I wasn't sure why the question surprised me, but it did. I blinked back a few times. Pulling away from him before facing forward and staring at the red brick walls. "Yes, I do. I thought that was as plain as day?" I said, realizing that even though those were the feelings I had within me, I'd never properly expressed them verbally.

     "I love you," I said as I turned to face him. "I'm saying it now. I love you," I repeated reaching for one of his hands before giving it a soft squeeze. His hands weren't soft like in the winter, they had a rough texture like that of someone who worked a lot, which was the case now that we were in the middle of spring, but his fingers were lean, and those were the fingers that touched my skin and made my heart race when they teased my body or latched on to me playfully.

     "Do you—do you love me?" I asked, watching as Ahote's eyes grew wide. To be honest, it wasn't something I thought about, I had just put two and two together throughout our time together, but it seemed like it was something he thought about a lot, because my question made him nervous, and he didn't seem like he was able to meet my gaze.

     "Y-yes," he managed, finding his voice. His words made the edge of my lips tug up in a smile. It was so wide, and almost painful, even. I reached out to take his other hand, before giving it a soft squeeze as well.

     "Won't you look at me?" I asked, noticing that he wouldn't still meet my gaze.

     "I'm a little overwhelmed," he mumbled, and I chucked.

     "That's alright," I said, pulling him towards me before hugging him to my chest. Elan was sleeping alone in Ahote's room. He had passed out after having me make cups of hot chocolate for him. For whatever reason, it fascinated him, and I only stopped because I got scolded by one of the housekeepers who told me chocolate made the cubs sick.

     We stayed like that for a bit, hugging each other in the room lit by the orange glow of cheap fluorescence bulbs.

     Ahote stirred, and I loosened my grip a bit so that he had some space to adjust. He took the chance to sit up a bit, staring at me with a small smile before catching my lips with his. We kissed for a while. His soft tongue found its way into my mouth. He'd gotten better at kissing — at touching and allowing himself to enjoy the moment. It had taken a while for him to open u to the extent where he didn't seem scared of his urges or scared of me and mine. I realized that whatever had happened on that night he got pregnant and had sex for the first time must have deterred him.

     The thoughts about Honon didn't allow me to melt into the kiss as I had wanted to. I ended up breaking it, before getting off the bed and heading towards the closet.

     "Did I do something wrong?" I heard Ahote ask as I went through the closet to find what I was looking for.

     "No, I just remembered something that I should have shown you a long time ago," I muttered, finding the box of books, pictures, and stray exam papers.

     "For Honon," I said, turning to face him with the box I had in my hand. He looked perplexed, but once I walked over to the bed and dropped it on the mattress Ahote got a better look at its contents. He let out something that was a cross between a sob and a whine, and for a minute I wondered if it was a good idea to have brought it out. He must have known it was there or did he just never check?

     "Should I put it back?" I asked, noticing how Ahote was staring at the cardboard box like it was mail from Hades.

     "No. I just — I don't know," he mumbled under his breath, pulling his fingers as he looked from the box to me, and then at the box. "I don't want to look at her," he muttered, making me realize he must have noticed who his mate left him for.

     After some thought, I walked over to Ahote before taking a seat beside him at the edge of the bed.

     "She's really pretty," I muttered.

     "Yes," he said, agreeing with me in a matter-of-fact tone.

     "Does that make you upset?" I asked, scooting closer to him until our thighs were touching through the fabric of our pants. Ahote sighed, leaning forward before covering his face with his hands.

     "Before," he muttered.

     "What about now?" I asked, and he seemed to hesitate for a bit before saying, "I don't know."

     I hummed to myself before stretching behind him to pull the box to my side. I picked up the stack of pictures at the top before going through them myself. "Are you sure you don't want to look?" I asked, and Ahote raised his head a bit, peeking at me from the space between his fingers.

     "Why should I?"

     "If you're jealous of her doesn't that mean you still like Honon?" I asked, and Ahote sat still as if he had just realized something.

     "I haven't thought about him that way in a long while..." he trailed, and I nodded. It made sense. The few times we've slept together would have weakened their bond to a mere tinge. I wasn't sure if it could be completely broken, but while talking to Lupa he'd given me a reason to believe it was possible and it would just vanish over time.

     "Or you could just mark him to make the process faster."

     I swallowed down, blinking back when I remembered his words as we were crouched over the dead moose the hunters had just shot down. Marking was a sign of property claim — ownership, and marking something that has already been marked was like stealing, and it was sometimes it was seen as an outright challenge to ownership.

     That was why the rogue pack in the town over clashed so much with the Peace River pack. They went around marking already claimed territory. It was similar to a concept we had where I was from.

     "She's very pretty." Ahote's words brought me out of my thoughts. I hadn't noticed when I decided to look at the pictures I had in my hand.

     "But you know..." Ahote started, sitting up. "It doesn't bother me. I don't care," he said, and I looked at him, staring at the part of his neck where his shirt hung low and exposed his collarbone. I had an urge to reach out and touch it. I wanted to kiss him there — bite him there.

     "Is something the matter?" he asked, and I nodded being honest.

     "What is it?" he asked, cocking his head as if giving me a proper look would make him understand what was going on in my head.

     "You asked me if I wanted to get bound to you, and I said yes," I started, and Ahote nodded, showing me that he was following. "If I asked to mark you, would you say yes?" I asked, and Ahote seemed taken aback. He reached out for his neck where the fading pierce mark Honon had given him sat. To a human, they looked like two fading chicken pox scars, but to wolves, it meant so much more — it was only second to binding bracelets.

     "Yes," he said after a while, letting go of his neck. "I'd say yes. I'm saying yes," he muttered, nodding to himself as he pulled down his shirt a bit. "You can do it now."

     I wanted to do it, but I didn't want it to be rushed. I took off my shirt before reaching out to tug the hems of Ahote's and he got the message and took his off too. I leaned in to kiss him, letting my hand run down his chest as we deepened the warm kiss. As we sighed and mewled into each other's mouths we moved into the bed more and somehow knocked over the cardboard box filled with Honon's things.

     I pulled away from Ahote to remove my pants and underwear, before helping him out of his. We stayed in bed, touching, kissing, and staring at each other. I moved to spoon Ahote, kissing down his neck and shoulder as I let my hand travel to cup between his legs, as he moaned and bucked, I took the opportunity to press my emerged canines on his neck. His skin tensed against my teeth, and I could feel his pulse.

     He was nervous.

     "Do it, what are you waiting for?" he asked in a coarse tone as his hand reached out to rest over the one, I had between his legs. "I'll be fine."

     With a little hesitance, I pressed down, and Ahote let out a cry. I stayed put for a bit, as he spazzed, and tried to get used to the pain. When he had calmed down a bit, I drew out my teeth before coaxing the wounds I had created with saliva.

     I turned Ahote around so that he could face me. His face was wet, meaning that he had probably shed a few tears from the pain, and he was still shaking.

     "I'm sorry," I muttered, not knowing how to control the dread inside me at having to see the man I was in love with, in pain, because I was being a little selfish.

     "It's fine," he muttered, but the way he shivered as if recalling the pain didn't allow me to believe him.

     "You should mark me too — if you want," I said pulling him closer to me. His head was resting on my shoulder, and it just seemed like the right time. He nodded against my shoulder, pressing a kiss to it before biting down.

     It wasn't painless, but it wasn't as painful as I thought it would be. I guess I can simply withstand more because I've encountered much worse from hunting parties gone wrong.

     When Ahote withdrew his teeth and licked over the wound I felt them close a bit, and my chest was filled with happiness from the fact that what those scars were would be recognizable from tomorrow morning.

     I think Ahote was tired because he slept off after that, but I couldn't sleep. The way my heart was pounding in my chest wouldn't let me.

     Ahote was mine.

     Even if Honon showed up today, I wouldn't give him back.