“No!” Cerys’ voice snapped like a clap of thunder, and the invisible force of her magic breezed past River, his skin pricking with a hot itch. She clenched her fists tightly, the cracks in her flesh almost appearing to spread wider with the shift of her muscles. “I’m not with them” she seethed through gritted teeth, “...Not anymore.

River mouth opened his shock, her admittance an unexpected shock.

“So you were a part of them?” He said and when his sister flinched, the puzzle he couldn’t grasp started to form together in his mind. “You left, they didn’t like that and now they are hunting you.”

“It’s not like that!”

“Then tell me what it is!” River roared, desperation and frustration overflowing his capacity for patience. His eyes sharply cut into Cerys, and momentarily her own anger faltered, leaving her surprised and slack-jawed from her brother’s outburst. River thought—hoped it would be enough to break his sister’s walls, but as quickly as her mouth fell open, it clenched shut.

She twisted away from him, her scowl turned to the window they had come through. He expected her to leave, and maybe she wanted to, but instead she sharply faced him with a furious desperation. “There are just some things I don’t want you to know about. Things I did, things I regret, things I can’t bear to have you know and look at me and see a monster instead of your sister!

“I know it’s bad, River, I know you want answers, and I know you feel you need them, but right now, it doesn’t benefit either of us. I need to keep you safe and I can’t do that if you don’t trust me.”

“I don’t trust you,” River stated and Cerys' eyes fell shut with defeat. “You left, Cerys, and you didn’t come back no matter how much I needed you—and fuck you, I did need you—and you left me for a fucking cult?!”

Cerys stammered wordlessly, face up to the ceiling for a response she wouldn’t find. “I came back!” She hopelessly said.

“But you left again!” He snapped back, his hands buried in his hair from his frustration. “And you’ll leave this time, again.”

“No!” Cerys grabbed River’s shoulders, knocking his arms down. He struggled to escape her grasp, her thin, scarred fingers tightly latched onto him. “I’m not leaving this time.”

“Like I’m going to believe that!”

“You aren’t safe now, I can’t leave—”

“I was never safe!” River shoved Cerys away from him, breaking her hold as she stumbled back but caught herself. Guilt struck River but his anger quickly buried it, boiling over and erupting like a burst dam. “I haven’t been safe since Dad died, Mum lost her mind and you left! Why did you leave?!”

River panted heavily, his heart beat in his ears, and fingers numb. He clenched his own fists and tried to slow his breathing, piercing daggers at Cerys from across the room. She swallowed dryly and let a trembling breath out. With a cautious step and a soft, remorseful look, she approached her brother. He stepped back, mouth parting to argue more but stilled when Cerys held her hands up defensively.

“Your grandparents only wanted you,” she confessed quietly and River’s eyes widened, a fresh wave of anger tingling up his spine, but this time not for her. “And I was a scared, dumb kid with no one to turn to. I didn’t want to cost you the chance of a good home so I left and found…” She winced, eyes closed with remorse twisting across her face. “I found the Everlasting Servants,” she admittedly clearly. “They offered me everything I needed, everything I wanted—a home, a family…”

“So why did you leave?” River asked, his voice taut.

Her attention shifted to her raised hands and she rubbed her scarred fingers together before black smoke appeared from them. “There’s a cost to the magic they wield. I left because I realised I had something left in my life,” she dropped her hand and flicked her eyes to River. “I lost so much of myself… I wasn’t going to lose you too.”

A venomous scoff left River, a smile forming on his face but far from reaching his eyes. “Right,” he said, “so abandoning me was better.”

“To protect you!” Desperation clung to each syllable of her words. “I know it makes no sense, but believe me, I came back for you the moment I fled, to take you with me but…” She spun away with a groan of frustration, hands dropping to her hips as she stepped over to the window.

The orange hue of the sunrise slowly seeped in through the gap of the thick, heavy curtains and streaked a line of golden light against Cerys’ face. She peeked outside, the sun igniting her blonde hair like a halo, every stray flyway catching light. 

River chewed the inside of his cheek, his anger and bitterness subsiding for only a moment as a sweet tenderness squeezed itself around his heart. He missed his sister, even in all his resentment and uneasiness of her past actions.

“But,” he continued. Seeing Cerys in the sunlight reminded him of when she had first returned and the hours spent reminiscing under a canopy of trees, the summer’s sun filtering through the leaves over them. “I told you how good I was, how happy...”

“I couldn’t take you away from the life you had,” she admitted and turned back to River, arms folded under her chest.

“But now you will?” He asked.

Cerys shrugged. “They found you, Rivs. I need to hide you again, some place safe and secure, and I can’t risk leaving you alone right now.”

River nodded, turning to his mother who remained sound asleep and undisturbed. He wondered if Cerys had magically silenced them but his irritation no longer grew worse.

“I moved out,” he confessed but did not look back at Cerys. “That’s why we couldn’t go to my grandparents’ house. It’s not home, it’s never been.”

“Did they hurt you?”

“No, not… Not physically,” he exhaled and shook his head. “Look, they were just self-centred assholes. We never got along and if we weren’t fighting, they straight up ignored me, so the moment I could, I left and never looked back.”

“You never told…” Cerys stopped herself and sighed, leaving the window to approach River instead. He turned to her when she stopped short of him. “When did you leave?”

“Three years ago,” he replied, and Cerys cursed under her breath. “Is that a problem?”

“I created those wards to keep harm out, but also to hide you,” she explained and reached out to hold the red stone hanging from his neck. “Your amulet is woven with my magic to link you to mine…” From inside her shirt, she pulled out her own pendant, the jewel smaller but with the same red hue as River’s, caged in gold wire. “This is how I know when you need me. However, I made sure to weave the magic from the wards of your house, your grandparents’ house to cloak you. As long as you're in the proximity of your amulet, you’d be hidden.”

“But?” River questioned.

“But it’s a small vessel for magic and it depletes, so you’d need to cross your threshold every now and then to basically recharge it. Understand?”

“And I moved out, haven’t been back and it ran out of juice?” River smiled bitterly, a small chuckle escaping him. “I’m twenty-one, Cerys. I was going to move out eventually, you had to have known that. This is on you.”

“Time escaped me,” she frowned and then smiled sadly at her brother. “You’ve grown so much, so quickly.”

Her words cut through River, his eyes stinging with the threat of tears. He turned away from her and blinked away the urge, not wanting to give in to his desire to cry like a child in need of comfort from his big sister.

Cerys stepped back towards the window, her gaze returning outside. “Where do you live now? You can stay here and I’ll go ward your new place. Maybe we can set up there for a while, buy me some time to figure out what to do next.”

She pulled open the curtains and when River didn’t respond, she glanced back. He met her with a grimace and shrugged helplessly.

“River?”

“I kind of don’t live anywhere,” he admitted. “I don’t make enough to afford rent here and I’ve couch surfed too many places too many times to be welcomed back.”

“So where do you stay?”

“Shelters sometimes, or I come here when visiting hours are open and sleep in the chair, use Mum’s bathroom. I think some staff here know but none have said anything. Or if it’s night time, park benches or I… I make friends, stay overnight, leave before they wake up.”

River didn’t like how Cerys looked at him, shock and pity mixed in her expression. It made his stomach drop and an awkwardness settle between them.

“I… I didn’t…” Cerys raked her hands through her hair, a breath shuddering out of her. “I never thought you were having it this bad.”

The sour taste of his resentment returned to his mouth. He glanced away and gritted his teeth. “How could you? You never came back.”

“River, I’m so sorry—”

A loud gasp tore their attention from each other and Rhea shot up in bed, wide eyes staring straight through them. River tripped in his rush to her side, while Cerys' magic spread like a thick cloak of protection as she searched for any assailants, outside and in.

Awoken from her catatonia, with a voice loud and clear, Rhea spoke.

“No moon above the night,

Lives lost without a fight.

In a spiral of power, blood paints the Earth,

The centre a conduit, a place for rebirth.

Do not linger, it is not safe. 

Do not run, you’ll not escape. 

Retreat, quickly, to her embrace, 

Where tears break and fate awaits.”