A few days go by. I get to see Matsu, have fun with him, and then have to part ways. It's already sad as is, but Hisashi makes it worse by butting in. He keeps sitting with us while the others don't. He's even asked a few more times for me to have sex with him. I'm so sad... The one I want to do that with is Matsu but I don't know how we can... Hisashi would say something like "let me join" if I ask him to let us be alone in their cabin for a night...

I try to kiss him when we get a second to be alone during the day. When we pull away, Matsu looks like a sad puppy, not wanting to stop. It's killing me inside. I have to find a solution... Or something has to change... I don't know...!! We just can't keep going on like this...

On Saturday, I'm distracted and realize no one has asked me for help like they usually would. I notice that Matsu has done better in the class, and Teshima has more time to help the others. Surprisingly, I did well too even though my mind was mostly elsewhere.

Yuuma said that he'd have me and Matsu make up the time we got to skip out on the routine everyday. He has us stay later each day to make sure we're caught up on class. He's more lenient than I thought though, his threat about extra sessions from before seeming empty now. I'm actually a little glad we get to stay late because I have more time with Matsu, even if Yuuma is monitoring us so we can't hold each other or kiss.

(July 21)
Today seemed to drag on compared to the other days, I'm not sure why. So when I can finally go back to my cabin and get some shuteye, I kiss Matsu's cheek and head in after Kentaro and Gin have. I immediately get ready for bed and climb up onto the bunk bed. I fall onto my pillow and close my eyes. Nice and comfy... I wish to go to dreamland...

For some reason, my sleep is interrupted. It's dark and quiet as I blink and look around, trying to see why I woke up. Then I notice a head poking up from the end of the bed. Is that... Gin?? When Gin sees that I'm awake and I've seen him, he continues climbing into my bed.

"Gin...?? What are you doing...?" I whisper. Is Kentaro asleep? What time is it? Hold on, Kentaro didn't see him come up, right?? "Did Kentaro see you...?" I have to ask.

Gin kneels next to me. "He didn't see... He's asleep..."

I get a good look at him. His coat that he wears religiously is finally off and he has on sleepwear. Of course he can't sleep in that coat... If he was sleeping in it, I'd have to cut it off of him and burn it... Kentaro could help me with that since he mentioned burning stuff that one time...

"And... Um..." Gin continues to answer my other question. "I... I had a nightmare..." He looks down at his thighs, fiddling with the bow to adjust the waist on his pajama pants.

"A nightmare...? I see..." He's like a kid, seeking comfort from a parent when he has a nightmare. I guess since he's here, there's nothing to do but try to comfort him.

I lay my head back down onto my pillow. I pat the space next to me. He gets the message and lays down. We're close. But this may not be enough to comfort him... I put the blanket over him and wrap my arms around him. There. Now I'd like to keep sleeping...

Gin accepts my embrace and stays still in my arms. He's warm... And his hair is soft under my chin... He has his head down and against my chest. He still has his mask on, does he sleep with it on?? Wouldn't it be a bit hard to breathe...? I don't know... But there's something with him and that mask... I can't say anything... I'll just have to leave him be.

// POV (point of view) CHANGE //

Meanwhile, in Matsu and Hisashi's cabin. The two went to bed as usual. Matsu, however, couldn't sleep. It'd been days since he'd been with Akiara. He had strong desires like Akiara, wanting to have sex and feel pleasure. He especially liked doing it with him. Even though he'd done it with his homeless buddies plenty of times before, Akiara felt a little different. Maybe because his feelings for him had grown to be more than friendship.

So what should one do in this situation? Matsu wanted Akiara, but couldn't have him. When would he get to again? The answer was so unsure. Matsu would have to tide himself over until a miracle happened. And to do that, he'd have to try to get the same pleasure from his time with Akiara.

[]

// POV CHANGE OVER //

(July 22)
The whistle from Yuuma wakes me up. I have to yawn and wake myself up until I'm completely conscious. I just remember that Gin is in my arms. He slowly opens his eyes, seemingly disoriented.

"Good morning..." I yawn again.

"It's... morning...?" Gin asks. What's up? Does he have trouble getting up in the morning? But isn't he always up and ready before me...?

"Pfft... Yeah, it's morning." I rub his soft hair. He looks incredibly confused. Did he have a weird dream or something?

"......I slept...... until morning....." he said quietly. What's that about? Does he usually have trouble sleeping...?

Before I can ask, he gently pushes out of my arms and sits up.

"Sorry...." he says. "For suddenly asking to sleep with you..."

I sit up. "It's alright. You had a nightmare, right? Nightmares are awful."

He hesitates. Then he nods. He climbs down the bunk bed. I follow after him. I glance at Kentaro but he's got his pillow over his head, still trying to sleep.

Gin goes in the bathroom so I change outside to give him his privacy. After we're both ready, Gin looks at me. I smile.

"Let's head to the cafeteria," I say. He quickly follows me and walks next to me.

When we get there, Hisashi and Matsu are there, sitting across from each other. They look at us when we enter. I sit next to Matsu and Gin hesitantly sits next to me. Gin must not be worried about the kiss anymore, right...? He came into my bed saying he had a nightmare... And he didn't seem to have a negative reaction in the morning at all... Now he's sitting with us. I actually feel a little relieved... He doesn't hate me... But it shouldn't matter what he thinks... Right...?

Ana then comes to give us our breakfast.

"Hm..." Hisashi stares at us. "You two came together but it seems like you didn't do anything with each other..."

I glare. "What? Can't we just walk in together without something going on?" How does he even know?? He "smelled" it again?? I still don't understand how that works. What kind of nose picks up on something like that...?

Hisashi shrugs. "Perhaps. I'm just disappointed~"

Disappointed?? What in the world...

Kentaro suddenly enters the cafeteria. I look at the clock. It ticks to 7:30, the deadline for when we're supposed to be here every morning to avoid punishment. It's amazing how he's always just barely on time.

Kentaro realizes we're all sitting with each other. He looks unsure about what to do. I smile at him.

"Sit with us!" I say. He hesitates a moment longer. Then he sits across from Gin, putting space between him and Hisashi.

Hisashi smirks at Kentaro. Kentaro glares and scoots even further away, to the edge of the bench. Then Ana hands him his breakfast.

We all eat. Matsu nudges me with his elbow in the middle of it. I turn to him.

"A-Akiara... I n-need to talk to you l-later..." he says, looking away.

"Sure," I reply. Why does he look guilty...? I'll need to find a time for us to talk alone. We might have an opportunity during the day. Like when we do the community service activity, we can be outside and find a place to be alone for a second. Yuuma can't watch us 24/7.

The day goes on and the time eventually comes. I lead Matsu to a secluded area, out of sight from everyone.

"What's up?" I ask.

"Y-Yes... Well..." he hesitates. He looks even more guilty. What happened??

"What's wrong? You can tell me," I say. I grab his hands.

"Um..." It looks like he's trying to find the right words. "I... L-Last night, I..." He squeezes my hands and can't look me in the eye. "I-I accepted Hisashi's offer... F-For sex..." He quickly shakes his head. "Well, um...! B-Basically...! I was t-thinking about you... and... I... I-I touched myself... T-Then Hisashi saw... So... H-He offered... Then I-I accepted... Maybe I w-was too desperate... But I like y-you, Akiara! T-That won't change...! I... just..."

"It's alright, Matsu, you don't have to say any more." I stop his rambling. Matsu meets my eyes, concern filling his yellow eyes.

I try to process his words. He touched himself while thinking about me...? Hot... Wait, I mean... He had sex with Hisashi... I wonder what that was like...? Hold on, no... Um... How should I feel about this...

Honestly, I've been eyeing the other boys, even after I got with Matsu. I got to hold Gin as we slept and that was really nice... I want to see what he looks like with his clothes off and embarrassed... I bet it'll be cuteness overload... So I don't blame Matsu for wanting to get with someone else too. I don't feel betrayed even though you probably would in this situation, right? Hisashi's mention of having multiple partners... I wasn't sure when he first said it, but I think that might be fine... For me and whoever else accepts that too...

I squeeze Matsu's hands. "How was sex with Hisashi?" I ask seriously.

He looks surprised. "W-Well... It was... R-Really good..."

"Really good?? Better than me!?"

"U-Um...! Well...! Uh...!"

I laugh. "I'm joking! But now I'm super curious..."

He pauses. "...y-you aren't mad...?"

"No... I was thinking about what Hisashi said recently... About having multiple partners... And I think I'm open to that. Are you alright with that too?"

He brightens. "Y-Yes...! I h-had multiple buddies I-I did it with... S-So it's like I-I'm already used to it..."

"Then let's try it out! But we'll always be together too."

He nods. "Yes...! I-I want to be with y-you, Akiara!"

I beam. Then I grab his face and kiss him. He puts his hands on mine. Then we part. I frown.

"No, seriously, was he better than me?" I say.

He blushes, ashamed. "Y-Yes... It was r-really good... I-I didn't know sex l-like that existed..."

"What?? Really?? Now I feel like I have to accept his offer too..."

"B-But I still like you, A-Akiara! And I-I want to do it with you! I-I like doing it with y-you!!" Matsu exclaimed.

"Haha! I'm glad." I lean in, our lips almost touching. "I like doing it with you too." Then I give him a quick peck and let go. I turn to walk away, but stop and look back. "Let's go before Yuuma notices we're gone."

Matsu is blushing, looking lovestruck. He nods and we head back to complete our community service for today.

In passing, Hisashi strikes up a conversation. "Looks like your talk with Matsu went well~ He told you what happened?"

"Yeah..." I look away. Now that I've actually considered having sex with him, I'm suddenly getting embarrassed. It's true that he's very attractive... Even if what comes out of his mouth usually isn't...

"Then does that mean you're open to having more than one partner~? And you're open to having some fun with me~?" Hisashi steps closer, smirking.

I turn my head farther away. "Maybe..."

"You're getting me excited~ Don't be shy and come over anytime~ I'll let you experience something amazing~"

I glance at him. "....we'll see..."

Despite the unsure answers I gave him, Hisashi seemed happy the rest of the day. It's true I wouldn't mind trying it with him... But I still don't know how when we're in different cabins. The same dilemma with Matsu... Will I ever find the answer?