First day in Asgard, and I’m already being kidnapped. Fashionably, of course.

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Dear Diary,

So, update: I’m still in Asgard. Loki is still missing. And I? I have just been abducted.

Let me clarify. This isn’t your typical “thrown-in-a-dungeon” kind of abduction. No, my captor is a very enthusiastic Asgardian noblewoman who took one look at me—in my jeans and hoodie—and gasped like I had personally offended her ancestors.

“What in the Nine Realms are you wearing?” she exclaimed.

“…Clothes?” I tried.

Wrong answer.

With the kind of dramatic horror usually reserved for discovering a dead body, she grabbed my wrist and dragged me away. I protested. I really did. But have you ever tried arguing with a six-foot-tall warrior woman who could snap you like a twig?

Yeah. Didn’t go well.

Apparently, there’s a massive feast happening at the palace tonight. Something about Thor’s latest victory. The noblewoman (her name is Sif, I think? Or something equally fancy) declared that I could not, under any circumstances, attend in my “bizarre Midgardian rags.”

(Which, excuse me, I thought I looked fine. Sure, I didn’t exactly plan for an interdimensional trip today, but my sweater is comfy, and my sneakers are practical. Sue me.)

Anyway. Before I could explain that I wasn’t attending any party, I was already being shoved into a grand hall filled with silks, jewels, and literal golden armor.

I am now being dressed like a doll.

This is not how I expected my day to go.

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Meanwhile, my actual goal:

✔ Find Loki.

✔ Yell at him for dragging me into this mess.

✔ Get home before someone realizes I am NOT supposed to be here.

Instead, I am standing here, being wrapped in ridiculous Asgardian finery.

On the plus side, the dress is kind of nice. On the downside, it weighs a ton. Also, I have zero clue how to walk in this.

I am starting to see why Loki prefers leather.

…Wait. Where IS Loki?

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Session Notes:

1. Current Status: Fashion hostage.

2. New Plan: Escape before I’m mistaken for an actual guest at this party.

3. Additional Concern: This is the canonical party before Odin banishes Thor. Meaning?

Loki is probably here somewhere.

Everything is about to go very, very wrong.

Diary, if I don’t make it out, tell Loki this is his fault.