Chapter 181

“Lady... Penelope.” A quiet voice called out to me and I paused.

Turning slowly, I found the male protagonist who always seemed to be the one searching me out in situations like this.

“What is it?” I asked.

“I’d like to speak with you for a moment.”

“I’m sorry, but I’m afraid I don’t have anything I wish to say to you.”

“I could always tell the duke that your personal maid, who testified that she knew nothing about the incident, actually knows more than she’s been letting on.”

Surprised by the threat, I frowned and looked around. Thankfully, we were alone.

I suppose we had to have this conversation at some point, anyway. When I’d requested the poison, I’d assumed I would never have to see him again since my plan was to leave this stupid game. However, when I woke up, still trapped here, I immediately hated that he knew as much as he did.

“Follow me,” I said with a sigh, descending the stairs I’d just expended so much effort to climb.

I led him outside through one of the back doors since there were too many prying ears for my peace of mind in the manor. And I can’t be sure there aren’t any servants brainwashed by Ivonne loitering about...

I took him all the way to the center of the back garden before finally coming to a stop.

“You can talk now,” I said. Purple flowers I didn’t know the name of swayed in the wind, sending a pleasant scent wafting all around us.

It feels like there were yellow flowers here instead not all that long ago... I’d received a sentimental gift from another man in this very spot—since then we’d quarreled. It felt as though that had all happened only yesterday, but everything had changed since then. The scenery in the back garden had changed and it was a different man who stood before me now.

“Why did you lie?” Winter asked gravely while I was still lost in thought.

I lifted my head slightly to regard him seriously. “What do you mean?”

“Why didn’t you explain that the poison you ingested was a different brew to the one you requested from me?”

So he’s done pretending he’s two different people, huh? I hadn’t expected him to be so direct, so I was taken aback for a moment. The garden was big, and it wasn’t likely anyone would overhear us, but I frowned and scolded him nonetheless.

“We may be outside, but we’re still within the manor’s grounds. Please have a little more caution with how you speak.”

“I’ve cast a spell to soundproof the garden.”

“That’s good, then. Continue.”

He began to ramble quickly. “At first, I was afraid that if it came out that you requested poison from me, people would think you were trying to poison someone…” He hesitated and corrected himself. “Or rather, that you were trying to hurt Lady Ivonne.”

He really wasn’t holding anything back now that he’d soundproofed the area. He was also currently trying to make excuses for not trying to intervene before now. “Which is why I couldn’t really do or say anything until you woke up.”

His secret identity had been on the line as well, so it was only to be expected that he’d kept quiet. The man I’d done business with was just a merchant, not Marquis Verdandi. In fact, it was only because he’d kept his mouth shut that it had been so easy for me to request that my adoption be dissolved.

“I see,” I nodded nonchalantly.

Winter dove into asking his next question without even a pause for breath. “But there’s one thing I simply cannot understand.”

“What’s that?”

“It was all a plot? Why did you admit such a thing? The maid you sent to fetch the poison was not the same one who died.”

“Is that so?” I said, pretending not to understand what he was trying to say.

“My lady,” Winter’s face hardened. He seemed frustrated by my lack of reaction, choosing to address his concerns even more directly now. “I’d have preferred that you... revealed that you had bought a different poison. Then I would have been able to offer my testimony as the merchant who—”

“Marquis,” I said, stopping him with a gesture of my hand. “Please decide whether you are Marquis Verdandi or the merchant I had dealings with. You cannot be both.”

He fell silent.

Watching his wavering navy gaze, I continued slowly. “If you are speaking as Marquis Verdandi, then you are currently paying excessive interest to these matters. I appreciate your concern, but I can handle my own affairs by myself.”

“Lady Penelope...”

“And if you’re here acting as the merchant I did business with,” I paused, taking a deep breath. I chose to be blunt since that’s what he seemed to want. “You suspected me just like the others did, isn’t that right?”

Hearing my tone suddenly change, all formal politeness gone, his eyes went wide.

“Tell me, what did you really think when I had my maid request that you send me that poison?” I asked. “You thought I was a villain who planned on killing the duke’s lost daughter after she returned to take my place.”

He flinched as I perfectly described the exact thoughts that had no doubt been going through his mind at the time.

Watching him impassively, I continued, “I demanded that you supply me with the poison, even going so far as having my maid remind you of the way you mistreated me during our last meeting. You probably decided to humor me one last time and then cut ties with me forever. I requested that you deliver a poison without an antidote, but you synthesized one anyway and then brought it here.”

Perhaps he hadn’t been aware that I knew this much. Winter’s expression twisted violently. I didn’t really care about the effect my words were having on him, but it still made for quite the sight, the way his handsome face buckled into a fearsome scowl.

I had no idea what he wanted me to say. Did he want me to confess that I’d wanted to hurt Ivonne? Or perhaps he wanted to know who really administered the poison? One thing was clear to me, however.

“What does any of that matter now? All that matters is that you don’t trust me and never have. This...” I said, using my index finger to shove him away from me.

He stumbled backward even though I hadn’t pushed him all that hard.

“This is the distance that exists between us,” I said, glaring coldly at the ground separating us.

We were strangers to one another, just as we’d always been. This was me reminding him to keep his nose out of my business since we weren’t friends. Winter wore a dazed expression. I expected it wouldn’t take him long to understand what I was saying, though, since he was smart. But then his hard darted out and he clutched the finger I had pushed into his chest.

“Don’t you realize that I willingly gave you that poison even knowing that you meant to use it on someone?” I realized something was wrong as I looked into his bloodshot eyes.

“What—” I began.

“There is nothing more sacred to me than human life,” he said. “I have made it my life’s mission to prove that as a mage, I’m different from the Laila who acquire their strength through the act of taking other people’s lives. And yet! After I met you... I abandoned many of the beliefs that I’d clung to before.”

His voice was full of emotion, but his words remained puzzling to me. His grip on my finger was rather tight. Frowning, I tried to shake him off.

“Offer your excuses to someone who cares to listen to them, Marquis. You know better than anyone that I’m right.”

“Ivonne, that child...” He didn’t budge, determined to continue the conversation. He clung to my finger and the outpouring of words that came next were things I’d never imagined I’d hear him say. “She was there helping the people of the slums even before I began my work with them.”

“I don’t...”

“She would share what little she had with those around her. I met her when my interest in charitable work had just sparked and with her help I learned a lot.”

I was utterly flummoxed that he would suddenly begin describing his first meeting with Ivonne. Laughing incredulously, I mocked, “So? You must have been so afraid I might kill that little angel—”

“No! I feared something different!” Winter hollered, interrupting my accusation. “I feared how you would despair when she returned to the manor. You’d entrusted your money to me without knowing anything about her existence, and I feared you’d disappear with that money were the duke’s daughter to return!”

His previous directness seemed to pale in comparison to this naked display of emotion. “I turned a blind eye when she claimed she’d recovered her memories. I knew that returning her to the duke’s manor was the right thing to do, but I refused to do it. She continued to reside in the slums after I turned my back on her and later I heard that she’d been caught in an attack by monsters. I haven’t had a night’s rest ever since.”

“I was plagued by nightmares, fearing that I’d committed an unforgivable sin.” His face was pale, as though he were finally confessing his misdeeds to a deity. Winter hung his head slowly, pressing my finger against his forehead. He whispered in a pained voice, “Would you believe, the person I worried about first and foremost after hearing that she had returned was you? After you sent the request for the poison, I assumed you might be planning something terrible… Even still, I concocted the antidote so that I could shield you from discovery if possible.”

The tumultuous emotions raging inside him seemed to quiet a little. “Tell me, do you still believe that I don’t trust you?” He asked hoarsely.

I was at a complete loss for what to say.

Ah, I thought, my jaw hanging slack. I finally understood what had happened. The mage was supposed to bring the female protagonist to the coming-of-age ceremony, but because of his feelings for me, he’d turned his back on her. I couldn’t quite believe it, even though I’d heard his passionate confession with my own ears.

He’d always been so kind and affectionate to the female protagonist in normal mode. He was destined to bring the female protagonist to Penelope’s coming-of-age ceremony, but he’d reneged on his own values and had been ignoring her for quite some time now.

“Tell me, my lady. Do you still think I never trusted you?”

Because of this, a brainwashed Eckles had brought Ivonne instead.