A day went by. Two days went by. Three days went by. Nothing. Not one mention of vacation. It was making me antsy and that led to an unpleasant thought popping into my head. What if I couldn’t go with him and that’s why he hadn’t brought it up yet? Or maybe he’d changed his mind about me meeting his family.

No. No, no, no, Zedikai. No more jumping to conclusions and driving yourself crazy. You’ve graduated from that and now you’re looking to be in a serious relationship with an amazing man who’s great at communication once he gets his words together. He’ll tell me when he’s ready.

But I was impatient. I kept waiting for him to bring it up but he wouldn’t even say anything. I started to wonder if it had anything to do with the odd place we were still in. I still didn’t know what to call our relationship. I’d wanted to go slow before because I didn’t know how to be a boyfriend but I wouldn’t ever learn at this rate.

One afternoon after lunch, I pulled him away from the others. We entered the stairwell we first went to when he’d told me he liked seeing me in uniform.

“We cannot make this a habit,” Aubyn said, a teasing smile gracing his handsome face.

“As tempting as that sounds, you’re right.” I wouldn’t want to get caught at work of all places. “I need to talk to you about something important though.”

He immediately looked concerned. “What is it? Are you okay? Is it about work?”

“No, no. I know this isn’t the right place to discuss this but… you know I like you right? In case you have doubts or think my feelings have changed, I still like you. A lot.”

“I know.” He cupped my cheeks and kissed my forehead. “I know you do.”

How bittersweet. We liked each other, yet we were still in an odd place. I really hated to ruin the moment, but I was growing more confused every day. If Aubyn wasn’t going to come forth about what was delaying our relationship, I needed to pry it out of him. I also needed to ask him about our trip.

“If you like me, then don’t keep making me wait for… whatever it is that you’re thinking about all by yourself. I can tell since you haven’t been talking to me.”

Aubyn fell silent.

“Remember what happened with Coen? When you kept quiet because you didn’t know how I’d react?” I held his hands. “I like you. There is nothing you can ever tell me that will change that. But you’re giving me time to overthink and I hate that because you know how dreadful my imagination can get.”

“Please do not overthink this.”

“I can’t help it when you won’t talk to me. I thought we’d be in your hometown by now, calling you my boyfriend and meeting your family. But we’re not. Why?”

“Two days.”

“We leave in two days?”

“No. Give me two more days before I give you an answer. I will explain everything then. If I do not give you an acceptable answer in two days, feel free to lay on a most creative punishment.” Aubyn took his phone out of his pocket to look at the time. “I have to go. I have a case to close. I would like you to do some shopping when you’re off work. Think of warm weather clothes. I have a meeting this evening, but text me when you are home.”

I sighed heavily. The shopping part sounded promising at least. “Kiss me.” He didn’t hesitate to comply, but it felt sad. “I’ll text you when I’m done with work.”

I left work to go see Milan.  I was still bad at shopping for myself and if anyone knew where to get warm-weather clothing, it would be Milan.

“Shopping? Yes! Absolutely.” He turned around to look back at his coworker and said something quickly in Alunai. She nodded and he set off out of the shop, pulling me behind him excitedly. “What are you planning to get? Or are you just looking to burn through money?” he asked as we started walking down the street.

“People go shopping just to burn through money?” I asked, looking into the open doors of the stores we passed. Some had clothes displayed in the windows.

“Retail therapy is a real thing you know. Treating yourself usually makes you feel good.”

“Let me guess. You’ve done it once or twice?”

“I’m spoiled. Sang buys me everything I want. He rarely tells me no.”

I rolled my eyes. He really was special. “I’m looking for warm weather clothes.”

“Oh, yeah. You need it for your trip.”

“Have you ever been to Tsuk’ki?”

“Nope. Humans aren’t allowed there at all. Karys may have situations that permit humans to be here, but Tsuk’ki is way more strict. I think aside from family, no other people are allowed there. Aubyn must have pulled some major strings to get you approved to visit.”

“If that’s the case, how do you even know this?”

“I asked Nao, duh. Sang and I travel at least three times per year and sometimes out of the country. I needed to know which countries I could travel to.”

Makes sense. “Do you know if Tsuk’ki has a bad past with humans too?”

Milan shrugged. “Not a clue but highly probable.”

I had a lot to learn, but I’d put that on the back burner for now. Aubyn said to shop for warm-weather clothes and so that was what I did for the next hour. Even though I didn’t think a place like Karys would have anything suited to warmer weather, there were plenty of options. I didn’t buy much because I only had two hands to carry it all back to the dorm but I hoped it would be enough.

I texted Aubyn as soon as I got home with Milan that evening. He insisted I try on all the clothes we bought but I stopped at each clothing category. I didn’t have the patience or enough interest in putting on a fashion show for him.

We hung out for a few hours. He busied himself while I took my language class, accompanied me grocery shopping and cooked for us in my dorm while I took notes. However, he promptly ditched me once evening came because he had to prepare dinner for Sang before he got home.

“What are you? A househusband?”

“If I didn’t like working so much, I would be,” he replied, putting his shoes on to leave. “Later.”

“Later!” I called just before I heard the click of the door closing behind him.

I wasn’t in the mood to figure out my drawing pad so I didn’t have anything to do but wait for Aubyn to get home. I took one of my snacks and went up to his dorm to wait for him. His room felt more comfortable than mine. Maybe it was because his scent and his belongings were everywhere whereas my room simply had my minuscule items here and there.

It took a little over an hour but the beeping of the door being unlocked made me sit right up in bed. Aubyn was home and he was very surprised to see me sitting on his bed waiting for him.

“This is a nice surprise. I now know why you did not answer your door but that does not explain why you were not picking up your phone.”

He didn’t look pleased. I patted myself down only to find nothing. “I must have left my phone back at my place. Sorry.”

Aubyn approached me and looked at me sadly. “Will you sleep here tonight? Or would you prefer we sleep together in your room?”

“Either place is fine. Is something wrong?”

“No, not really. Will you wait for me?”

I nodded and watched him move around his room as he undressed. “Milan cooked. Are you hungry? You can have some of the leftovers.”

“That would be nice. Thank you.”

I got up and left his dorm. There were food containers I hadn’t put to much use since buying them. I heated and packed up Aubyn’s dinner well, feeling oddly domestic. It must be how Milan felt since he would proudly state that he was in charge of the house and the cooking for Sang. It kind of made me… happy. There was a fluttery feeling in my stomach as I made my way back down to his room.

Minutes later, Aubyn was sitting at the table enjoying his dinner and I was enjoying my snack. I’d been snacking a lot lately. Hopefully, it would lead to some well-needed weight gain. Aubyn didn’t speak until we had eaten, cleaned up, and were back sitting at the table. He was freaking me out. The silence was too loud.

“Speak, please. You’re scaring me,” I told him honestly. “Is it bad news?”

“You can decide that once you hear it.” Aubyn took a deep breath and leaned his elbows on the table. “I apologize for the silence. I needed to sort some things out and I wanted to have this talk with you when I’d have most – if not all – the answers to the questions I know you will have. First, let us discuss our possible trip to Tsuk’ki.”

I quickly covered my ears and squeezed my eyes shut before I could understand what I was doing. He was being too serious. I didn’t want to hear it. “If it’s bad news, I don’t want to hear it.”

“Zedikai…” Aubyn gently pried my hands away from my ears. “Please listen to me.”

I dropped my hands on the table with a loud thud. “I can’t go with you, can I?”

“Listen,” he repeated more sternly. When I relaxed, he let me go. “What I want is for you to join me in visiting my family. I am not sure how long it will be. However, humans are not allowed to enter Tsuk’ki which meant I needed to ask for permission to allow you to come with me.”

“Is it because of-”

“Listen first. Some of your questions may be answered as I speak.” I nodded. “Tsuk’ki is an island divided into five territories with ten districts within those territories. These districts are ruled by chiefs and those chiefs form a council. That makes five councils in total for the central, northern, western, eastern and southern regions of Tsuk’ki. Whenever a decision needs to be made regarding the country, a council meeting with the heads of each council is held to decide what actions need to be taken. A human being allowed into the country requires the council to meet. Since you are just one person and I am legally your guardian here in Karys, they have agreed to allow you into Tsuk’ki.”

“Why do I sense a ‘but’ coming?”

“Because their agreement comes with conditions.”

“What kind of conditions?”

“I am not aware of all the details and will not be until we get there if you still want to go. I will also be responsible for you while we are there but you will be granted far less freedom than you have now in Karys. You have to learn about and participate in Tsuk’kian culture and play by our rules. I was also told not to let you wander too far from the house on your own. You have to blend in as much as possible or they will expel you and I will not be able to bring you back into the country.”

I had planned on experiencing his culture as much as I was able to. He’d hardly spoken about his country so I had been waiting to see everything for myself. Of course, I’d do as the Romans in Rome. It was only polite but I couldn’t quite shake the feeling of the chiefs having these conditions to put their own kind of leash on me as Karys had with the guardian system.

“These conditions are very stern and may seem unfair, so if you would rather not go there, I understand. I would still have to go for a little while, but we can keep in touch every day. Sang has agreed to take you with him on his vacation back to his home town if you decide to stay in Karys.”

“I’m going.”

“Do not feel as if you have to.”

“I do have to.”

“Zedikai…”

“I’m sorry, did you not hear me say I like you? I’ll play by their rules and do anything else they want me to do if I get to stay with you.”

“Think about it.”

“Just like my decision to follow you here, it’s already decided. I’m a clingy little shit. You can’t get rid of me. Tsuk’ki…” My fingertips had gone cold. “Tsuk’ki has a bad past with humans too it seems. Do people there hate humans?”

“I cannot speak for everyone, but from what I can tell, there are people who feel safer with the ban in place because of history. As for hate… I have never heard anyone express that they hate humans.”

“Why are humans disliked though? Milan told me that humans used to be able to live in Karys, but now they are only allowed under watch. Now, you’re telling me that I’ll be on house arrest in Tsuk’ki. I thought Karys was safe for me, that Tsuk’ki was safe for me. But now I find out I’m part of a highly disliked species on this planet. I should at least know why.”