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How to Get Laid by a Sexy Farmer (Surprise!)

The Festival Fiasco

The Festival Fiasco

Mar 24, 2025

San Isidro’s annual harvest festival was the talk of the town, and Isabella invited Bernie to join her. “It’s the best night of the year,” she said, her eyes lighting up. “There’s food, music, and dancing. You in?” Bernie didn’t need to be asked twice. He spent an hour getting ready, slicking back his hair and wearing his tightest shirt to show off his gym gains. When he met Isabella at the town square, his jaw dropped. She was wearing a red dress that hugged her curves, her hair cascading over her shoulders. “You clean up nice,” she said, winking at him.

The festival was a whirlwind of color and noise—lanterns strung across the streets, vendors selling lechon and halo-halo, and a live band playing a mix of folk songs and pop hits. Bernie and Isabella shared a plate of grilled corn, laughing as they got butter on their faces. When the band started playing a slow song, Isabella grabbed his hand. “Dance with me,” she said, pulling him onto the makeshift dance floor. Bernie wasn’t much of a dancer, but with Isabella leading, he felt like he was floating. Her body pressed against his, and he could smell the coconut oil in her hair. For a moment, he forgot about the world.

But the night took a turn when a group of local guys started heckling Bernie. “Hey, city boy!” one of them shouted. “You think you can handle a farm girl like Isabella?” They laughed, and Bernie felt his face heat up. Isabella rolled her eyes and whispered, “Ignore them. They’re just jealous.” But the teasing didn’t stop, and when Bernie accidentally tripped during a dance move, the guys howled with laughter. “Smooth moves, lover boy!” one of them called. Bernie wanted to disappear, but Isabella squeezed his hand. “You’re doing great,” she said, and somehow, that made everything okay.

By the end of the night, Bernie was convinced he was in love. As they walked back to her farm, Isabella stopped under a mango tree and looked at him with a mischievous smile. “You’re fun, Bernie,” she said. “I’m glad you’re here.” Before he could respond, she leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. Bernie’s heart exploded with fireworks. He didn’t notice the group of townsfolk watching from a distance, whispering to each other with sly grins.

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How to Get Laid by a Sexy Farmer (Surprise!)
How to Get Laid by a Sexy Farmer (Surprise!)

494 views3 subscribers

Bernie, an 18-year-old city boy, heads to a rural province in the Philippines for a vacation, hoping to escape his mundane life and maybe find a little romance. He meets a stunning 20-year-old farmer named Isabella, whose Latina beauty and charm sweep him off his feet, leading to a series of hilarious misadventures as he tries to win her over. In a shocking twist, Bernie discovers on the last day that Isabella is transgender, a secret the townsfolk kept to prank him, leaving him to return to the city with a wild story to tell.

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The Festival Fiasco

The Festival Fiasco

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