up and hug him. The urge was so strong, but I held myself back. I knew it would be strange. I knew I needed to introduce myself correctly. I knew I should wait until Kendrick walked away so I could talk with Faust.

I didn't know for sure, but I had a feeling Faust might have been a ‘god class’ character too. I just wasn't sure what his skill was.

After I introduced myself, it went smoothly…

“And who do we have here?”

The familiar sound of Kendrick’s voice.

What expression was I making? How do I talk again? Am I sweating? Why am I so nervous?

My whole life had been revolving around this man who stood in front of me for the last few months. My every waking and sleeping moment was devoted to thinking about and looking for him. He had no idea how I felt right now as I stood before him. He just stood there smiling, looking at me.

He was looking at me, finally, looking at me.

“Now, here we are again. I'm the one watching over you.” Kendrick was sleeping next to me on the big bed. His face inches from my own. He had no idea how I felt. And I didn't feel brave enough to tell him. I brushed the hair out of his eyes, letting my fingers linger a little longer than I should. 

“I have the ability to see the future, and I don't even get to decide what I see.” I stared at his closed eyes, his long eyelashes quivering with a dream. "At this point…I think I'll even dream about you when we leave this game." I chuckled.

I would willingly dream about him. Every night, I would hope to see him. I had fallen so deep that it felt like I was doing something wrong. I hoped that he wouldn't mind. That he wouldn't be bothered by my feelings or overwhelmed by them. I hoped that if I stayed quiet he would just let me exist next to him. At this point that's all I wanted. I wanted to just exist and be seen by this amazing person. I wanted him to know I existed. To acknowledge me. 

That would be enough.

While I had slept I saw the next twenty four hours for Kendrick. I think being in this room made everything go by quickly. I knew he would sleep for about an hour, then the door would unlock for us. I knew how we would find Fenton and Faust and that we should do that before we did anything else. I knew we needed to enter the other six rooms before we could leave the house. 

What I didn't know was if this man would ever feel the same way I did. Could he ever…

Here I was, trapped in some haunted house, and I was worried about a boy. 

It was a very long hour.