“The closet back there is huge,” Skyler said, walking over to Mr Lee who was leaning against the sinks as Skyler roamed. “I’ll for sure be able to fit the two gas kilns I bought in there.”

“That’s good then,” Mr Lee said, sipping his coffee again. This room certainly caught a draft, ‘It’ll be nice to replace those windows before next fall if we can,’ Mr Lee thought to himself, already letting himself be committed to helping in the fixing up of the classroom. 

“Pretty far from your classroom though, huh?” Skyler said, walking further over towards Mr Lee and leaning against the sink next to him.

“Walking is healthy, I sit too much most days. Besides going to get the bad coffee from the teachers’ lounge that is.” Mr Lee chuckled a little as he sipped some of that bad coffee, he always loved pointing out how bad it was while drinking it. Clare found that little quirk less funny with each passing day, but Skyler’s response was different from her exasperated sighs.

“Guess I’ll have to get a better coffee machine to keep down here, then you’ll really get your steps in to come here even when you aren’t helping to teach.” His ceaseless problem-solving, or positivity? Whatever you call the vibe he had, it was relentless, but still sweet in a way.

“Well, I’ll spend about half my days down here it sounds like. On paper only I’ll be teaching more classes than anyone else.” 

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. Four history classes, and then three periods will be spent down here. Technically this is against the school’s policy on how many classes someone can teach, but Mr Hayer found a loophole since you’ll be assisting me,” Mr Lee swirled his coffee around in his mug, staring deeply into it. “Besides, since I won’t be doing much of any teaching, I can spend my time down here like I would have any other free period.”

“Still, only one free period?” Skyler tutted as he shook his head. “I’ll make sure you can get work done while you're down here.”

“You are very kind for that.” Mr Lee couldn’t help but smile as he watched the whirlpool of coffee slowly come to a halt, cueing him to take another sip.

“We can put a desk in that closet by the kilns, the room is massive after all, and it won’t be unpleasant when they aren’t being fired,” Skyler said, looking back out to the room, re-imagining the floor plan he had come up with.

“Oh, that’s too much.” Mr Lee answered after swallowing the last sip of his coffee. “If there is any clean space in here that’ll be fine. I’m not bothered by the sounds of others, I’m used to the white noise.”

“I’ll get a desk to put over by that window then, and then we’ll keep that table clay-free.” Skyler smiled, leaning back a little more he sighed a sigh not of exasperation, but anticipatory joy. “This room will be really nice, don’t you think?”

“Once the work gets put in it will,” Mr Lee agreed. Maybe– maybe that crazy mother’s craziness had been a blessing for once.

“I wanted to ask earlier, it was the glaze you called paint on my leg that told you who I was, wasn’t it? Did you remember me from back then, before Mr Hayer reminded you my name?” Skyler asked earnestly, he wasn’t looking towards Mr Lee as he spoke, still facing the ceiling as he leaned back, but Mr Lee didn’t need to see Skyler’s face to sense what expression it bore.

“Of course,” Mr Lee answered, “I brought up your friendship with Chloe, didn’t I? You especially though were always in my classroom weren’t you, working away on sketches and homework during any free period that coincided, lunch too sometimes. Isn’t that right?” It was sweet in a way, how much Skyler cared about these things. Still, it’d be better if he cared a little less, wouldn’t it?

“Yeah, yeah I did spend a lot of time in your room. It had a good view, and you always had some nice music on.” Skyler acted as if those were his reasons, and maybe Mr Lee believed it - he had back then after all. “Anyway, you heard I’d only be watching TV tonight, did you have any Friday night plans, Mr Lee?” Skyler finally turned to face Mr Lee again as he spoke.

“Ahh, none more exciting than yours I’m afraid.” Mr Lee answered, flashing a quick smile to Skyler. He couldn’t have said that his only standing Friday night plans were with tears and liquor.

“Have you eaten?” Skyler asked, still looking towards Mr Lee. Still smiling brightly.

“I haven’t had dinner yet. Unless you count coffee that is.” Mr Lee wryly joked.

“No, no one counts coffee as dinner,” Skyler replied with a side eye towards Mr Lee. Did he think Mr Lee had been genuine? “Want to get something to eat then? We could talk about plans for the class?” his eyes twinkled when he asked– but even that was to no avail.

Facing Skyler directly, Mr Lee paused for a moment before he shook his head. Speaking softly, he answered “No I can’t today I’m sorry. I’ve got quite a bit of grading to get through, but we can talk about details once we have our meeting about the class next week.” Going out to get a meal from somewhere besides a microwave did sound nice. Having good food, and spending an evening not entirely alone might have been nice– but Mr Lee had to be practical in that moment. The prospect of going to dinner, with his drinking tendencies, and with a former student no less? 

“A-alright,” Skyler answered, that twinkle fading off into the vastness from which it came. “Do you have to get going then?” 

“Yes, unfortunately.” Mr Lee’s hands found themselves slightly gripping Genghis Khan's face once more, as his eyes looked down to his hands again. His thumb had scabbed over where he was picking at earlier. “Here, I’ll walk you out.”

“Thank you. We will have a meal together some other time then, we have the whole summer to prepare after all.” Skyler spoke as if he was reassuring himself as much as he was telling Mr Lee a plan. If he’d meant to say that out loud was quite unclear to Mr Lee.

After a pause that lasted slightly too long, Mr Lee answered with an uneasy “...Sure,” Once he saw how Skyler’s posture –which Mr Lee hadn’t even noticed became slouchy– straightened, and eyes perked up, he regretted saying it. 

They stayed in silence while Mr Lee led them back to the school’s front door, and waving back at him, Mr Lee stayed silent even as Skyler said over his shoulder “Goodbye Mr Lee, it was nice running into you!”

He stayed silent as he walked up to his room, and as he traded the mug in his hands for his worn-out messenger bag. Slipping the papers, ungraded and graded inside, he started back down the stairs. Mr Lee only noticed he had begun picking his thumb again during that time when he had to stop so he could grab the stair rail.

It’s strange how a moment could put you at ease in some ways, yet make you feel terribly guilty in others. Guilty?

Mr Lee was sure that was the feeling he was experiencing. As for what that guilt pertained to, he hadn’t the foggiest idea.

✧⚞✦⚟✧

By the time Mr Lee got home, it was just past dinner time and the sun had only just begun setting, though Mr Lee felt as if it was well past midnight. Opening the door to his apartment Mr Lee slid off his shoes, leaving them by the door as he set his bag down on the kitchen table before walking into the kitchen. Once he washed his hands, he grabbed a bag of coffee grounds beside his coffee machine and started a pot.

The machine seemed out of place in his apartment. It was the one fancy appliance amongst a sea of sensible, affordable purchases. Its rich brown colour helped it blend into the outdated yet cozy kitchen, but still, when you looked closely you could tell it was different. There was a quick explanation for this though, it was the one item in his kitchen not purchased by Mr Lee himself. It’d been a gift from Jason. Maybe that was why Mr Lee always thought about having a stronger drink when he started a pot of coffee.

Usually on weekends –and some weekdays too– Mr Lee gave into that urge. He’d work some, and have a single glass while he did so; but no evening ended on a single glass, just like no day ever passed by on a single cup of coffee.

But today, once Mr Lee finished picking a coffee mug out of the sink left there in the morning and washing it to use, and he was sat leaning against the counter watching as the glass pot slowly filled, he didn’t grab out a wine glass. He didn’t go to his cabinet and grab out a bottle of the cheap wine he bought in bulk either. Rather, he just waited for the coffee to finish with a patient smile. He was too distracted to want that wine, his mind thinking through what the steps of replacing windows were, not that he’d ever done it before.

Once the pot had filled, Mr Lee poured himself the first of what would be a few cups tonight before walking back to his kitchen table. Pulling out the remaining papers to grade, he got to work finishing them between trips to refill his coffee. By the time he’d finished all the assignments, the sun had finished setting in the evening sky, and the boldest stars were beginning to shine. Heading back into the kitchen, Mr Lee poured the last cup from his pot of coffee and walked over to his cabinets.

Scanning through each cupboard, he went past the bottles of wine, and the backup bags of coffee grinds. He looked past the half-eaten chips, the stale cookies and the teas almost as old as this apartment, grabbing instead a bag of microwave popcorn Mr Lee must have bought months ago– or maybe Jason had brought it over one night. But that didn’t really matter, it shouldn’t.

Unwrapping the plastic and putting it in the microwave, Mr Lee ignored the bag’s instructions and simply clicked the popcorn button. Watching it spin, Mr Lee’s mind was in a trance. He wasn’t sure what compelled him to grab the bag, he had been on autopilot when he opened the cupboards. Mr Lee had half expected himself to grab a bottle before sitting back down at his dinner table to hold his head in his hands. Popcorn… now that was a pleasant surprise, something about it had just caught his eye.

When the microwave beeped, Mr Lee went over and grabbed the bag from the microwave, quickly dropping the toasty bag on the countertop to cool.

‘Better grab a bowl’ Mr Lee thought to himself, grabbing out a metal mixing bowl, and placing it down beside the popcorn. Pinching the edges, he peeled the bag open and let the steam flow out freely. Holding his hands above the steam for a moment, his hands went limp in relief. The perpetual throbbing in his thumb relaxed for a moment as his hands relished in the moisture. 

Leaving the popcorn to cool, Mr Lee went to his bathroom and looked for a bottle of lotion. Pushing aside empty mouthwash bottles, piles of other toiletries, old medicine containers, and a few beer cans left on the counter but still finding nothing he resorted to searching the drawers. It was in the middle left drawer that he found a bottle of spiced apple hand lotion, it must have been two years old. Surely Clare gave it to him as a gift, there was no one else he knew who would have bought such things.

Putting it on his hands, the lotion rubbed in smoothly, and the scent was intense. ‘Maybe Skyler uses products like this. No, he’d probably have fancier brands.’ Mr Lee thought to himself. He set the bottle atop the counter this time, shutting the light off in the bathroom as he left, Mr Lee didn’t bother grabbing the cans or other trash that remained. It’d been there for ages already anyway.

Once he was back in the kitchen, Mr Lee poured out his bowl of popcorn and brought it to the small loveseat he called a couch in front of his TV. Turning it on and opening Netflix he scrolled through the endless lists of shows and movies. 

‘I should have asked Skyler for a recommendation…’ He thought to himself as he scrolled past show after show and none stood out to him. After pausing to take a bite of popcorn, Mr Lee decided to just rewatch something, which was always an easy option.

Opening the Watch It Again category, there weren’t many shows in it. Over the past few years, he almost only ever watched TV if it was with Jason, and usually at Jason’s place.

Trying to shake his mind from that man though, Mr Lee clicked on The Blacklist, crime dramas are always fun. It had been a show his mom recommended to him as well, years ago when it was still airing its first few seasons. Jason had never really gotten into it, so at least watching this Mr Lee’s mind could maybe be taken off of that man.

‘I wonder if Skyler watches crime dramas…’ Mr Lee’s thoughts trailed off as the cold opening of the episode he chose began. A plane was crashing from the sky, the episode was from season one, it was about some anticapitalist scheme. Mr Lee had seen the whole show over about ten times.

Taking another bite of popcorn while he watched, Mr Lee stood up to get something to drink, the salty snack drying his mouth. Opening his fridge, there wasn’t much inside. Not to drink at least. There was a half-finished bottle of wine, soy milk, and two sparkling waters scattered amongst the mess of food. 

Shutting the fridge door, he just grabbed a glass of water –hot of course, Mr Lee always ran cold– and sat back down on his couch. For the first time since he and Jason–

For the first time in a while, Mr Lee’s standing Friday night plans with a bottle had been skipped. It wasn’t a conscious intent to avoid it, Mr Lee had long accepted that it made him feel better, and if he was able to go to school on the coming Monday did any of it matter?

He hadn’t even fully realized it’d been weeks since he avoided the bottle when he sat on the couch watching Liz and Reddington bicker on his TV screen. 

Another thing Mr Lee hadn’t realised was, that if he had gone home when school ended today, or if he had only spent half an hour grading, he would surely have been having the same weekend he always did. This today, this anomaly in his recent life– was thanks to Skyler. And while the younger man wouldn’t know it, and while Mr Lee wouldn’t come to fully appreciate this today for quite a while, it made all the world of a difference.