Snakes are described as one of the most vile creatures on the planet by people around the world by telling stories and folklore on how they are associated with cruelty and revenge, but personally, I think they need to add the part on how unbelievably annoying snakes are. To think there are snake owners out there in the world is bewildering to me because who in the world would want to own one of those devil worms. But sadly, I somewhat do have one thing in common with them.

While snake owners are attached to their pets in lovely and caring ways, I, on the other hand, am physically attached to one. In simple terms, I have a literal snake growing out of my lower body. No, this is not a joke in any possible way so don’t think I'm lying here or trying to be funny. In fact, I will give you a proper explanation of myself and my story. 

My name is Abraham Steven Finley and I am eighteen years old. I was told by my mother that I was born with a special gift unlike other children. But in reality, I was born with a terrible curse that started the downfall of my life. Ever since I was born, I have brought darkness everywhere I go, for having this demon from the waist down; a King Cobra with a menace personally. 

When I was around twelve years old, my mother tried to explain to me how she wasn’t too happy to see the little snake wrapped around her child after being born but later learned to accept the harsh reality of things in life. Realistically if I were her, I would just throw myself into an adoption center and dip when given the chance to escape raising a literal monster, but that's life I guess.

Yes, you can already guess my childhood wasn’t good either, but that is because I am always getting into trouble or causing a mess no matter where I'm at; since I am attached to a mad snake. Being homeschooled was bad enough too, with having a large reptile sliding through my room wrecking my personal items and always tearing down anything in sight until it gets what it wants.  

Despite all the negativity that comes from me, my mother still tries her hardest and gives me advice on how to deal with my snake problem, just so I could have a somewhat normal life. I can certainly say she has been giving even more tips since we just moved down south of the country to Mississippi after she got a new job as a nurse. What makes this situation so grim? Well, I actually have to go to a real school again with real classmates instead of being homeschooled like in the past. But it's not that homeschooling is any better anyway, but still.

Imagine me walking down the school hallways and some guy mistakenly bumps into me. If that snake feels threatened or angry in any way, that guy is going to say goodbye to one of his testicles. So it really isn’t going to be a fun experience for my first day at high school. March 13, 2024, was the day to test my theory and to see whether my fears would come to light. 

During the morning, I slept peacefully in bed, safe and sound, without any worries. The sun rained arrows of warmth through the window, giving me more relaxation for my soul. But peace wouldn’t last long as I felt some part of my body moving slightly off the bed before immediately falling onto the floor.

   Thump! “Ouch! Can’t I have some peaceful sleep for a little while? You’ve gotta be kidding me?” I said irritated at seeing my slithering enemy sliding all over the room floor, as it climbed onto my bookshelf, seemingly in a fit of rage. It was seemingly bigger and longer than its usual twelve-inch size range and was staring back at me with its golden predator eyes. I looked around the room and saw dried-up scales on the floor. Ones that only could have come from the bloody monster.

“I'm not even at the school yet and you're already acting out of control,” I rolled my eyes and grabbed the lower half of the snake's black colored body. “So just come down from there and stop acting like you have the IQ of a homeless man on crack.” 

Hissssssss! The snake responded back by opening its mouth showing two dominant white fangs, seemingly giving off its threatening signal towards me. It really needs to know who’s in charge here and stop acting nuts.

I quickly ignored its warning and yanked it onto the floor. The floorboard rumbled with heavy force between me and the snake struggling for dominance over one other. Smooth dry skin wrapped around my right arm and neck for almost an instant, trying to hold me off from retracting air into my lunges. While forcefully holding my breath, I felt a sting of pain with small amounts of blood leaving my body, as snake fangs appeared deep in my left arm. “Ouch! You little-” I coughed trying to regain my breath as it held onto me. 

Thump! Bap! Crunch! I repeatedly ran and rammed into random objects in my room; dresser, computer setup, bed, mirror, chair, lamp, and anything else that could have helped release me from its dry grasp. Right as I pushed on with pain coursing through my body at that moment, so did that blasted brain-dead noodle worm, as it narrowed its mad expression into a more furious one than earlier. 

Before either one of us could make another move, a soft knock was heard at the door. 

“Abraham honey, I hear a lot of noise coming from your room,” said my mother at the other end of the door, seemingly a little frustrated. “You aren’t messing around in there?” “Yeah, just getting up this morning, that's all” “Alright then, just make sure to eat your breakfast at the dinner table.” 

After hearing the word “breakfast” and seeing my mother's shadow disappearing from under the door, I felt my stomach rumbling in response to knowing food was nearby, while the rest of my body regained its strength from being bitten. The snake slowly retracts its fangs from out of my arm, I could see a wicked look in its eyes. I could tell it was sensing the same hunger coursing through me, from us being linked together. A red forked tongue flicked out of its mouth in a famish behavior and the rest of its scaly body came off of me as it rushed towards the door. 

“Man, can’t you just think for once and let me get dressed first,” I quickly facepalm myself and use all the strength I had to hold the snake back from dragging me with it out the door. Sweat dripped down my forehead and palms, while I was slowly losing grip over the scaly beast. The feeling of being hungry and holding off a large slithering monster was making my hands weaker by the second. 

“You know, you could just eat breakfast later and let me put on some clothes first and stop being a dumb- ” Hisssss! My words were quickly cut off as my arms had reached their limits and drawn back with the snake's anger reaching its own limit. 

Falling out of my bed wasn’t too bad and fighting a mad snake was probably the worst way to start out the day. But nothing could prepare me for what was going to happen next. 

The snake's eyes grew more predator-like with its sharp eyes almost glowing red with rage. Before I could do anything else, the snake wrapped itself around my legs into a knot and tripped me onto the ground. I struggled and tried unwrapping myself, but it was too late. I peeked over to see the snake rushing out the door. 

Imagine playing tug of war with your lovable dog at a park, but they decide to take it to the extreme and drag you across the park slamming into everything in sight. Well, that is what I am going through right now.  

Sounds of furniture tipping over echo throughout our hallway in combination with my screams of terror from slamming into each corner of the wall. While being dragged in pain, I could see a small smirk appear on the snake's face, seemingly enjoying tossing me around like a flightless kite. Reminder to self: Make sure to beat the living hell out of that snake that’s as long as Drake. 

When entering the kitchen, the snake grip over my legs disappears in an instant, sending me sliding across the floor and finally crashing into the dinner table. I rubbed my head to try to clear myself from the pain that felt like being used in a pinball machine and saw my mother sitting down at the table, giving me a disapproving look as she was eating breakfast herself. 

“What is with you making all that noise this early in the morning,” my mother said and frowned. “I thought you said you were up and ready for school yet you're barely dressed.” 

“I was getting dressed, but this monster woke me and dragged me through the house.”

“That doesn’t excuse you from getting yourself ready for school,” “You still had enough time to at least put a shirt on unless you want to walk around looking any kind of way.”

As my mother started to get more frustrated and ranting at me, I immediately spaced out into my mind, where boredom is non-existent and freedom is infinite in my domain. Swimming in different types of food with incredible tastes: roasted chicken, corn on the cob, beef patties freshly grilled, ice cream, and a chocolate fountain. The number of things I would do for a meal like that right now would have me on the F.B.I. top wanted list. 

“Abraham! Are you even listening to a single word I am saying right now?” My mother snapped me back to reality and seemed more furious than before. 

“I was listening.” “Okay then, tell me what I said then- and also tell me where my breakfast went!” My mother snapped as her plate was now empty, leaving behind a trail of crumbs along the table and onto the floor. My eyes followed the crumbs carefully and saw the trail ended with the snake eating a half-eaten sandwich. 

With the snake shrinking in size and sliding back into my pants, both our hunger was satisfied for the time being. My mother sighed heavily and got up from the table. I could feel her radiating her frustration as if it was coming off her body, with her taking small sighs in between calming down. 

“I didn’t do anything. I was trying to get dressed. None of this is my fault!”

“Don’t want to hear your excuses this early in the morning and you can have the other plate on the table if you want. I don’t have much time to talk when I have to get to work. Just keep yourself under control when going to school and don’t miss that bus when you're done with everything else this morning.”

“That devil isn’t me! If anything, I am just as upset as you are about this.”

As I tried to explain to my mother the reason for the troubles that just took place, she only ignored my words and walked off to get ready for the day. 

Now it really wasn’t my fault at all and she knows it. I was trying to sleep peacefully and would have woken up on time without being dragged by a worm-slithering menace. It's the full truth with no lies attached. 

She acts like I can control whatever the demon does with my mind as if I want to cobble up her food without question. News Flash; I can’t do that even if I wanted to. If I could make that snake follow a simple basic command, my life would be ten times better than what it is now. The only simple task I have gotten the snake to do is to leave me alone every now and then, but even that was only if I had food on me. But it is a good thing, my hunger is gone for now, along with that snake since I can actually get myself ready for the day. 

I sat down at the table and smelled the aromatic scent of food coming from my plate. Without dealing with any annoyance of that reptile demon saint, I happily grabbed a fork and knife and was ready for a delicious meal to flow into my taste buds. Right before the swift motion of my hand went into my plate, I had a thought. A thought of action and cleverness.

Plan of action that could save me some trouble later with that unbearable limbless lizard.

Putting breakfast away for the time being will probably be a good thing for me in the long run, for any future snake problem. For some people, eating breakfast is something they wouldn’t want to miss, but luckily for me, I already had breakfast in a way so I don’t feel too bad about missing it. Even if I didn't entirely eat it myself. 

After wrapping my breakfast with some tin foil I found in the counter drawers, my eyes took notice of a blue-light blur almost outside of my vision, to the window. I took a closer look towards the window, moving the blinds out of the way to only see my mother already getting into her car. She really wasn’t joking about not being able to stay long. 

But I have plenty of time on my hands before the bus rolls in so I can relax and get myself prepared for the day.   

Seeing the wreckage of furniture laid out across the hallway and living room from the early events of that green monster had me thinking for a while as I cleaned up. If that snake had acted this over being a little hungry, who knows what terrors it would have committed if I was sitting starving in school one day. It would have popped out of my pants like a jack in the box, biting anything or anyone it sees in its eyesight. A nightmare I couldn’t let happen, yet the feeling of odds of it occurring were high due to the snake's untamed behavior. 

After finishing up with sweeping up the floor and putting up the rest of the furniture back in place, I walked back into my room, to actually put on some clothes and not worry about a snake trying to rip off my face. Clothes and other personal items were still scattered across the floor being torn apart with tiny pieces of material barely being attached to it. Yet, not all my clothes were turned into chew toys, saving me the trouble of looking like I was beaten up in an alleyway. 

The bottom of my dresser, opened up from the reach of my hand, revealing the rows of neatly placed clothes having no sights of dirtiness or torn fabric. The snake had no clue of a hidden drawer on the side of the dresser and it reminded me that I am still smarter than its pebble-sized brain. I picked out a long-sleeved yellow hoodie with some nice brown leather pants that really stood out to me with a unique style. Also couldn’t forget the boots I had in my closet. Luckily, my shoes were safe behind the floorboard from underneath so the snake had no clue of their location as well. Most of my everyday items were hidden around my room during the day, but I couldn’t say the same for my other items that had already met their fates. 

With my snake problem actually being put away for the moment, I grabbed a bottle of hairspray and comb to set my decency to perfection. My day was set in motion and with me having some extra time, I could possibly get some time to myself. That rarely happens around here. Honk! Honk! Time really isn’t on my side today, isn't it?