Why am I always torn between the need to be accompanied and the desire to be alone? There are moments when I long for company, for someone to fill the silence, but soon after, I find myself overwhelmed. The noise, the relentless chatter, the pressure to engage in endless conversations—it leaves me drained. I just want to be alone, to think, to exist without interruption or expectation.

I’ve been reflecting on how they seem to get irritated so easily. What drives this constant frustration with the smallest things? A misplaced word, a minor inconvenience, or even the way something is done differently than they’d like—it all becomes a source of annoyance. It’s relentless, this cycle of irritation. Nothing seems to be simply “okay.” Everything is criticized, dissected, turned into a reason for dissatisfaction.

It’s exhausting, this constant tension. They never seem able to just let things slide, to relax and let the moment be. Instead, it’s a constant search for flaws, a relentless pursuit of something to be upset about. And I wonder if it’s me—if I’m the one who’s not cut out for this. Maybe I’m the one who struggles to navigate these dynamics, to find a way to belong without losing myself.

I feel so tired, worn out by the monotony of it all. Each day feels like a replica of the last—nothing changes, nothing improves. The same cycles, the same frustrations, the same feeling of being stuck. It’s like walking through an endless fog, searching for a way out but only finding more of the same. I try to push through, to make it feel different, but the weight of it all is too much.

I wish I could escape this loop, but where would I go? How can I escape myself?