"Why is everyone laughing?" Ashkii asked, trying to make sense of the rowdy commotion around the pool table. It was late on Sunday at Giovanni's bar. The place was flooded in dim lights and echoed country music from the jukebox tucked away in the corner.

     "Because that dude just made a terrible bet," Giovanni said, answering Ashkii's question. The younger man was sitting at the bar and watching the pool contest from a distance. Giovanni would pause to explain things here and there, but sometimes he would get distracted and he wouldn't remember where he was going with it. Usually, what happened when he'd sip a shot here and there through the night.

     "Well, I guess he's going to have to fork up a lot of money today," Ashkii said in a slightly slurred voice as he made eye contact with Giovanni. The corners of the older man's lips twisted into a smile, then a small giggle escaped his slips.

     "Jesus my head hurts," he said, wincing as he looked away from Ashkii briefly. "I shouldn't have drunk so much, huh?"

     "I'm a bit out of it too..." Ashkii muttered, making Giovanni roll his eyes.

     "Well, a glass or two seems to be enough to throw you off," the older man said, making Ashkii nod before laughing a bit.

     "You're not wrong."

     The two seemed to be having an easy conversation, regardless of what happened the last time they'd been in the same room together. Ashkii was happy. He'd been a little nervous walking through the bar's doors and making eye contact with Giovanni, but the man had simply smiled when he'd walked in and offered him a drink before going on to explain what happened yesterday with the game, and what was going on currently. The bartender never brought up that morning and Ashkii's place, and Ashkii took it as a sign that he was willing to brush that under the rug for the time being. So, he did the same, and he was enjoying the night.

     The bartender was bubbly and sweet, and it was a sharp contrast to how he had been when he had found out what Ashkii was watching.

     Everything was going so well that Ashkii thought that he shouldn't bring up his feelings or admit what he wanted to do with Giovanni. He felt those could wait—at least for now that Giovanni seemed to be in a good and friendly mood. He'd missed coming to the bar, and just chatting. And now, there was an extra layer of getting to look at the person he was madly attracted to up close. Ashkii avoided looking at Giovanni's mouth, but he noticed the dip dimples showing up anytime the man would laugh, and he noticed the man frequently reaching out to brush back his hair with his fingers with very little success.

     Giovanni's hair was a bit wilder today. It seemed like he hadn't styled it, but instead of looking unkempt and messy, the dark curls, pulling up in all corners made him look a bit younger—sweeter—cuter.

     "Is there a problem?"

     Giovanni's question made Ashkii blink before realizing that he'd been staring at the man a little bit too intently. Ashkii's lips parted as his face warmed up and his lips trembled.

     "N-nothing." He managed to get out, looking away from Giovanni before taking a hold of the glass in front of him and taking a swing. He winched a bit, not even liking the taste of the drink.

     "Don't do that, or you won't be able to drive," Giovanni said in a concerned tone, reaching out to hold onto Ashkii's shoulder. "Are you okay?" the older man asked, inspecting Ashkii's expression. It was a mix of confusion, embarrassment, and guilt. Giovanni's stare made the younger man fidget in his seat.

     Ashkii nodded his head. "I'm fine."

     Giovanni frowned a bit, giving the younger man a stern look before moving his hand to the man's face. The man's cold palm almost made Ashkii jump out from his seat, but instead, he let out a little sign, letting his eyes follow the fingers that were now tracing his jaw as his heartbeat increased.

     "I'm not sure you can head off by yourself tonight..." Giovanni murmured, seemingly unaware of the effect he was having on the younger man. "You're out of it. You shouldn't have taken that last shot."

     Ashkii pulled his face away from Giovanni's hands, forcing himself to look away. "I'm fine." He insisted, narrowing his eyes at the door. "I'll just leave after I sober up a bit."

     Giovanni scuffed. "That's not how alcohol works," he said. "It'll get worse, especially after that shot and you probably can't drive until tomorrow."

     "I can try."

     "Yeah, you can do that and possibly die," Giovanni said. "The roads are a bit slippery. You can sleep in my spare room tonight and get up early so you can catch your class tomorrow."

     "I—I don't know..." Ashkii trailed. He had planned to talk to Giovanni about how he felt today, but they'd been having such a good time he'd pushed things back, and now Giovanni was telling him to spend the night at his place. At first, when they'd started talking this was something he'd done all the time without a second thought, but after that Monday... he wasn't sure what to do or think. He saw Giovanni differently and Giovanni knew that. It would be painfully awkward sleeping in a room adjacent to him and looking at the man in his bed head and PJs the next morning. He could barely get the image of Giovanni's lean legs out of his head from when he had visited last week. Ashkii wasn't sure he could handle all that awkwardness, and he couldn't promise himself he wouldn't say or do anything stupid because of all the alcohol. Aside from all the sleeping, he tended to talk a lot more and babbled things he wouldn't dream of when drunk.

"I hope you're not letting what happened to make you say no?"

Giovanni's question took Ashkii by surprise. He looked up, giving the man a long stare before blinking and looking back down at the bar counter's surface. He had briefly thought about denying it, but what would be the point? Giovanni could read him like an open book.

Ashkii heard the bartender sigh from the other end. "I don't know about you, but I really want us not to think too much about what happened. I'm sorry for making such a big deal about it—"

"Aren't you uncomfortable?" Ashkii asked, cutting the older man off. He looked up to be met with the man's brown eyes that were narrowing themselves at him. They seemed confused and waited in anticipation for him to finish his sentence.

"Uncomfortable with...?" Giovanni started, hoping Ashkii would pick up from where he left off.

     Ashkii shrugged. "I don't know. Don't you feel a little bit weird that I thought about you that way, and maybe a bit worried that I might try something?"

     Giovanni cocked his head to the side, and the wave of dark curls that usually gathered at his neck fell to the side. "Ashkii, I think you're being a little bit too embarrassed about something everyone does."

     The younger man frowned, wondering if he heard right. "Something everyone does?"

     "Yes," Giovanni said, taking the empty glass in front of Ashkii before picking up a rag to clean up the counter. "When people find someone attractive, they think about them like that. It happens. I guess the part you messed up in was the part where you're not supposed to let the other person find out," Giovanni chuckled a bit, squatting to put away the glasses before standing on his feet again.

     Ashkii wasn't sure what to reply to, so he just stared.

     "Yes, it was a bit awkward, and I guess I took the teasing too far..." Giovanni trailed. "But that doesn't mean I hate you, or I'm disgusted by you, or I don't want us to keep being friends and meeting up like this..." Giovanni trailed, smiling a bit. "I missed having you around. It was boring not having anyone to talk to. I forgot how monotonous this work is."

     Ashkii felt his chest swell with warmth. Giovanni missed him. He wasn't sure why the revelation made his chest clench up and his head swoon. Maybe he had too much to drink.

     "I missed you too," the younger man said without much thought. He was met with an even wider smile from Giovanni. "And I'm sorry."

     "Sorry?" The older man raised a brow, a little confused.

     "Yeah..." Ashkii trailed. "I'm sorry for letting you find out like that—"

     Giovanni blinked, and then a small, "oh," left his lips when he realized what Ashkii was talking about.

     "I really like you..." Ashkii said, letting the words leave his lips. "You're the first man I've thought about like that, so I was just experimenting and trying to understand what I was feeling..." he continued even though Giovanni was starting to look a bit worried. The older man's eyes would dart to the side, or over Ashkii's shoulder. He was avoiding the younger man's gaze, but it didn't stop Ashkii from rambling on.

     "I think I understand now—no. I know now." Ashkii tucked his hands into his pockets, letting his face rest on Giovanni. The taller man was so captivating yet eerie. He felt like he would do anything just because Giovanni asked—anything to make the man smile at him in that casual seductive way of his. "I find you very attractive."

     "Ashkii—"

     "I enjoy our time together, and your friendship means a lot to me, but I don't think I can ignore the elephant in the room forever. It's not a one-time thing..." Ashkii trailed, taking in a deep breath. "I want you, and it's driving me crazy because I don't know if that's possible, and I know I'm not your type, but I guess a part of me is just hoping—"

     "Ashkii, shut up."

     Giovanni's stern voice startled the younger man a bit.

     "You're drunk," the bartender said in a definitive voice. "You should probably shut up if you don't want to dig yourself a hole."

     "But..." Ashkii started, wincing a bit as a sharp pain from the alcohol started to settle in. "I mean but I'm saying."

     "You don't want to fuck me."

     "I do. It's not just a fantasy thing."

     Giovanni signed, resting his arms on the table before looking straight into Ashkii's eyes. "Ashkii, I'm a man. I might be lean, and clean-shaven, but I'm a man." Their noses were almost touching, but all Ashkii could think about was how close their lips were. If he leaned in a bit they'd touch, and he'd get to taste the alcohol on the older man's lips.

     "Giovanni," Ashkii said in an almost whisper. "I know that already. I still want you."

     The older man blinked. He was a bit taken aback. "You're drunk," he said, standing up straight and looking away. "You can head up to the spare bedroom when you're ready to go to bed," the bartender said, walking towards the back door before slipping away. He was taking a break—he needed the break.

     The sudden emptiness of the bar and the absence of Giovanni made Ashkii feel a little lost. He had said what had been so hard for him when he got here earlier in the evening, and Giovanni had simply shut him down like he didn't know what he was talking about.

     There was a clogged feeling in his throat. It felt like he was going to throw up, but not alcohol—just all his pent-up feelings and anxieties that had compounded ten-fold after the exchange of words with the bartender.