After the Kiss in the Park

Mizuki’s heart pounded as he pulled away from Nakano, breathless from the kiss. His cheeks burned, his mind spinning. For a fleeting moment, he thought—maybe, just maybe—Nakano felt the same way. The kiss felt real.

Nakano took a step back, looking at Mizuki with an unreadable expression. For a second, Mizuki’s hope soared, but then Nakano broke the silence.

"Well, that settles it. Now we’ve practiced the kiss for the play," Nakano said, rubbing the back of his neck casually. "We didn’t get to it during rehearsals, so... yeah. We’re good now."

Mizuki’s heart sank. His chest tightened painfully as Nakano’s words echoed in his head—just for practice. The warmth of the kiss faded, replaced by a cold emptiness.

"F-for the play?" Mizuki managed to say, forcing a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. "You ran after me, just to practice... the kiss?"

Nakano’s casual tone stung. Mizuki’s mind screamed at him to say something, to ask Nakano why he kissed him like that. But the words lodged in his throat, unable to escape. Nakano shrugged, stretching his arms above his head, seemingly unaware of the turmoil in Mizuki’s chest.

"I mean, after the rush of the game and you leaving, I felt...", Nakano paused for a second to think of what to say next. "It doesn't matter, at least now, we can do it on stage, right?" Nakano chuckled lightly- as if it were no big deal.

Mizuki felt the smile falter on his lips. He felt as though he wanted to cry —Then why did you run after me? Why did you kiss me like that? His hands trembled as he clenched them at his sides.

"Y-yeah, at least now we can do it on stage. You're r-right", Mizuki whispered, though his voice cracked. He turned away, blinking rapidly as his vision blurred from the tears welling up in his eyes. He couldn’t let Nakano see how much this hurt. "I-I guess we’re good now... so, I’ll see you tomorrow at rehearsal."

Mizuki felt as though his body didn't want to move as he put one foot in front of the other, his legs feeling weak beneath him. He started to walk, each step heavy as if he were sinking into the ground. Behind him, Nakano’s hand reached out, fingers twitching as if he wanted to stop Mizuki, to say something more. But he didn’t. He pulled his hand back, watching Mizuki disappear into the distance.

Mizuki’s Bedroom

Mizuki burst through his bedroom door, slamming it shut behind him. He stood there, leaning his back against the door, his breath coming in shaky gasps. The silence of his room pressed in on him, amplifying the ache in his chest. He brought a trembling hand to his lips, the sensation of Nakano’s kiss still lingering, haunting him.

"Why... why did you run after me just to say that?" Mizuki muttered to himself, his voice shaky. "Why did you kiss me...like that.. if it was just... for practice?"

He bit his lip, trying to suppress the sob rising in his throat. His heart felt like it was being ripped apart. He had wanted Nakano to say something—anything—that might hint at more. Something that might confirm the tiny glimmer of hope Mizuki had carried with him for so long. But Nakano’s words had crushed that hope, leaving Mizuki feeling foolish for ever believing in something more.

"God, I’m so stupid..." Mizuki whispered, his voice cracking. A tear slipped down his cheek, and he wiped it away harshly, angry at himself for crying.

What did you think was going to happen? he thought bitterly. That Nakano liked you? That he felt.. something?

He slid to the floor, pulling his knees up to his chest, burying his face in his arms. His whole body trembled as the tears fell freely now.

"You’re so stupid, Mizuki," he whispered to himself, his voice breaking with each word. "It was all for the play. It was never anything more."

Mizuki’s heart ached as he replayed Nakano’s casual words in his mind over and over again. The kiss that had meant so much to him... had meant nothing to Nakano. Just part of the script, just practice for the play. Nothing more.

But why did it feel so real? Mizuki thought, his tears soaking into his sleeves. Why did he kiss me like that? Was I imagining it? Did I want it to be something more so badly that I made it all up in my head?

He let out a shaky breath, his voice barely a whisper. "Why did I think... that he could ever like someone like me?"

Mizuki wiped his face with his sleeve, but the tears wouldn’t stop. He felt utterly alone, sitting there in the darkness of his room, with nothing but the bitter reality that Nakano’s kiss had meant nothing to him.

"Just for practice..." Mizuki murmured, his voice barely audible. He hugged his knees tighter, rocking slightly as he tried to hold himself together, but inside he was unraveling. "I should’ve known."