Chapter 186

I shrieked and fell backward, shocked to see Reynold standing behind me.

He scowled and shoved a finger into his ear. “Hey! Why are you screaming like that?”

“You’re one to talk! Why are you sneaking around like that at this hour of the morning?”

“Sneaking? Ha! Aren’t you the one sneaking about, searching for the break in the wall at this ungodly hour?”

I found myself at a rare loss for words.

Damn it… I hadn’t known that Reynold would be awake, up and about so early in the morning, at a time when even the knights were asleep. It made me extremely nervous knowing that one of the female protagonist’s potential brainwashing victims had discovered me. I chewed at my bottom lip, frantically trying to think of an excuse.

“Up, on your feet already. You’ll get your clothes dirty,” Reynold grumbled, holding his hand out for me to take.

I stared at him with surprise for a moment, then ignored his outstretched hand and clambered to my feet by myself.

As I dusted off my dress, he asked, “Are you really going to run away?”

“What about you?”

“What about me?”

“Are you going to tell Father?” I asked, not answering his question.

His blue gaze wavered as he stared at me for a long moment. He finally replied, “If I do tell him... will you stay?”

The question was a fundamentally odd one. If he informed the duke that I’d been trying to find the gap in the wall, I would be kept confined to my room. What I wanted would no longer be of any consequence at that point.

“I don’t know,” I said, trying to imagine the worst-case scenario.

Being prevented from escaping would give the terrifying female protagonist her opportunity to forcefully take the mirror fragment from me. Then she’d be able to brainwash everyone, convincing them that I was the villain who’d made life hell for her and I would be doomed to die a terrible death… I would prefer another attempt at poisoning myself than dying like that, trapped in this wretched manor.

Come to think of it, that automatic payment system foiled me this time, but maybe I could successfully get out if I tried again. I muttered to myself, “Maybe I should just try dying again.”

“What the f*ck?” Reynold suddenly shouted. “How can you say something that right to your brother’s face? Are you out of your mind? You only barely survived last time, and yet—”

“Then don’t tell Father,” I ordered, interrupting him coldly. “Not unless you want to watch me die again.”

“You... Damn it!” He scowled, dragging a hand through his hair, deeply frustrated. He glared at me, overcome with annoyance, before suddenly grabbing my arm. “Come with me.”

“Huh?”

He tugged me along behind him, forcing me to follow on unsteady feet.

“Where are we going?”

“...”

“Reynold, where are you taking me?”

“Stop talking or I’ll tell Father everything. You hear?”

I could have easily pulled myself free of his grip since he wasn’t holding me all that tightly, but he wasn’t dragging me toward the manor. It didn’t seem like he was taking me directly to the duke, so I decided to just let him have his way.

He walked away from where the original gap was located and instead came to a stop near a secluded section of the wall. There was an enormous mound of hay piled at the base of the structure—this was where the knights’ frayed training dummies were often discarded.

Reynold glanced around, confirming we were alone, then let go of my arm and approached the pile. He pushed a few of the bundles of hay aside, revealing a rugged hole that looked to be freshly made.

“Huh?”

I couldn’t believe that Reynold was showing me this. I blinked stupidly at the hole, and he snapped caustically, “Our brother blocked up the other one because of you. Do you have any idea how much the knights despise you for—” he suddenly fell silent, though I had no idea why.

Shrugging off his strange behavior, I approached the new gap in the wall and took a look around.

Reynold asked cautiously, “Are you really going to run away?”

“I don’t know yet. I haven’t decided,” I replied carelessly, memorizing our location.

Then Reynold said something that I found even more astonishing than his willingness to guide me to the new hole in the wall. “Couldn’t you just... stay?”

“What?”

“Father promised that he would never disown you. Why can’t you just stay here instead of trying to run away?”

“Why?” I asked, sincerely confused. “I thought you hated me. Wouldn’t it be better for you if I just left?”

“I...” His expression contorted oddly, similar to how he’d looked at me right after our fight in the attic. It was the expression a person wore when they found something that was hard to bear.

That can’t be the case. Just thinking it was silly—I laughed at myself. Reynold opened and closed his pale lips several times but didn’t seem able to form words. He was a monster who’d driven a young Penelope, and myself after entering her body, to the brink over and over again.

“You’re right... I really did hate you,” Reynold finally admitted with some effort. “I thought Ivonne would never return as long as you remained here.”

I’d heard him say these words more times than I could count. I nodded nonchalantly, and he suddenly looked deeply upset.

“Don’t just nod at me! You used to be such a terrible person. Do you have any idea just how much trouble you caused?”

I sighed deeply. “I didn’t say anything. Why are you suddenly attacking me unprovoked?” I asked, bemused by his sudden aggression.

“Don’t you understand how mean you’ve always been to me, even when I tried to get along with you? You pinched me so hard on the day of my coming-of-age ceremony, I still have the scar!” He complained, drawing back one of his sleeves. I could see marks shaped like nails, a shade lighter in color than the rest of his skin, located on the inside of his arm.

That’s actually pretty satisfying, I thought, smiling to myself. “Sorry. Does that make you feel better?”

“Damn it, you little...” Reynold thumped his fist against his chest several times, deeply annoyed. He pressed his lips together, and an awkward silence fell between us.

I’d found what I was looking for, so I didn’t need to speak with him any longer. Seeing the faint glow of the approaching sunrise on the horizon, I was about to inform him that I was going back to my room when he said, “On the day of your coming-of-age ceremony when you coughed up all that blood and fell unconscious...”

This was not a topic I particularly wanted to talk about.

“I thought you were playing a prank at first.”

“I don’t—”

“I pretended I was dead after I fell from the tree outside your window, the day before my coming-of-age ceremony. And you couldn’t stop crying, do you remember? Our father had the tree cut down right away, and you threw a huge fuss about it,” Reynold reminisced, amused.

I’d never heard this particular story, so I remained silent.

“When that old marquis said you’d been poisoned, I assumed you were just playing dead. I couldn’t believe it was real. I mean, why would you do something like that, drinking poison just to prove a point? Father buys you everything you could possibly want and lets you have your way all the time. It’s not like he made any attempt to throw you out after Ivonne returned.”

“But during the week you lay bleeding in bed, I interrogated all the servants...” Reynold grew paler as he continued speaking. He paused for a moment to take a deep breath, then continued, “No one knew anything about your day-to-day schedule, where you usually went, or who you liked to spend time with. Not even your personal maid. How is that even remotely possible? F*ck, they’re paid to serve you. How can it be that they know so little about you?” he demanded fiercely.

I was relieved to hear Emily had done as I’d asked and pretended she knew nothing. I couldn’t care less about any of the other servants.

You made them that way. I’d told him this many times already, so I didn’t bother to say it again. He already knew.

“But you know… Ever since then, I keep remembering... all the times I was mean to you. I know that putting Ivonne’s necklace in your room and accusing you of stealing it wasn’t the only time I wronged you,” Reynold rambled, his shoulders heaving as he grew more upset. I noticed his eyes were bloodshot. “But I couldn’t admit it, even to myself. If I did, there would be no end to the apologies I’d owe you... and I was fairly certain you wouldn’t accept any of them, even if I tried.”

“You started treating me—no, the entire family—like we were strangers at some point.” His lovely pink hair fluttered softly around his face whenever he gasped for breath, but I watched his emotional outburst without feeling anything. His face became only more shadowed when our eyes met and he saw how little I was reacting to his words. “I’ve been thinking the same thing over and over the past few days. If I’d been a better brother to you, and not acted like such an asshole, maybe none of this would have happened.”

I had no idea if this would have been the case since I’d probably found myself in Penelope’s body from when she’d decided to treat her family as just strangers. Just as he’d said, however, if he’d just been a little bit nicer to Penelope... She wouldn’t have died. Perhaps I would never have found myself in her body in the first place.

“Maybe I’d have hated this place less,” I said drily.

“I’m sorry... Penelope,” Reynold choked out with great effort. “I... didn’t know you hated it so much here that you wanted to die.”

His apology was too little, too late. I had no idea where the girl who should have received it was now. In the end, I wasn’t Penelope, so I had no right to forgive him. Meaning to tell him that his apologies were meaningless now, I glanced up at him. My eyes widened.

“Reynold,” I gasped.

He stood hanging his head, biting down on one of the fingers he’d balled into a fist.

“Are you... crying?”

“Are you nuts? Of course, I’m not!” he hollered, rubbing his eyes with his fists.

You were crying, weren’t you? I thought as he continued to deny it.

“I wasn’t crying!”

“Hey, I didn’t say anything.”

“I wasn’t!” he yelled, glaring at me with red eyes. He stood there fuming for a moment, then the fire abruptly went out in his eyes. “Don’t struggle on your own. Tell me if you need money. When you leave, go straight to one of the mercenary guilds and hire someone to protect you. Even if it’s more expensive, avoid the run-down roadhouses and only go to the luxury inns. I can get you some weapons or scrolls imbued with defensive magic—”

“Reynold,” I said, cutting him off as he continued to formulate a plan for my escape. “Goodbye.”

His expression twisted and he dropped his chin to his chest, biting his fist again. I’d put aside making fun of him and just listened as he vented all of his old pent-up feelings.