Chapter 12 - Leo

“Leeooo!” 

I pull my sneakers off and turn to see my 5’10 blonde best friend plop down on the bench I’m sitting on. From the back, Eli puts his arms around me and rests his chin on the nook of my shoulder. “I’m sooo tired. Please save me.” 

I caress his arm with my hand. “Do you want me to cover some of your shifts?” Eli has taken it upon himself to work almost every shift available. He’s not in school so he has a lot of free time, and is saving up to take a 6-month Europe vacation in the summer. His parents recently lowered his allowance but one thing about Eli, he knows how to hustle. Which is probably why we get along so well. 

“Nooo. Cuz then I’ll see less of you than I already do.” He whines. 

On the other hand, a few days ago I decided to take fewer shifts. It’s not that I don’t like working here because I do. I consider all of my co-worker's friends and my boss, Greta, is like a mom to me. She literally calls all of us her babies. The men that come here aren’t as gross as the guys I’ve seen at strip clubs, and Greta makes sure of that. In the few instances, when a customer had too much to drink and got handsy with one of us, Greta didn’t even hesitate to call security. On one of the walls in our break room, there are currently 5 pictures of men who are to be thrown out if they try to enter. A couple of weeks ago one of them tried to come back and Greta chased him out with a broom yelling, “if you ever even lay your eyes on one of my babies again I’ll rip your eyes out!” She really doesn’t mess around. 

I haven’t had the heart to tell Eli or Greta that I plan to quit before I go back to school. I haven’t even told Jordan because I feel guilty that I got angry at him for telling me I didn’t have to do this job anymore. But in a weird way, I’m glad we had that fight because it made us closer, as fucked up as that sounds. Plus, it would have taken centuries for one of us to make the first move if he didn’t that night. 

“Oh!” Eli removes his chin from my shoulder. “What’s up with you and Mr photographer? He doesn’t come around here anymore. Did you guys have a falling out? Do I need to beat him up.” I chuckle as I slip on my Dr. Martens and rummage through my locker. “No, we’re good. We’re still seeing each other.” 

Jordan and I have been seeing each other daily for the past couple of weeks. We’re both busy during the day, me working and him preparing to start working again. But we still find time to see each other. 

I don’t know what he thinks we have but I’m trying to not get attached. Even though I’m obviously failing at that given how much my cheeks hurt from smiling whenever he texts me. But once I start school and he goes back to work, we won’t see each other as much, so I’m trying to prepare myself for that.

———

I’m lounging on the bed as I watch a hot 6’3” man walk back and forth between his closet and the suitcase on his bed. He’s packing for a trip back home. It’s a Monday night and he’s packing for a trip that’s in 4 days. I love how prepared he always is because I sure as hell wouldn’t pack anything until the day of my flight.

Jordan breaks into a smile when he notices me watching him as he tosses a shirt onto a pile on the bed. “What?” His voice is low and husky. He has his usual silk shirt on, but unbuttoned all the way down, giving me a front row seat to his body. I roll over onto my stomach and nestle my head into my crossed arms. “You always plan so far ahead. I like it. You’d be a good husband.” 

He makes direct eye contact and holds it for a bit longer than usual. “Do you want to get married?” 

I raise my brows at him. “Are you proposing to me?” 

He rolls his eyes and sits down on the bed. “No you smartass, you know what I was asking.” A smile overtakes my cheeks as he begins folding clothes and organizing his suitcase.

 I continue to tease him. “Jordan this is so sudden I don’t know if I’m ready to be a bride.” His lips pull upward, and a growing smile overtakes his fake agitation. 

I’ve never actually given marriage a thought. People make it look so miserable. Most of the kids I went to school with had either divorced parents or one of their parents was having an affair. It never made any sense to me. Why would you commit to someone you know you won’t spend the rest of your life with? 

“To answer your question, no, not really. Do you?” 

He zips the inner pocket of the suitcase. “Yeah, I do.” Jordan has only dated girls so it’s probably different for him. Getting married is a much bigger deal for heterosexual couples. 

I prop myself up on an elbow. “Do you want kids?” 

He immediately crinkles his nose. “Fuck no.” 

My mouth falls open. “Damn. That was an aggressive response.” I’m actually shocked at his answer. He seems like the type to want a house, a big family, and a golden retriever. The American dream or whatever. Even more so, the fact that he has a little brother he takes care of and adores, I thought he’d want kids. He folds his last pair of bottoms, black pleated pants, and shuts the suitcase. Giving me a nod while he zips it shut he returns the question and I answer. 

“Yeah, I want two kids. A boy and a girl.” Jordan picks up his wine glass from the nightstand and moves towards me on the bed. “That’s so specific. Why two kids?” He lays 2 feet from me and mirrors my position. His long hair is just past his chin and he keeps one side tucked behind his ears. I fixate on his hands as he takes a sip from his glass. 

“Because when I was growing up I always wanted a brother or sister. I want them to have each other and know that they always have someone looking out for them.” If I have kids I don’t want them to go through what I did. 

Jordan watches my expression, probably waiting for me to say more. He’s told me that my face is hard to read, which wouldn't be the first time I’ve heard that. But instead of getting annoyed at me for not expressing what I was feeling on my face, he said he liked it. “It adds to your mysteriousness,” he had said.  “And it keeps me guessing what you’ll say next because I never know.”

He finishes taking a long swig and scrunches his brow. “I was going to make a joke and say we always want the opposite thing, but now you’re making me reconsider.” I lay back down on my stomach and rest my head over my crossed arms. Instead of eye level, I’m now looking up at him. “I can’t believe you don’t like kids, that’s so fucked up. What did they ever do to you?” 

He raises a thumb. “Shit, piss and puke everywhere.” He raises his index finger. “Scream and cry all night for no damn reason.” Third finger up. “Throw toys that you got for them at you and only ever spit up their food on the clothes you got them.” 

Okay, that one sounded personal. I suppress a smile. “Is this about Maisie?”

Maisie is Mason’s 4-month-old baby who absolutely despises Jordan for no reason. Mason came over with her one day and the minute she saw Jordan she started bawling. “Jordan you’re so ugly you’re scaring her.” Mason teased while bobbing her up and down. Jordan just crossed his hands and retorted a “fuck off she should be used to being scared by now with your face around” before they both started laughing. Their friendship is strangely heartwarming and familiar. Mason walked towards us on the couch while Jordan walked behind him so Maisie wouldn't see him. The minute Maisie saw me she stopped crying. We were all dying laughing and Jordan defensively crossed his arms and said “Seriously?”  She let me hold her and even started giggling when I played peek-a-boo with her. Mason asked me if I wanted to be her godfather instead of Jordan. Jordan just stood there shaking his head pretending to be annoyed, but I could sense his affection. 

“No, it’s not about Maisie.” He rolls his eyes and puts his glass to his mouth. 

“Your brother then?” 

He shakes his head. “Jamie was a good kid. Surprisingly. Yeah, he was a brat 90% of the time but,” he shrugs. “That’s just how little brothers are wired to be.” The mention of Jamie makes me remember I’ll be meeting him soon.

“He’s coming in two weeks right?” That’s the same time Danny gets back, just a couple of days before school starts. He sits up and stretches his arm towards the side table to set down his empty glass. “Yup. It’s about to be a lot louder around here soon.” I smile thinking of how loudly Jamie talks on the phone, I can’t imagine how loud he is in person. I sit up with my knees under me. “I’m nervous, what if he doesn’t like me?” 

I’m shocked when he gets up and walks toward the bathroom. I was expecting one of his usual lines like “no one could ever dislike you.”

So what the hell? 

I almost trip over my feet getting up. Before I reach the bathroom door  he’s walking back out. I stand in front of him to block him and cross my arms. “Wait, does he not like me? Did he say something?” I rack my brain to think of why he would hate me. “No, he didn’t exactly say anything.” He emphasizes. I wait for him to add more.

“He’s just upset at me because I’ve been missing his calls lately. And he knows I’m seeing someone. And he’s not stupid so he put two and two together.” He gives me a reassuring look and rubs the sides of my arms. “He doesn’t know you yet. Once he does he’ll love you.” 

I give him a blank stare. His little brother is not going to love someone who is the reason his older brother isn’t picking up the phone. Especially given how close they are. It hits me suddenly that in the past few weeks, I haven’t seen him talk to his brother. Because of the time difference, the only time they can talk is when it’s late at night here. And I’m here every night. And I haven’t seen him talking to him once.

“You know you can pick up the phone when I’m here. I don’t mind.” I’m confused about why he stopped calling him. Did he say something to Jordan? Like, don’t call me when that guy is over at your place. I keep my face blank, not wanting to give away how I’m actually feeling. 

I didn’t even consider the possibility that Jamie would not like me and I feel like an idiot for not thinking about it until now. Jordan positions his arms on either side of the wall. “Nah it’s just,” he begins and breaks eye contact with me to look over my head. “The last couple of times my phone was on do not disturb. He called me while we were in the middle of something.” He looks back at me. “Something I wouldn’t be too eager for my baby brother to hear.”

Oh. 

I cover my mouth to keep myself from laughing as the realization hits me. He rakes his hair back and walks around me. I see a hint of a smile on his face. I follow him to the bed and crawl into it and under the covers before he does. 

“You know, we can have morning sex instead if that’s easier.” 

He tilts his head from side to side at my suggestion. “I’m not a morning sex type of guy,” he gestures at himself. “I feel like you have to be a certain type of guy to enjoy morning sex, you know?” 

“Night sex gets boring after a while though.” 

He casts a skeptical look. “Really? People like having sex with morning breath?” He’s so annoying that I have to fight the urge to smile at some of the things he says. We do this thing where when we disagree on something trivial that we both know is a joke, we keep prodding each other until one of us admits defeat. You know how couples will purposely have fights so the sex after is incredible? It’s like that except no actual yelling and arguing. He motions for me to move over wearing just black sweatpants that aren’t tied so his V-line is fully visible. I move over in the bed, not realizing I was practically on the edge of the bed ready to mount him. Once he’s under the covers we face each other. 

“It’s either night sex and your brother hates me. Or morning sex and your brother semi, maybe, likes me.” 

He watches my lips as I speak. “Well, when you put it that way. Morning sex it is.” He moves closer and I feel his breath on my lips, I can almost taste the wine on his lips. “But we need to have night sex one last time just so I can commit every second of it to memory.” Instead of kissing me, he fakes me out and goes for my neck. I’m smiling knowing that we both know won’t be the last time we have sex at night, but I pull him closer. 

“Okay,” I play along. “One last time.”