Mel leaned against the railing outside the apartment door, watching the smoke curl up into the breeze from the cigarette held between her fingers. She didn’t want to go inside, not yet. She didn’t want to face Thalia, she didn’t want to face her past, nor her future. Nor particularly did she want to straddle the line between life and death that her past and future represented. She just wanted to be. Whatever that meant. 

She took a long drag, letting the heat and smoke fill her lungs. It, in a way, felt like she was breathing life into the dead flesh. It was such an odd thing to feel the heat from the smoke, contrasting to the cold of her body now. Slowly she breathed out, watching the patterns in the smoke. Her lungs still worked mechanically but not biologically. She didn’t try and make sense of it, just observed it. 

After the second hour of just existing, smelling the night air, the rain on the wind and the damp from the river she heard the door creak as Thalia slipped into the night with her away from the warmth and the comfort of fairy lights and books and things. Mel couldn’t help the twitch to her mouth. She wasn’t sure if it was to be a frown or grin. She craved companionship, understanding what she was now but she didn’t want to drag someone she cared about into the horror of it all.

“Danny came by looking for you.” Thalia said, the barest whisper. 

“I know. I saw your text. How’d that go?” 

“Evora shooed him off with your kind’s mind tricks.” Thalia said. Mel didn’t miss the slight amusement. 

Melody simply shook her head and pulled the pack of cigarettes from her pocket and offered one to Thalia. Without hesitation Thalia took one, and Mel leaned over to light her cigarette. Thalia hummed appreciatively with a small smile. The two smoked in silence for a time, the only sounds the whispering breeze, and ambient city off in the distance. 

“I can still taste his blood on the back of my tongue, savory, bitter, a hint of sharp tang,” Mel said suddenly, gesturing with her cigarette, “And this… This is a poor substitute.”

Thalia only leaned one elbow on the railing half turning to her friend, looking her up and down, searching for something. Melody otherwise ignored it. After taking as many lives as she had in such a short time, the scrutiny was nothing. 

“So, I suppose you really are taking it all in. Accepting it.” 

“Yes. It isn’t like I have any other choice. I – don’t want to die, not again.” 

“Tell me about it? What was it like? I know I don’t – can’t understand. I’m not saying I do, but I’m still your friend. I can at least listen.” Thalia responded, before taking a puff of her smoke.

“You’re a better friend than I am.” 

“Yes, I know. You can make it up to me though.” She said, humor in her voice.

“Well, it sucked. It hurt, but it was quick, I think. It’s hard to put the pieces together. I remember more, I think, than dying.” 

“So tell me about that then. Just stop leaving me behind.” 

Melody didn’t hide the flinch or the guilt that crossed her face. She should have realized before now that this was a shit-show for all parties. Well, maybe not Evora. To her this was pure amusement. Idly Mel wondered [if she would live so long she would be the same.](“if she lived as long, would she be the same?” reads out of order) She didn’t want to die, but becoming that, seeing that felt strange as well. 

“Like, cold inky tendrils pulled me not out of the void, but into it. I can remember her voice, her command.” Mel’s  voice was raw. She wasn’t sure how she felt, just that she felt a lot of things. 

“I guess, I just have to ask then, would you rather have not… come back?” 

“No.” Mel said, quickly and with certainty, “It isn’t all bad. It’s frightening, and strange. It feels so natural at times, and only when I think about it, when I compare from before does it seem alien.” 

“It sounds like… It sounds like to me you need to accept it. Make the best of it. At the very least it seems exciting.” Mel didn’t miss the envy in her voice, nor did she particularly feel like she could judge it either. 

“You don’t get it, Thal. I’ve killed six people so far. It's been, what? A week and change?” Mel snapped. 

Thalia had the grace to look abashed and took a step back. Mel watched as she chewed her lip before looking back out over the railing. 

“Can… Do you have to kill?” She asked, her voice wavering. 

“Sometimes.” 

“When you don’t… if it makes it easier, you can you know – from me. I won’t let you deal with this alone.” 

Mel let her eyes rise to meet Thalia, and her smile curled something slow and serpentine as the red haze bloomed in her mind and the thirst began to burn in her throat. Tonight’s meal hadn’t gone nearly as far as she hoped. Saving that girl – Beth must have taken more of her energy than she thought. She took a step forward. 

Thalia took a step back, eyes wide in though whether that was fear, defiance, or anticipation she couldn’t tell. Her heart beat like a bird in a cage, trapped and fluttering, as Mel advanced, trapping her against the railing. Melody leaned in further, relishing the moment, the sweet moment as her fangs brushed taught skin – then pulled back. 

“Not tonight.” She said, her smile mischievous.

Thalia took a shuddering breath, “You absolute bitch!” before laughing. 

“You know it,” Mel laughed, “Only I get to do that, now.”

“Only you get that privilege, huh?” She said, attempting humor. She still looked on edge despite the tease.

Yes. No one can touch what is mine. 

Mel paused, letting herself take a deep drag on her smoke. 

Wait, the fuck? Did I really just think that?

“Thal, you know I didn’t mean like that. Dork.” 

They watched the horizon, waiting for that first creep of light. It was inevitable as the night, a shared moment. 

“I know you’re going to find a way to follow me in whatever this new fucked up life is. You know I’d do the same if it were reversed. If I don’t pull you along, you will find someone else who will.” Melody mused. 

“You don’t know that,” Thal said with a wry grin.

“You’re still a terrible liar. You know that right? Even without being able to hear your heartbeat, it's obvious.” 

“Cheater.” 

Melody glanced back towards the horizon, seeing light making its first peek. Dawn was coming and she didn’t want to find out what getting a face full of sun felt like on this side of things. It was time to crash. She could only hope that things would slow down enough she could catch her breath. 

“Come on Thal, let's go inside. At least, I need to.”

Melody didn’t watch to see if she followed before slipping inside and laying down on the couch, waiting for the pull to oblivion. She had to figure some things out. Rowan was a problem. Even if they worked together now, eventually she would turn against her. She wasn’t going to lay down and die though. Perhaps that made her selfish. Then, she had whatever psychos were doing all these murders to make it look like… her kind were behind it. 

Was it someone trying to stir up hunters or the hunters themselves? 

After tonight it looked like the hunters or someone inside them was behind it. She didn’t want to think what would happen if she and others like her were a known quantity. Maybe the Salem Witch Trials were… really on to something. The thought didn’t sit well with her. 

--

Thalia watched the sun rise and enjoyed the warmth on her face. She hated how Mel could read her so well. Melody wasn’t wrong. She would charge headlong into this. She would have already if she had ever found that club again. Now… she didn’t really have a reason to. She just hoped Mel would let her in. Let her help. 

Snubbing out her cigarette, she slipped back inside. She thanked everything holy and unholy that she had a day off, for covering a shift. She was exhausted. With a sigh, she realized Mel didn’t pull the blanket over her. With a click of her tongue she covered Mel before the room got too sunny. 

Mel you idiot.

Thalia knew she shouldn’t want into any of this. No normal person should, yet as she watched Mel walk into the abyss, all she could think about was what a terrible opportunity that would be wasted if she didn’t follow. She saw the danger, the blood, the death. She saw Mel slowly becoming something else. She still saw Melody under all the changes, but through a new lens.

She was beginning to see Danny’s insistence on finding Mel. There was an… edge building to her now that you’d have to be blind not to notice. So far Danny hadn’t tried to show up again, but he was constantly trying to wring updates out of her, Mel having stopped really responding to him. She didn’t blame him, she would do the same in her shoes. Still though, she wondered if others noticed or if she was even keeping in touch with anyone else. 

What would I do, in her place? 

Those thoughts terrified her in ways she never considered. Even if she did – could follow Mel into this abyss, what would she do? The world would be her enemy, she was sure. Most would see her as something awful, an aberration. But if vampires existed, what else existed? Where would they go, what would they find? How many secrets lingered just outside of humanity's view? That excited her. 

She made herself a cup of tea, something soothing and warm before sitting back in the old armchair she had. What Melody said, the thing about those icy tendrils, reminded her of how it felt when Mel had done the mind trick thing on her. She should be angry that Mel did and could have that effect on her. Yet... it only made her wonder, was this some tangible force that vampires could manipulate, or was it something else entirely. She wondered if it could be independent from vampirism and on that matter what exactly was vampirism, anyhow. Suddenly she had a puzzle, something she wanted to solve.

She hadn’t felt like this in a long time, not since the old days, when Mel and she would explore and chat over liquor. Debates with Mel never felt stuffy like they did in grad school. With the two of them it felt like trying to discover. In school it felt like results. No conclusive results, no funding, no research. It was all a power game, and she never had the power to do what she wanted. With a last glance at Mel, she realized that could change.

Am I willing to go so far, though? That, she didn’t know, then with a wry smile she realized the truth. She was a terrible liar.