LUC

I felt my chest squeeze up with anxiety when the cave entrance Jessie I'd been visiting with Jessie came into view. The moment I was dreading was finally here. My grip on him tightened, making him let out a gasp of discomfort. I willed myself it relax, churring apologetically as I dropped us another few meters towards the surface.

I would have to separate from Jessie for 'a while' as he'd put it. I had no concept of when I could come back for him, he'd only expressed that I shouldn't wait. It could be anything from a few hours to days... months maybe... Or, he could just never show up again. I tried to not let the thoughts worry me even as my mind screamed in protest, begging me to simply refuse his request as I dropped us another few meters.

His little hands shifted between his chest and mine as he craned his neck far enough to look at the ground. He had a rather filled to the brim human backpack on. His breathing was steady, but the smell of his pheromones was off. He wasn't afraid — just nervous. I liked the hair on his forehead away from his face, grooming him one last time as I made the final descent to the surface.

The weight of my feet under me felt shaky as they touched the surface. I held on to Jessie for moments longer, before softening my grip and putting him down. His human feet covering made a sound against the sand as he stepped away from me and held on to the straps of his bag.

"Here. Morning. Often." Jessie said softly, straining his neck to look up at my face. I looked down at him, nodding my head as I lowered my face to his. His breathing was irregular, but I deduced it was more from nerves than anything being wrong with him. I cupped his face in my hands, purring softly as his small hands reached up to touch mine, caressing my fingers as I licked his neck, ears, and then jawline. My lips found his, parting his lips open with my tongue, he sighed, opening his mouth even wider — accepting the kiss and the crop milk I funneled into his throat. I fed him as much as I could before pulling away and dropping my hands — they lingered in the small space between us as if I was worried I wouldn't be able to let him go if I touched him again.

"Luc..." Jessie called my name, making my eyes flicker to his. They were glassy now — something I'd come to see as an omen for the water that sometimes dripped from his eyes. He blinked rapidly, saying something in his human language under his breath before staring at me with that look that made me feel like I was his everything — his whole world. Grander than whatever his life had been in the stars before.

He shifted on his feet for a few more moments, before turning around and walking away. I watched him. Every step he took away from me made anxiety rise in me, but I held myself back from acting out. Soon, he was at the cave entrance, and two other humans appeared, holding familiar weapons. My wings flexed behind my back as adrenaline pumped through them, prepared for the worst, but it didn't happen. Instead, Jessie simply talked to the two people before following them further into the cave. I craned my neck when he was out of my vision, churring with worry. It took a while for me to digest what had happened.

He was gone.

Not safe in my line of vision or at the nest.

He was gone.

My arms felt empty, and my chest heavy. I lingered around the parameter for maybe another hour before taking off, flying to... I wasn't sure where really. Jessie wasn't in the nest. I wouldn't be greeted by his warm smiles, or calming voice any longer.

The anxiety in my chest shifted to deep despair and I snarled so loud my ears rang with the action. I did it again and again until my throat grew sore and my heart pounded rapidly against my. I flew in the direction of a cave I favored, swooping into it without much care for how the edge of my wings scraped painfully against the entrance because I didn't pull them in on time. I winced, tumbling a bit before curling up in a corner, and covering my form with my wings.

I snarled again — long hard and labored, waiting for the feeling of loss to wear off.

The day went by, and the entrance to the cave grew dark, with it came the cooling of the air and the drizzle that harbingered the start of a storm. I sat in the dark, listening to the clouds' thunder as flowing water started dripping to the floor from the cage entrance above.

If Jessie was here he would have made a fire in seconds. My eyes flickered, and my chest gave way to the feeling of longing as my mind imagined Jessie eating his soft stones, and fruit. My tongue pressed up the roof of my mouth as I imagined licking the flakes and stickiness off him — touching him, holding him, taking in the alien scent of him.

Mine.

My Jessie.

I was so deep in thought that I didn't notice the sound coming from above until a loud thud hit the floor. My eyes shot up, and for a second I thought I saw Jessie, but I was mistaken. The human's skin was darker, hair curlier and lips fuller, and it looked female. My surprise at seeing a human's face made me forget — briefly — that someone was holding them tight against them.

"Runt."

My blood ran cold at the sound of Kao's voice. My eyes moved from the human's face to stare at his. His green eyes gagged me with interest, as his grip tightened even more around the human's chest — the creature was knocked out — unresponsive. For a moment I wondered if it was dead, but a jagged breath told me otherwise.

Slowly, I stood up, doing my best to hide the caution rising inside me. I held Kao's graze — my brown eyes piercing his green ones. Even at my full height, I felt Juvenile to him. I spread out my wings, using the only thing that was the proper size on my body to give me more size.

"If you want the cave for the storm, I'll leave," I offered, even though my gaze lingered on the human being. I had questions. I wondered who they were, and if they were with Kao willingly. I doubted it, considering their condition, but... Jessie had been hurt too when I found him. Maybe — no. I took back the thought that Kao would be saving the thing's life. Kao wasn't like that.

The alternative explanation made me swallow down a chur. Is he going to trade it? I wondered, feeling agitated. I never went back to the cliffside market, so I had no idea if the scale of the trade was maybe even worse now or more common.

"No, I came looking for you," Kao said. "I followed your wailing," He added smugly, as he stepped closer to me.

"Why?" I asked, raising a brow at him.

Kao looked down at the creature in his hands. "These things are so weak... they refuse to eat anything," he started, "when I get this female they'd promised me she was strong, but all she does is sleep."

I swallowed, taking him in his words. So, Kao wasn't selling the human, he had bartered for it.

"Months ago, I saw you carrying one, and I found it still alive months after. You have one — you stash it away, but I've noticed it here and there. It looks healthy. How do you take care of it?"

My lips parted, but words didn't come out. I had to express to Kao that this wasn't some sort of pet... He had to return the human to its people, but the age-old fear in me that festered from my smaller size was holding me back. I got to survive by being quiet and not picking fights — by letting Helli who were bigger than me get away with everything and anything. I debated what I should do. On one hand, telling Kao to return the human for its own good was only going to make him angry, but I could make him see reason if I mentioned that the humans would retaliate.

I winced, remembering the exact moment the metal claw had clamped down on my foot. It had been a pain like no other, and the wound had taken over a month to heal. I still had a brutal jagged scar where my skin had been ripped open.

"Kao..." I started gently, lowering my head a bit to show that I wasn't trying to challenge him. "Those things are not pets—"

The bigger Helli chuffed, barring his teeth. "Says you? What's yours?"

My eyelids flickered a couple of times, feeling my chest pang. I knew Kao didn't know what I thought of Jessie, but there was a mild feeling of shame that was rising in me that made the feathers on my neck and shoulders stand up.

Who cares what he thinks? I tried to calm myself. Jessie is perfect.

"The creature with me is with me of its own volition," I said. "I saved it — cared for it. It stays because it wants to."

Kao chuffed. He didn't seem to believe me. "You give me a speech about not taking a lesser animal for a pet, but you have one that you keep safe, feed, protect, and it does nothing in return. It does not even speak. What makes that different from a pet? Unless of course, you're mating it—"

I couldn't help the small snarl that escaped me as my lips drew back to reveal my teeth.

Kao's eyes went wide as he cocked his head to the side. I couldn't quite pinpoint the expression on his face. It looked like a mix of shock and curiosity and of course... disgust.

I snarled again, not being able to help myself. He would stop speaking about Jessie like that even if it meant I had to take a few blows for it.

"By the forebears... you are mating it," Kao said, looking down at the human in his hand with renewed curiosity. "How does that even work... how don't you break it? They are so weak and fear for everything. It does not speak. How does it be with you of its own volition if it does not speak? Luc—"

"Jessi, is a person, and he does speak," I said, cutting him off, as the pumping of my heart rang in my ears. "I am not ashamed, and I haven't done anything wrong. I have only loved freely, and it has been reciprocated."

"I know the fate of runts is not an easy one," Kao said as his eyes softened. "The strongest and biggest of the flock get to mate and keep resources, but that is how Helli produce healthy and strong progeny. Like in a tree, the weaker branches simply wither off and die, and it is for the best for the plant—"

"Kao, these Hum— these creatures are not weak. They are small, yes, but they are intelligent. They make weapons beyond you or I's imagination, and they will come for their brethren, or exterminate us while trying. Why risk this to keep pets?"

"Their fire stones pale in comparison to to thickness of a Helli's bare back. Maybe you are afraid because you are smaller, but I am not," Kao said.

His gaze on me softened. "I don't know what you've to tell yourself to bond to that creature of yours, but I hope you remember that it is an animal. It will make no eggs."

I snarled again.

"I tease you a lot, Luc, but do know I have pity for you. Runts are better off not living past adolescence. Life without fulfilling the prime directive is cruel. No progeny. No mate. No flock that would accept a weakling," Kao said.

"If mating with an animal dulls that pain, I understand, regardless of how abhorrent. I will not tell anyone," he said, spreading his wings and looking up towards the cave's entrance.

"Fruit," I said, curling my wings back as Kao prepared to take off. "They eat fruit and dried meat. Give the creature lots of water— they do not do well high up in the mountains. Keep them away from rain, they get sick," I added, knowing that if I didn't give Kao some information, the human might die.

Kao blinked at me, smiling a bit as he picked at the human's curly hair. "Thank you."

And with that, he was gone. I noticed it was quiet outside too. I hadn't noticed the storm had stopped in the middle of our heated argument. I churred, restless as I pranced around, my mind shifting from Kao to Jessie.

I hoped he was safe.