Ren had done a lot of questionable things in his life.

He’d lied, he’d cheated, and he’d definitely "borrowed" things without permission. But walking through an ancient city with a small army of stone guardians marching behind him?

That was new.

"You’re going to get us arrested," his companion muttered.

"Probably," Ren admitted, glancing at the constructs. They followed in eerie silence, their heavy footsteps perfectly synchronized. "But, counterpoint—who’s going to arrest me?"

She shot him a flat look. "Literally anyone with a brain."

"Eh," Ren waved a hand, unconcerned. "I’d argue possession of a stone army makes me very difficult to arrest."

She groaned. "You can’t just walk into town with an army of constructs!"

"Why not?"

"Because that’s called an invasion!"

Ren frowned. "That seems like an exaggeration."

"Does it?" She gestured wildly. "Because I count sixteen giant constructs following us, and I don’t think the city guards are going to assume they’re just here to sightsee!"

Ren considered this. "...Fair point."

A beat of silence.

Then he grinned. "Guess we’ll have to sneak in."

She stared at him. "Sneak. In."

"Yeah, you know—subtle. Stealthy. Under the radar."

She gestured aggressively at the giant, clanking guardians. "Ren, in what possible world is this ‘subtle?’"

"Look, I’ll figure something out," he said breezily. "Worst case scenario, we just bribe someone."

"With what?"

Ren blinked. "Huh."

Another pause.

"...Okay, worst-worst case scenario, we run really fast."

She dragged her hands down her face. "This is a disaster."

"You worry too much," Ren said, clapping her on the shoulder. "Come on. How bad could it be?"

—

Five Minutes Later.

—

"I’M SORRY, OKAY?!" Ren yelled, ducking as an arrow flew past his head. "HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THEY HAD A ‘NO CONSTRUCTS’ RULE?!"

"You could have USED COMMON SENSE!" his companion screamed, sprinting beside him.

Behind them, the city guards poured into the street, crossbows raised. The constructs blocked the attacks effortlessly, but that didn’t stop the fact that this was definitely a crime.

Ren dodged a fruit stand (sorry, random merchant!) and skidded around a corner. "I’d like to point out that we technically haven’t invaded!"

"Ren, they think you’re here to conquer the city!"

"I mean, not today, but—"

"STOP TALKING AND RUN!"