"Would you look at that, these
Horrible brutes went
And teamed up with Blueberry House,
The most save kingdom in
All of Satiation Kingdom. They're a
Bunch of lawless gang members who don't know anything. I don't even know much about their leader. This governed
Under? I can't even say governed, it's a literal gang.
Now, it's headed by someone named Blueberry Lizard Mother. I
Can hardly understand why she runs
Her kingdom like it's a gang. I heard that place was
Once a much less violent place, but it
Feels like in the past hundreds years or so that change.
Blueberry House and Pie Plaza used to be on friendly terms. Now, we're
Rivals. I booted anyone who migrated here from that kingdom pretty early into my reign.
Ugh, and here they are, ready
To cause even more problems for me. I should have
Expected this, though, I guess.
Since no one tells me anything until it's too late all the time!
Every single time someone challenges us to Kingdom
Warfare, people decide to leave out the most important details? Come on, I know my governance can be on the lazy side. But, I'm the chancellor. Quit leaving me in the dark!"
Soon entering the television station, the bright lights threatened to burn his face into oblivion. Covering his eyes, Pecan Pie Frog groaned. Ugh, who was in charge of the lights here, huh? Turn those burning suns down! Everyone huddling, a horrible decision had soon been made that would soon pour salt all over the tart.
"Chess Pie Frog, you'll be doing the trivia game," Pudding Pie Elf said.
"Huh, me?" Chess Pie Frog asked. "Why me?"
"If ya didn't have yer head so buried in yer little game, you'd know we told you the other day that yer representing us in the quiz bowl!" Blackberry Tart Hyena exclaimed. "Don't make us look dumb out there, got it?!"
Toot, toot, toot.
Kingdom Warfare, Start.
Round One: Quiz Bowl.
Two Demons will answer trivia questions. Whoever answers the most correctly gets to destroy ten Tart A Rouse.
Green skinned plant person sitting on the opposite podium, Pecan Pie Frog crossed his arm in a crisscross sitting position. Sweet and Sour Kingdom was going down. Why did they have to send his inattentive brother out on the stage? He's going to get all the quiz questions wrong and have half their towers destroyed! Wonderful.
"Welcome to Pie Quiz Bowl!" an announcer said on a podium in the corner. "In this game, you will be asked twenty questions, and whoever answers the most will get to destroy the amount of towers corresponding to the correct amount of questions answered! Let's geeeeeeeeeeet started!"
"Go, go, Pie Plaza, go go!" The crowd cheered.
"Better shut up, because I'm a trivia master!" Jalapeno Burger Plant cried.
"We'll see about that, 'cause so am I!" Chess Pie Frog cried.
"Question one," the announcer asked. "Who is the original founder of Satiation Kingdom?"
Buzz, buzz, buzz.
"Pomegranate Juice Goddess!" Chess Pie Frog announced.
Ding, ding, ding.
"That's correct!" the announcer cried. "Two points!"
Brother soon getting question after question correct at lightning speed, Pecan Pie Frog almost fell out of his chair. Spicy plant demon not getting a single buzzer in, he didn't know whether to be impressed or terrified over his kin's encompassing knowledge on Satiation Kingdom's history. He slept through history class when he was a wee impling still in school! But, that was the problem, wasn't it? Whatever.
"Question twenty," the announcer cried. "Who used to run Pie Plaza?"
Hearing such question blasted out onto live television, the chancellor almost wanted to jump up and knock this announcer out. Who dared to asked such a question? He ought to run this man out of town for this! Unbelievable, having the nerve to broadcast that for millions of demons to hear! Get real right now!
Buzz, buzz, buzz.
"Queen and King Apricot Pie," Chess Pie Frog answered sighing. And, as he said such, the crowd clapped.
"That's right, congratulations, Pie Plaza has won the trivia challenge!" the announcer cried.
Winner: Pie Plaza.
Towers that get to be destroyed automatically: Twenty.
Backup towers added to the piesball court for the opposing team: four.
Running to the piesball field, the chancellor cracked his slimy knuckles. This match would be over before he knew it, wouldn't it? Maybe, in the end, this was just a waste of time. Was there even any point? They had already basically won. Oh, well, he could go for a round of piesball right about now. Putting on a bright white cap, he slicked it backwards.
It was time to pie ball.
Backup piesball teammates coming in at lightning speed, the chancellor hissed at the Blueberry House gangsters flooding on in. But, he swore he could feel a ghostly presence as well. Oh, great, these losers from Sweet and Sour Kingdom dragged their dead friends here, didn't they? How wonderful. Just what he needed right now.
"Let me go up to bat, I can strike them out and win this in one turn, watch me," Pecan Pie Frog said, rolling up his sleeves.
"Sure, kiddo," Pudding Pie Elf said.
"I have no objections," Pot Pie Demon said, nodding. "I mean, we'll only need to score four runs since we knocked down all their towers already."
"Yeah, yeah, whatevs, I don't care, I'll be on the outfield if ya need me," Blackberry Tart Hyena said, turning his head towards the opposite direction.
"I'll be the catcher," Chess Pie Frog said.
Objective: first person to score four runs wins.
"Pecan Pie Frog is up to bat!" the announcer cried.
"Hah, you think you're so great at this game do ya?" Buffalo Wings Hydra scoffed. "Watch as I strike you out with this pie!"
Stepping up to the middle of the diamond, Pecan Pie Frog took a deep breath. Focus on hitting a home pie, that way they can crush these stupid invaders down to the ground. Announcer looking ready to scream once again, he placed the bat into a swinging position. It's go time. Sock it to him!
"And, the opponent winds up a pitch, and the pie is flying!" the announcer cried.
Rocky pie coming straight towards him, the chancellor prepared himself. This hydra sure knew how to throw a fast pitch. But, he couldn't allow himself to get impressed by this dumb dragon! Watching as she turned her head towards the Tart A Rouse, he knew he had to hurry and hit this thing with the grandest slam of them all.
Pie within a short distance of him, he positioned his legs it was time. Swinging, he watched as the stone fly was going, going, and gone. Knowing that was his chance, he made a run for it. Stupid gangsters looking ready to yoink the tart bases from underneath him, he knew it was time to slide upon the ground like his life depended on it.
Skidding on the artificial turf, he could hear the announcer scream the bases were loaded. Kin and his teammates dashing towards the last base, he broke out into a sweat. Faster, go faster, there was hardly any time left to waste. Dirt decorating his suit, he let out a tiny laugh. Now, this was more like it. This is how this kingdom should be run! Sports, and nothing else.
Reaching home base, he watched as the scoreboard had soon read four, huffing and puffing, he wiped the sweat from the brow. Four backup Tart A Rouse crashing down, he brushed his slimy palms together. Dare to challenge the sports master, then get wrecked! Screeches about a home pie shaking the stadium, everyone in the benches clapped up a storm.
"Home pie!" the announcer cried. "Pie Plaza has scored four runs!"
"You're kidding?! There's cheating afoot!" Jalapeno Burger Plant cried.
"Extend the game now!" Buffalo Wings Hydra cried.
Starved.
Opposition removed from the premises kicking and screaming that they'll be back, and they'll win next time, Pecan Pie Frog rolled his eyes. What a bunch of sore losers, they didn't even win either round of their Kingdom Warfare! And, they expected him to take their threat seriously? Were these demons real?
Holding one final meeting back at headquarters, a lot of screeches about telling him about kingdom warfare first had practically melted all the hyena demon's eardrums clean off. But, as usual, they proceeded to ignore all of such and backseat rule him. Groaning, he stomped off back home. Did everyone have to tell him what to do because of his approach on things? Unreal, he ought to fire everyone!
Brother doing nothing but play his stupid little keychain game the entire way home on the flying tart saucer, he almost wanted to toss that device out the window. But, he couldn't bring himself to do so. Whatever, he did a good job today, he guessed, answering all those quiz bowl questions correctly. He'll let it slide, for now.
Closing his bedroom door behind him, he could hear those annoying beeps continue on and on deep into the night. Letting his pillow swallow him whole, he let out a groan. He really needed to douse that thing in water. When would his brother pay attention to the world around him? The others were trying to backseat govern.
Shrugging, he curled up into a ball. Whatever, it's not like he wanted to be a chancellor anyway. Why couldn't their parents come back from wherever in the world they abandoned them to? It's not like he ever asked for this job in the first place. Thoughts soon drifting away, he let out a loud froggy snore, in an instant.
Whatever, it's not like he had a choice but the be a chancellor anyway
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