Paige Johnson

After our dinner, we decided to stroll around the neighbourhood and I couldn't help but notice the stares. "Do we look strange?" I asked weirdly as I stared back at those people.

"No, it's just the neighbourhood. It's small and word gets out fast, I mean really fast. If someone fell and died in the morning, the neighbour's grandchildren living in another state would have already heard about it by sun down," he chuckled ridiculously.

"It's nice to know they care," Janey commented.

"So, what happened? Did you fall?" She asked.

"I fell for the wrong reason, that's what happened." I almost forgot about the fight with his partner but not in full detail. They've been together for a few years but dad never pops out the big question. He loves her and she does too but things didn't work out.

Nova was dad's first customer. She was the first person who walked into a new restaurant and stayed. She knew mom. She knew us since we were little. She's my favourite regular customer because of her adventurous soul to try anything new.

She was also one of the few customers who actually reached out when the restaurant suddenly closed. I had to explain what had happened. She comforted me through the phone and came down to the funeral with flowers and food - worried that we would starve ourselves was what she said.

She was a nice lady and we were happy dad saw a new spark in his life. Especially when dad started to change after mom's death. He would act so strongly during the funeral and days after: he talked to people, smiled and even joked about how mom would be so mad if we didn't wash the dishes that night.

Then, as people started to stop visiting, his exterior facade began to crumble. He would be so lost that eating had to be reminded.

All he did everyday was sit in their bedroom, on the floor, look through pictures and read their letters while listening to her favourite playlist.

The room would be riched in her scent as if she was getting ready for their usual Friday date.

Friday was the worst day for him, he would lock the door and cry until the next morning. The TV would be on, replaying their favourite movies.

Everyone was worried, I almost stopped caring for the restaurant but a gentle pat on the shoulder reminded me that this was theirs. This restaurant was started by mom and dad, and I should never give it up.

So, I had to force him out of the house and bring him along to work. I've made him try new recipes, complained about bad customers and let him supervise new cooks.

On Friday, Janey and I would be his new dates. We go to the movies and hunt for restaurants. Dad slowly opened up: he would comment on the food, laugh at hilarious scenes, order popcorn and drinks, choose the next movie.

He was starting to steadily move forward. He comes down to the restaurant as often as before. Talked to regular customers and whenever they talked about mom, he would smile in delight.

"Your mom would be so happy if she knew the presence she had left on people."

"I'm sure she knows and I bet she's smiling in heaven right now because you're doing all better. She would be so proud because remembering her is bringing nothing but joy in your heart. We are so proud of you, daddy." Janey replied as we snuggled into dad's bed. It was raining and it felt like one of those nights that everyone just needed to stop what they were doing and snuggle with each other.

Nova's presence was also helping dad. They would talk for hours and sometimes even went out for coffee. Then one day, she came to the movie with us.

"I think I'm falling in love again," it has been two years since mom's death and dad is back to his old self but with a bit of improvement.

You can never be your old self because as long as the clock is ticking, you'll always be in a different situation even if it looks the same. It's life's way of teaching you about new things: the taste, feels and touch.

That was what grandma always said before she left us. Wrote it in a letter for me to hold onto and remember because I was angry at myself for not being able to be better. I wanted to be the girl who was good at everything but once I started working, I was in shambles.

That letter will forever be my saviour.

"That's great! She's friendly, a platinum level foodie, loves your food, and a great support," I listed out. She's a nice fit for dad and everyone agreed.

But what's in front isn't always what's inside. As the leaves changed and the wind grew colder, so did she. Her true colours were never colourful as she portrayed and we never judged her for it but this was different.

She was more controlling, especially on the matters of the restaurant. The taste of the food, the number of staff, the appearances of the restaurant and so on. Dad followed her because she sounds so convincing, so right.

However, the restaurant grew gloomier and people started to stop coming. It was starting to get out of business so I told him the truth.

The reason why he let go and retreated to a new life, a slower-paced surrounding, was to get her away. Nova wasn't happy, she was furious but she still followed dad.

Despite all of that, dad still loves her because she was there for him just like how mom was there for him when I was little.

She ended everything because she loves him but not enough to stay with him. Dad let her go because he loves her but not enough to let her stay.

"I was tricking myself and it burdened her. She felt like she needed to be like Harper. She tried to but it was too much of a role. She calmed down when we came here but maybe our feelings didn't reach so we said goodbye," she was crying that day and it was Friday. They went to see a remake of mom's favourite movie.

"She stopped midway. Let go of my hand. Her eyes avoided mine before letting out a sigh, a heavy one. Slowly she looks up, her eyes glister with sadness and tears. She was struggling to let it out but I knew what was happening. The clues were all there. I just didn't want to put it all together. I thought if I endure, we could be together," she then confessed her desire to stop seeing each other.

"You never once asked me to marry me even if you always push your daughters to do so. Why?" He told us that he couldn't reply not because he didn't have the answer but because he didn't want to say it.

"Why?" She repeated.
"Because I don't want to suffer another loss again," he was scared and pushed her away.

"You choose to survive all on your own." She walked out, tears running like a river.

"Everyone saw it. The drama before the real movie starts. Now, I'm a walking TV show. People want to know what happens next. What's the next episode going to be like?" he laughed.

"You okay?" He walked forward. Never looking back at us.

"I'm doing great. Being the one who got dumped made me realise something. I'm a coward because I let her suffer, bearing the pain alone. She has been by my side but I was still afraid to trust her. I was exhausted from feeling the same thing."

"You're old. You don't need anyone else besides your family. I think that is more than enough," Janey pulled everyone and squeezed the life out of us.

But she was right. He has enough love for and from us.