Chapter 17 - The Empty Room

Syra looked around her room for a sign of Icar, but found the room empty. Her bed was perfectly made and cold. She began closing her windows, but left her large window open a crack before she sat in her favorite chair. When she sat down, she remembered her vision and felt guilty about not pursuing this matter. She grabbed her journal to begin trying to figure out what she knew of her vision.

I know someone was dead. It was a ground burial, so not an aquatic person. I also saw Pythia, Lia, and Sorel. So this was likely an event involving someone of our queendom. Since Pythia was about to speak at the funeral, this would be someone of importance. So it must be a member of our family, but who isn’t aquatic.

A sudden knock had Syra slam her journal shut and hide it behind her before answering.

“Come in.”

“Hello again, your Highness.” A rumbling voice that was definitely not Hestia spoke as Syra heard the door close.

Syra jumped up and saw Eclipse standing near the doorway looking around her room. She was surprised at his expression when he looked back at her. He quickly crossed the space between them and leaned towards her. She felt his breath tickle her ear as she shivered from the sensation.

She heard him sniff deeply and then felt a small billow of smoke tickle her cheek before stinging her eyes. She turned to wipe her eyes and felt his hand graze her neck as he moved her hair aside. Syra gasped and grabbed her neck before turning back. Smoke billowed from his nostrils as his eyes glowed purple and his face grew furious.

“I thought you had worn purple today to match my eyes. Was I wrong, Syra?” She had never seen him angry even when fighting with Aurelian.

“I had worn purple to match your eyes. It was to make Aurelian angry, but I did not know you would be there.” Syra responded as she backed up a step.

Why is he so angry? Is it because I was using him to make his cousin angry? Why did he come back, he just left?

“I spent the tea party thinking I could faintly smell a harpy, but thought… No… maybe I was hoping it was one of the Duchesses that had a secret lover.” He stepped back and sighed while rubbing his face.

 “Was I wrong in thinking there was a spark of feelings between us?” He looked back up at her with another new expression, he looked hurt as he looked into her eyes.

“A-a harpy? A secret lover? Why would you think that?” Syra felt her stomach drop and felt a pang of guilt at how hurt he looked.

“Do sirens not have a strong sense of smell? I could smell through your scented soap the smell of a harpy. It wasn’t strong enough in that room to be sure who it was coming from until I helped you up from your chair.” Eclipse began to slowly walk towards her, with his gaze never leaving Syra who was glued to the spot.

Is that why he suddenly stiffened his posture? Dragons can smell Icar even after I have taken a bath? Does Aurelian know? Why is Eclipse so upset? Does he actually have feelings for me?

“I could smell it even stronger the moment I opened your door. Did you think that opening your windows would get rid of the scent? That the sea air would clear the smell of your lover from your room?” He stepped closer to her and she looked up at his face, “Your lover was so careless.”

Syra was flustered and confused what that meant until Eclipse leaned forward and pulled her hair back. She felt his fingers stroke her neck and felt a slight pain where the marks were. She blushed and slammed her hand against her neck.

“So was I wrong? Tell me that I am and I will leave your castle if you ask. I will give up my feelings for you. What do you want from me?” His eyes searched hers as he waited for a response.

“I-I don’t know how I feel about you. Everything has been so much… I don’t know how I feel about anything! Everyone expects me to be a perfect prophetic princess, but then everyone tells me constantly how I keep making mistakes! Nothing I do is right and I am exhausted of trying to live up everyone else’s expectations of me! Especially when no one even listens to my prophecies when I try to tell them!” Syra’s face was hot and she wasn’t sure if the tears she felt were from anger or grief.

Why can’t I do anything right? I am so tired of having to be perfect and never being good enough.

Syra crumpled to the ground as she sobbed. She hadn’t meant to break in front of anyone, but she couldn’t stop the sobs that racked her body despite trying desperately. Syra felt a hand on her back. She looked up into the gentle eyes of Eclipse. 

He wrapped his arms around her and let her sob into his chest. They stayed on the floor for some time before Syra heard Eclipse’s voice break the quiet sound of sniffling.

“Syra… It seems you have been dealing with so much. I-I did not want to cause you pain and distress. I will listen to you, about anything. I promise to always listen.” Eclipse’s eyes looked worried as he pulled her tighter to his chest.

“I keep hearing how I do not act as a princess should because I am not talking to the nobles that spread rumors about me or letting Aurelian mistreat me in order to keep a future engagement no one even cares if I want. Pythia has always made her hatred of me clear and she and my brother keep tattling to my mother to keep me constantly in trouble.” Syra sighed into his warm chest.

“Why do they behave like that? Correct me if I am mistaken, but aren’t they both a couple decades older than you?” His rumbling voice made his chest vibrate as he spoke.

“For Pythia? She has made her disdain for me clear since I was born. For Robert, he would do anything to win our mother’s favor since he feels being human makes him less than his sisters. My mother never listens to me. I think she would prefer a perfectly silent doll over me. She won’t even listen to my latest vision which someone’s life could depend on!” Syra nuzzled her face into his chest and took a deep breath of his scent. He smelled smokey, but also like she was walking through a sunny forest.

“Why would she not listen to your vision?” Eclipse’s hand began to slowly stroke her back in a comforting pattern.

“She thinks I am lying to get out of my room. So now I have to try to figure out what was happening in my vision on my own.” Syra felt herself relax into his arms.

“Are visions not clear? Why wouldn’t Duchess Sorel or Duchess Ophelia be able to help so you aren’t alone in this?” Eclipse continued to comfort her as he looked down in worry at her.

“Visions are basically us seeing a bit of the future. Usually from our own perspective and it is a random piece of the future. Without any context it is often hard to figure out what is happening. Like a vision of someone you have yet to meet or a place you have yet to go.”

“Visions are not always some big important event like many assume, often it is just a random part of a random day. This vision was different.”  Syra buried her face again and felt him hug her tightly to him which gave her the strength to continue talking.

“This vision was about death. I am trying to figure out what was happening based on what I saw, but I cannot ask Sorel or Lia for help. It is dangerous to tell a vision to someone else as it can make the vision come true from their actions. I wanted advice from my mother, but it is clear that I am on my own.” Syra rubbed her arm, but looked up when she felt a finger lift her chin.

“You are not alone. I told you before that I would be on your side no matter what. I am serious about that.” He gently cupped her face, but she pushed his hand away and leaned away from him.

“You more recently told me you would leave the castle.” She saw his face look slightly hurt and felt a pang of guilt for lashing out at him.

“Only if you asked me to. I would not abandon you out of hurt feelings or spite. I am unable to stop how I feel about you, even if it hurts me.” He let his arms fall to his side and looked down at the hand that had been holding her face a moment before.

“I am just so tired of everyone being angry with me for not acting the way they want me to. Even if I do as everyone asks, no one is satisfied. What is the point of trying to be perfect when I will eventually  mess everything up or someone will claim I did.” Syra rose to her feet and reached a hand out to Eclipse, “I am truly sorry for yelling at you. That wasn’t fair.” Eclipse took her hand, but rose without placing weight on her hand.

“I am sorry for barging in and saying what I did. I guess I am not stronger than my dragon instincts afterall. Do you feel… better after talking?” He took her hand and kissed it before looking up with just his eyes.

“I…” Syra paused and realized she felt lighter than she had in a long time, “I do, actually. Thank you, Eclipse. I didn’t realize how actually being heard would feel.” Syra felt a surge of rage she didn’t understand try to rise before she shoved it back down.

“Can I ask you a selfish question?” Eclipse looked away as he sat down on the couch.

“After all that? Yes.” Syra sat in her favorite chair nearby.

“Did you take a harpy as your lover to try to end your engagement with Aurelian? If you had asked I would have found you a way out. I would have given you options of escape.” He looked up at her with those beautiful sad eyes of his as Syra felt herself blush.

“I didn’t think about the consequences honestly, I just wanted comfort. Warmth.” Syra reached towards Eclipse wanting to comfort him, but faltering as she did not know how.

“Why can’t I be the person to comfort you?” Syra blinked at his question as she tried to process what he said.

Surely he didn’t mean… But what if he did? If I assume he did and he didn’t mean in that way then that would make matters worse. He surely didn’t mean to comfort me that way….

“You do! I just… am a disaster. I am just stuck playing a role and I don’t even know what I want.” She chuckled in a humorless way, “Or even who I am as a person instead of the role I was born to play.” Syra felt a storm of emotions, but she fought to keep from breaking down again in front of Duke Eclipse.

“You have never had room to grow into who you are. Maybe you need time to be rebellious and try new things so you can find yourself.” His mouth curved into a half smile with a shine of mischief in his eyes.

“I am not setting fire to any more of the castle or letting you do so.” Syra’s tone was scolding, but she found herself smiling at him.

“I rebel the way I want to from my role. You find your way to rebel. I won’t tell you how to rebel if you don’t tell me how.” His deep chuckle made a slight shiver run down her spine.

“You won’t tell me how to rebel even if I choose to take lovers?” She leaned in and felt his breath as he slowly exhaled.

“You make this difficult for me when you come that close, Syra.” Eclipse looked at her lips that were inches away.