ASIDE

If you’re thinking of taking up life as a vampire slayer, may I suggest you reconsider? I only mention it because if you’re NOT something a little (or a lot) more than just human it really sucks when someone lifts you off the ground by your throat.

Case in point; this asshole/rodeo-reject is trying to choke the shit out of me and I’ve never even seen him before. I mean…I’ve seen people in too-tight jeans and cowboy boots wearing white Stetsons before (I’ve been to Texas, after all) but I’ve never seen a cowboy-turned-vampire before. Nor have I done something to this jerk personally but he’s really, really angry at me and trying to draw out my murder. Normally I wouldn’t mind so much—as long as I’m unrestrained and my opponent is monologuing—because up until this point I’ve always found a way to escape such dreadful company. In any event, I’m sure the point is to make me suffer for one of my many indiscretions but as my attacker isn’t being particularly communicative all my wonderings are just plain conjecture.

Maybe he’s just trying to make my existence as painful as possible—get me to commit suicide and save the vampire community the trouble of confronting me—but even though the vampires find my existence…upsetting…that’s just too bad.

However, all that will be explained sooner or later, and this isn’t the part of the story you really want to hear. You want to hear about my love. And I want to tell you.